By Traveler
iluvxf@hotmail.com
Category: Mulder POV, Mytharc, MSR, angst
Rating: R for some minor violence and some nasty words
Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully and the other characters
from The X-Files are used without permission. I just
borrowed them for my story. Lyrics to "We Have All The
Time In The World" by Louis Armstrong also used without
permission.
Summary: This is the conclusion of a trilogy I started
with YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE and FOR YOUR EYES ONLY. I
strongly suggest you read those stories first. Mulder
and Scully return to Washington only to find the
revolution has started without them and soon learn
there are many others like themselves who realize
there's hope.
Archive: Anywhere but please include all three stories
and please let me know
Author's Notes at the end.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
We have all the time in the world,
Time enough for life to unfold
All the precious things love has in store.
We have all the time in the world;
If that's all we have, you will find
We need nothing more.
Every step or the way will find us
With the cares of the world far behind us.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
FLAGSTAFF, ARIZONA
Weíve been in Flagstaff for about a month. Having
driven down here in the darkness after an evening we
shared watching the sun set on the rim of the Grand
Canyon. Scully had fallen asleep shortly after we left
the park and I was left alone in a hundred miles of
darkness to think about where life would lead us from
here. I was just as tired as she was but driving on
throughout the night was a better alternative than
reliving my dreams again. I just canít shake them or
it, itís always been the same dream or at least it was
until now. Scullyís in the bathroom of this sparsely-
furnished apartment we are renting. Sheís been in
there since we both woke from what seems like a shared
dream. I think sheís crying. Thing is, Iím not sure
what I was experiencing was actually a dream, it seemed
more like an out-of-body experience. Except I wasnít
myself.
I remember a room covered in puffy white clouds and the
sweet scent of baby powder. The soft caress of the
night breeze against my skin and the musical sounds of
a country night in the air. I remember seeing a soft
light spread across the room as someone opens the door.
It illuminates a mobile hanging over me with what look
like cows or maybe buffalo dancing in the air. I see
the face of a woman with short dark hair hovering over
me, kissing my forehead and the sound of her gentle
voice saying "Sweet dreams, William." Thatís when
Scully awoke with a jolt. I sat up with her, trying to
comfort her as she trembled next to me. When I asked
her what was wrong as she darted from the bed all she
said was 'Oh God, Mulder' and ran for the bathroom.
She is crying, I can hear her as I stand outside the
bathroom door trying to figure out what to do. Despite
all the things sheís told me about her fears and the
reasons she gave up our son, I know itís breaking her
heart. I need to tell her what I have and I need to
know on no uncertain terms what she wants to do. I
never gave consent for the adoption and as his
biological father, I could get him back. But in doing
so, I would expose not only myself, but him as well.
"Scully?" I say hesitantly as I knock on the door.
"Can I come in?"
Thereís no answer from behind the door. I grab my
jeans off the chair and slip them on, wrapping my hand
around the doorknob Iím almost surprised to find it
unlocked. I open the door slowly to find her huddled
in the corner, her knees drawn up to her chest, her
arms crossed and her forehead resting on them. Sheís
no longer crying and I almost think sheís fallen
asleep. Maybe I should have left her alone. I take
the few steps it takes to reach her, my own knees
popping as I stoop down beside her. She chuckles
softly at my distress.
"You sound like an old man Mulder," she says softly
without looking up.
I am an old man, but I donít say that out loud. "Itís
not the years Scully, itís the mileage." Iím her
private Indiana Jones.
She turns her head in my direction and I can see her
tear stained face. "I had a dream Mulder, about a
little baby." She lifts her head and looks at me with
earnest, willing me to understand who she was dreaming
about without actually having to say his name. It's
just too painful.
"He had a room with cloud wallpaper. He seemed so
happy and bubbly and then someone was kissing him
goodnightÖbut it wasnít me." Her voice trails off at
the end and I see the tears start to pool in her eyes
again. Sheís trembling, dressed in nothing but one of
my tee shirts and her underwear. I think itís partly
shock because itís not really cold in here. I caress
the side of her face with my hand.
"It was my dream Scully."
She looks at me confused. "What do you mean, it was
your dream?"
"I donít know, it was like I was him and seeing
everything through his eyes. He's safe and happy
Scully. Maybe he wants us both to know that."
I see her mood change in an instant from sadly wistful
to frightened and angry.
"What do you mean HE wanted us to know that? Heís just
a little baby. Dammit Mulder, donít start this! He
wasnít sending you thoughts and you werenít sending
them to me. Itís impossible, I donít believe it!" She
pushes herself up from the floor, exiting the bathroom
and leaving me there on the floor to believe it on my
own.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I left her alone for an hour or so. We both needed to
get ourselves together. I know she hasnít gone back to
sleep in the other room because I can hear the sound of
newspaper rustling as she reads through it and I
smelled coffee some time ago. Finally getting up the
nerve I climb out of bed and open this old suitcase
that I guard with my life. Hidden in the pocket inside
are Samís diary and the copies of Williamís adoption
records. Itís time to come clean.
I find her sitting at the kitchen table much like she
was that morning back at the trailer when I found her
going through Williamís pictures. I put the file on the
table in front of her and turn to pour myself a cup of
coffee.
"Whatís this?"
"Open it."
I see her eyes flash at me with the cryptic remark and
she flips the cover back. She sifts through the
documents as I sip my coffee. This is strong stuff,
she must need the caffine rush too. It doesnít take
her long to realize what sheís looking at especially
when she sees his photo stapled to the top of one of
the documents. I donít know what I expected her
reaction to be to this but Iím surprised at how little
reaction I actually get.
"Where did you get these?"
"Skinner"
"These are only copies Mulder, what do you hope to gain
by having them?"
"I made the copies Scully. I have the originals too.
The records are sealed by the court but if someone
tries to trace him theyíll never find the actual
records."
"They will if they find you." She wonít look at me.
"I donít have them with me."
She looks up at me surprised. "Where are they?"
I grab a piece of paper off the counter and a pen. On
it I write the name of the bank in Gallop, the lock box
number and the name Eric gave me and hand it to her.
She takes the paper from me, realizing sadly why Iíve
written it down. Just because youíre paranoid, doesnít
mean they arenít out to get you. "Commit that to
memory Scully, in some way that makes sense to you. We
need to burn these documents. I only made them to show
you."
"How thoughtful." Her reply drips with sarcasm. Two
can play that game.
"Thereís one thing missing off all those documents
Scully, my signature."
"What are you suggesting Mulder?" she says to me rather
smuggly. What does she think Iím suggesting? That Iím
angry because this was all done behind my back?
I step over to her and squat down, placing my hand on
her right arm. "Iím suggesting, thereís a way to get
him back. I never gave my consent."
I watch as she curls her lower lip into her mouth and
bites down gently, a frown forming on her tired face.
"No, we canít get him back." She says this with a
finality that makes me feel like a fool for even
suggesting it.
"Fine, then we need to burn this stuff." I say as I
get up from my crouch and go to dump the rest of my
coffee in the sink, the taste now bitter in my mouth.
"How long have you had these?" She asks my back.
I put my palms on the counter, and look down at its
surface, confessing, "Since we left D.C."
"What made you decide to finally show them to me?"
I turn around and lean again on the counter. "Last
night."
"That damn dream."
God, this is frustrating. "I wasnít a dream Scully.
YouÖyou were experiencing what I was feeling and IÖI
was feeling what William was actually experiencing.
Why is that so hard to believe? What the hell are you
so afraid of?"
"You."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Weíve spent the past couple days poring over the files
we had lifted from our office before all this began.
The guys had scanned them all to disc and sent them to
me last year. I had kept my own records for years but
when they lifted my hard drive from my apartment most
of those were lost. They had all been encrypted,
useless to anyone unless they could break the code. I
think thatís what that whole business of a trial had
been about. They wanted to know how much I knew, how
much we all knew about their colonization plans and the
cover-up created to hide it from the public. Thatís
what Scully and I have to prove with these files. That
not only is the military involved, but the government
knows about the involvement.
Iíve talked to Kallenbrunner several times, using pay
phones from anywhere in a hundred-mile radius. Iím
beginning to feel like Deep Throat or X. Iím gonna
have to buy a trench coat and meet him in a parking
garage when we finally put together some proof he can
use.
I remember years ago believing we could bring these men
to justice, make them accountable for the crimes they
had committed against the innocent. But Krycek was
right, what these men fear more than anything is
exposure. Itís what my father had tried to do and itís
what Deep Throat hoped I could do from my position
within the FBI.
I used to think it was my father and his status with
the State Department that got me that job fresh out of
college. Maybe initially it was but when it became
apparent to the higher powers within the Bureau that I
had another agenda they did everything they could to
make sure I didnít succeed.
I also used to think they valued my work but I know now
that my work was engineered to be the perfect cover-up
of their plans. They gave me this great job, provided
me with a challenging partner and free reign on my
investigations, what more could I want? The same thing
that eludes me now, proof. Keep your friends close,
but keep your enemies closer and they had me right in
the palm of their hand.
To Scully's credit, she was too smart for their plans.
Instead of making a fool of me, her scientific outlook
gave credence to our investigations. People outside
the Bureau started to take notice. And while the
status of our partnership was the number one topic of
the latest water cooler humor it also became a tool
they could use against us. The relationship that grew
from that partnership was an even greater hindrance to
my work than any other threat they could conjure up.
The bullet had been fired and I stepped blindly in
front of it.
Kallenbrunner has been able to put my mind at ease
about one thing. There is no statewide manhunt for us.
Bringing me in as an escaped fugitive would only cause
them to have to reveal how I became one in the first
place. For once their fear of exposure has left us
relatively in the clear. I wonít however discount the
idea that they could want us to develop a false sense
of security and make a mistake. We could both die in a
simple car accident and nobody would be the wiser.
Scully fears a meeting with Kallenbrunner will blow our
cover. But itís my belief that we need to come out in
the open now. Implicating ourselves in this conspiracy
is the only way we can insure our own safety. We are
both victims and a lot of the proof we need lies within
what has happened to us and the others named in the
files we have. Itís a risk but then at least dying in
that car accident would raise some suspicions.
We havenít talked anymore about William. I watched
Scully burn all the copies of his adoption records in
the gas grill on the patio. I canít shake the feeling
by her quick ënoí to my offer that there is something
more to all this than she has led me to believe. Weíre
still keeping secrets and I am no less guilty than she
is, weíre still working against each other after all
weíve been through.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Itís late afternoon and Iím sitting her flipping
between a ballgame and a movie. I told Scully to go
out for a while. We needed a break from each other.
The intensity of the last month or so has worn us down.
I gave her some money to go shopping. I don't remember
her being much of a 'shopper' and I know she resented
the fact that I gave her money to do so. Scully is a
strong independent woman and she doesn't like the idea
that she has to rely on me for support at the moment.
I know she's keeping track of what I give her,
determined that when we get back to D.C. she can
reimburse me for all of it. I don't want a damn cent
from her. This is my father's blood money and she of
all people has just as much a right to it as I do.
I hear the door to the old truck slam out in the
parking lot and the jingling of keys as she approaches
the door. When she opens it I see her trip has been
successful by the number of bags she wrestles through
the door.
"Need some help?"
"Not now," she grunts dropping the bags in a heap and
kicking the door closed with her foot. She looks
flustered and I don't know whether she's looking for
sympathy or to chew my head off so for the moment I
don't move.
"You know Mulder, if we ever leave here and go back to
civilization the first thing I'm going to do is put
that damn truck out of its misery. The AC doesn't work
and it's hotter than hell out there."
She's hated that truck from the moment she saw it. The
first time she drove it it was all I could do to resist
making another comment about her little feet not
reaching the pedals. She has to move the seat up so
far to reach them that the steering wheel is
practically in her throat. I think she wants to chew
my head off so I get up to go help her with the bags.
"It goes with the hat Scully." I start to pick up two
or three of the bags when suddenly she grabs them out
of my hands with a jerk.
"Give me those! You look like an idiot in that hat."
She scoops everything up and heads into the bedroom
leaving me standing by the door. Maybe it wasn't such
a successful trip after all.
I hear the shower come on and resist the urge to join
her in it deciding that maybe after a shower she'll
turn into something resembling human. She's been prone
to mood swings lately. A condition I've always been
famous for and I wonder how she or anyone else for that
matter ever put up with me. It's all this
indecisiveness. This not knowing where we're going.
It's eating away at both of us and as much as she fears
the consequences I know what we need to do. We need to
go home.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I'm lost in thought and the idealistic conclusion of a
movie when she emerges from the bedroom to come sit
beside me. Drawing her knees up and tucking them
beneath her robe she leans against me in what I assume
is an apology for barking at me earlier. As a
commercial erupts on the screen I wrap my arm around
her shoulder and pull her closer.
"What are you watching?"
"The Time Machine."
"The original or the remake?"
"They remade The Time Machine?" I ask her astonished
that anyone would attempt such blasphemy.
"Yeah, it wasn't very good." She snuggles against me
and I can smell the fragrant scent of her shampoo.
"This is a classic Scully, it would be like remaking
Gone With the Wind, or Ben Hur orÖ"
"Easy Mulder, it's just a movie."
"Shhh, this is the best part."
We sit together and listen as David and the housekeeper
discover George has returned to the future to rebuild
civilization with three books he has taken from his own
library. The housekeeper can only wonder when David
asks her what three books she would have taken. I've
always been intrigued by that question. H.G. Wells'
wrote all his novels in the late 19th century. His
vision of the future was both fascinating and
frightening. How would he have answered that question?
I look over at Scully with David's final line about his
time traveling friend "He has all the time in the
world."
"What three books would you have taken Scully?"
"Mulder," I get an eye roll. "There's a reason that
question isn't answered in the film. How could someone
pick only three books from which to build a
civilization? Everyone would have a different answer."
"Sort of like the way you and I see things huh?" I'm
suddenly hit with a harsh realization. "More
importantly, the way humanity sees things. We can't
even agree to disagree." My problem is that I want to
believe in Gene Roddenberry's vision of the universe.
A united federation of planets and I'm disgusted that
we can't even unite a planet.
I turn away from Scully but she quickly draws me back
with a hand on my chin. Her robe gaps and I'm treated
to a spectacular view of her cleavage making me
instantly forget my despair in favor of a little
afternoon delight. One look into her eyes and I'm
lost. Her lips touch mine and as I draw her closer to
deepen the kiss she quickly divests me of my tee shirt
in one swift move. Pushing her back against the
cushions and untying her robe I begin to explore the
plans of her skin with my mouth in a ravenous frenzy.
She runs her fingers through my hair tugging gently to
get me to look up at her.
"Mulder," she says with a somewhat dreamy smile. "We
have all the time in the world."
Oh God, Scully, if only that were true.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Note to selfÖlet Scully go shopping more often. I sit
her now in the stillness of the morning. In fact it's
still dark and I actually have no idea what time it is.
The dream came to me again during the night. Not the
peaceful visions I get from William but those
frightening images that I can't escape reminding me of
a promise I made to myself not so long ago. I will NOT
let this happen to anyone else. Spread before me now
on the kitchen table are the files I believe hold the
clues to defeating the colonists. Somewhere in here
are the answers to why they're here and the proof of
what they want from us. I'm dying for coffee but if I
start a pot Scully will be up in an instant, the smell
of caffeine beckoning her from sleep.
Somehow I woke from my dream in silence and slipped
from our bed without waking her. She lay there, hair
splayed out across the pillow, her face void of any
worry or fear. As I watched her sleep I was hit with
the powerful realization that she is why I am here.
She told me once, years ago when she awoke from a coma
that the power of my beliefs had brought her back. Did
she hear me in her sleep telling her that she wasn't
ready to go? Truth was, I wasn't ready to let her go.
Now I wonder if the power of her beliefs is what
brought me back to her. Did her God see she couldn't
to this alone either and graciously bring me back to
her side? Or am I just trying to justify a miracle? I
have seen too many of these not to believe they can
happen. It's why I told her never to give up and we
won't.
I rub my eyes with the heels of my hands. God, I'm
tired. Yesterday morning Scully told me she was afraid
of me. She's not really 'afraid' of me, she's afraid
of what I might do and she has been trying desperately
not to add any fuel to the fire I'm building. I need
her expertise. That's what made us one of the best
teams in the Bureau. We might have looked at things
differently but somehow those differences always
managed to bring us to the right conclusions. Today's
the day we go back to work.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I wake to someone's hand stroking through my hair.
"Mulder? What are you doing out here?"
Scully is standing beside me in her robe, her hair
still damp from a shower, the hand that had awakened me
gently falling to the nap of my neck as I sit up
stiffly from where I'd fallen asleep in a heap at the
table. I rub my eyes again and she smiles
sympathetically, stepping away to attend to making a
pot of coffee. She knows exactly what I was doing and
neither of us says anything as she puts together some
breakfast and I stack up the files. I watch her as she
puts the coffee on the table with a stack of toasted
English muffins, some jam and a couple plates. Then
she sits down across from me, looking me up and down,
without so much as a word.
I feel suddenly very self conscious. "What?"
"NothingÖI'm just admiring the view."
I look down at myself, I've got nothing on but the
jeans I had on yesterday, I haven't shaved and my hair
is sticking up in all directions from falling asleep on
the table. What view? She just smirks when a look at
her puzzled.
"Okay, there's a joke here rightÖwhy don't I get it?"
"Only another woman would get it Mulder," she says as
she seductively takes a bite of her muffin. "I hope
you're not planning on getting a haircut soon, I always
had a thing for that little lock that falls across your
forehead."
I suddenly feel this flush. She has a 'thing' for
scruffy Mulder. I meet her eyes letting her know I've
gotten the point and she smiles back at me in
acknowledgement.
"How long have you been out here?"
"I don't know," I say, breaking eye contact and looking
down at the coffee cup my hands are nervously
caressing. "I had another trip to Never-Never Land. I
didn't want to wake you."
She reaches across the table to still them drawing my
eyes back to hers. "You can always wake me if you need
to Mulder."
My hand closes on hers and I search her face for any
sign of pity. What I see there is only compassion and
I squeeze her hand gently. "I know. Somehow just
knowing I'm no longer alone is enough."
Breaking the connection I glance over at the files.
"We have work to do Scully. I need your help."
"I was wondering when you were going to ask," she says
as she begins to stack up the dishes and gets up from
the table. "Go take a shower, I'll make more coffee."
When I don't make any attempt to move she turns back to
me with a wicked look in her eye. "You're too damn
distracting."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After a shower and a shave and deciding that despite
her admiration for my shaggy locks I really do need a
haircut I wander back into the kitchen to find her
dressed much the same as I am in a tee shirt and jeans.
She hands me a fresh cup of coffee. "Where do we
start?"
I sit down and grab the stack of files. "The
beginning."
It isn't long before I sense this bemused look on
Scully's face as she watches me sort through them
trying desperately to focus on the right one. For some
reason I seem to be the brunt of the joke this morning.
"Now what?"
"Having a little trouble finding what you're looking
for?"
Yes, Scully, I'm a half-blind old man. I dig around
and find my glasses underneath a stack of topography
maps and put them on.
"Happy now?"
"Yes, very," she says with a purr.
This woman is as horny as a toad this morning. I
glance up to meet her eyes and find that the smirk I
had seen before has been replaced by a very hooded
expression. Where the hell did she go yesterday? I
clear my throat and look back down at the files from
Antarctica.
"Scully, the Englishman, the one I told you gave me the
vaccine and the coordinates to find you in Antarctica
explained to me that the black oil may be the original
inhabitant of this planet."
"And we're sucking it up to use it to fuel our
automobiles. No wonder they're mad at us."
I close my eyes. Is this going to go on all day?
"Okay, not the oil itself, it's just a mediumÖsomething
that is using the oil to sustain itself until it can
find another host. Regardless, it's been a part of
this planetÖpossibly since the beginnings of time.
"It's also the substance we found in that Mars rock
Mulder," she says turning serious again. "So did it
come here from Mars?
"No, that was 1908, it's been here much longer than
that. That rock was a key piece of evidence Scully,
it's what that whole charade before the Senate
subcommittee was about. If the substance in the Mars
rock is the same as the substance in the oil, it's
evidence of it being extraterrestrial. They didn't
want you or I, they just wanted that rock back." I
take a swig of coffee, the caffeine finally beginning
to jar me awake. "You know in 1996 NASA held this news
conference in Washington. They announced to a world
wide audience that they had evidence that strongly
suggested a primitive life form might have existed on
Mars billions of years ago. They claimed to have found
possible microscopic fossils of primitive bacteria in a
Mars' rock that had fallen to earth as a meteorite. If
that were true then I think this is some sort of
universal life form."
"Mulder. I saw what it did to Dr. Sacks. That wasn't
primitive bacteria."
"I know Scully. You know we laughed about it then,
this ability to 'body jump' as I called it."
Scully smiles at the reference. She thought I was
nuts even suggesting such a thing but now it doesn't
seem so funny.
"It has an intelligence Scully. I think it had a plan,
knew exactly who to inhabit to get what it wanted."
"And what do they want Mulder?"
"I think they want us Scully, but not the way the
Consortium thought. They were under the impression
that the aliens would use hybridized humans as slaves,
as servants but that wasn't the plan at all. We
weren't meant to be anything more than gestating
vessels for another life form that the virus could
inhabit. Don't you see Scully, these beings that we
think of as aliens, the grays; they're not the
colonizing force. It's the black oil, the virus itself
and the plan is to use humans to gestate a race of
superior beings, these grays, that the virus can
inhabit and reclaim the planet."
We both sip our coffee eyeing each other, not if we can
help it.
"So what's their plan? You said you saw information at
Mount Weather that the date for colonization, for an
invasion is December of two thousand twelve."
"Do you remember the bodies that were found in Phoenix?
The one whose torso had been torn away and the other
man who had been mangled?"
"Yes, and I remember you trying to tell me that it had
been done by some alien being who had birthed itself
from the body cavity of the first man only to kill the
second."
"Which you later proved to be correctÖ"
"Mulder, I only proved that the DNA from that nail
matched the virus."
I start waving my hands not wanting this to get into a
debate. We don't have time for debates and neither one
of us want to bring back the memories of that case or
my utter humiliation at being shot down in front of an
OPR board by my own partner.
"Scully! Just back the hell up a minute, okay?"
She stops the debate with a glare.
"I donít think there's going to be an 'invasion' per-
se. I think what we were dealing with there, what I
saw in that ship in Antarctica, what happened to you by
the way, was an incubation project of some sort. Proof
they were using humans as hosts to breed a colonizing
force right here on earth."
"Humans are too fragile Mulder, that's obvious by what
happened to that Rouch employee."
"I know. Lets just go back a few years." I chug the
rest of my cooling coffee and get up to pour another
cup. I motion to Scully to refill her cup but she
shakes her head. No wonder I don't sleep. I stay
where I am, leaning back against the counter.
"Both Spender and the Englishman told me that the
Syndicate's plans had to do with a deal they had made
with the colonists back in the 1940's. These men were
certain that they couldn't stop the eventual
colonization of the planet so being the selfish
bastards that they were they made a deal to save
themselves. They thought that by developing a
human/alien hybrid that could survive the colonization
process they would be able to use the gene therapy
gained in this process to protect themselves and their
families."
"You're talking about Cassandra Spender. She said once
the aliens knew of her existence that the process would
begin."
"I think she was the one the colonists knew about.
Myself and maybe others, they didn't."
"Mulder, that's speculation on your part."
"Okay, look." Just like old times I think to myself.
"My Father, Spender, Kurtzweil were a part of this.
The deal was in exchange for fetal alien tissue that
could be used in the hybrid program members of the
Syndicate had to provide insurance that they would keep
the deal. That insurance was family members. I was
supposed to be my father's insurance. Something
changed that Scully."
"What about the abductions Mulder? Were people being
abducted by aliens or by the syndicate looking for
genetic material for their program? What about what
happened to me?"
If I tell her it was the Syndicate I automatically
invalidate my own belief. She realizes this too as she
waits patiently for my answer. I set my coffee cup on
the counter, running my fingers through my hair.
"Both." That gets the smile I expected.
"I'll go so far as to admit that you, those women in
Allentown, what I found at The Center for Reproductive
Medicine, and that old age home in San Diego, were not
the result of alien intervention. You're right, they
needed genetic material, ova, and a way to gestate what
they were trying to create." I see her expression
change and I step towards her, running my hand down her
arm as I stoop to her eye level. This is bringing back
painful memories for both of us.
"Cassandra on the other hand is another story. I think
the aliens were abducting her to monitor the progress.
And I will tell you without a shadow of a doubt that no
human was responsible for what happened to me or the
other abductees in Oregon."
I search her face, seeking acceptance of my statement.
I am not disappointed.
"Mulder, you don't have to debate the existence of
alien life with me anymore. I'm willing to believe in
the possibility. And I will tell you without a doubt
that I'm well aware of the threat that possibility
means to humanity." She turns to look at me, all the
indecisiveness gone from her expression. She's
absolutely serious.
"What you're saying is that the colonists and the
Syndicate in a sense duped each other. The Syndicate
believed that in exchange for hostages or 'insurance'
as you call them, they would get alien technology and
genetic tissue with which they could create a way to
save themselves when colonization took place. What
possible need would the aliens have for these hybrids?
I can't believe it took these men this long to figure
out that they were only helping to create a better way
for the colonists to gestate more of their own kind."
"Not their own kind Scully. Beings the virus could
inhabit. It does seem pretty absurd doesn't it? But
what the colonists didn't know was that behind their
backs certain members of the Syndicate where trying to
create a way to thwart the colonization plans."
"Men like your father."
I can't help the gentle curl that comes to my lips with
her last comment. Scully refuses to believe I'm in any
way related to good old 'Smokey'.
"And Spender."
"Spender! Are you insane?" She hesitates for a moment.
"Don't answer that."
"Scully," I say pushing myself up from the crouch I'd
been in. "I have no room in my heart for that bastard
either but I do believe now he was on the right side."
"What?"
I turn around and sit on the edge of the table.
"The guy was an assassin Scully, the perfect henchman
to protect their hidden project. The one you and I
would surely have exposed had he not been there to
cover it up."
"But I thought you wanted to expose them Mulder?"
I drop my head, my eyes coming to rest on my bare feet.
I did want to expose their inhuman practices and
unethical means but now I realize what they were trying
to do and I have no right to jeopardize what might be
our only chance at stopping the inevitable.
"They had a plan Scully, my father had a good plan." I
look up again to meet her eyes and find she's puzzled
by my change of heart.
"How do you fight a virus Scully?"
"ByÖby developing a way to immunize against it. By
finding a way to trigger the body's immune system to
build a defense mechanism against the disease. You
need to develop a vaccine that will cause the immune
system to produce antibodies to attack the disease."
"Isn't that what they were trying to do?"
"Well yes, but my God Mulder, the way they were going
about it." She's horrified now, thinking that I
condone what was going on. "The abductions, the tests,
how many lives will it take? What about Emily?"
I get up off the table walking away from her with my
hands on my hips. "Jesus Scully, I'm not saying that
was right. You know me better than that." I turn
around again and face her. God I hope she does. We
glare at each other until she has to look away.
I pull the chair back out and sit facing her taking off
my glasses and rubbing my eyes.
"Isn't it true that people who have been exposed to a
virus and survived it may produce antibodies that could
help fight the disease in others?"
"Yes, but that's a passive vaccine, it's not a long
term cure. In order to develop an active vaccine you
need the virus itself to work with, it takes time and
in this case could be extremely dangerous."
"Scully, from what we know about the colonization
plans, do we need a long term cure right now?"
I drop my arms to the table and just stare at her.
Think Scully. Think.
I watch her face as realization dawn across it. She's
finally beginning to think that my little project
within the project theory might not be a fantasy after
all. But it's not just me. She's survived it to and
perhaps there are others.
"You too, Scully."
"Antarctica."
"Do you remember what you told me? That within every
illness lies its cure? I held it in my hand Scully. I
used it to save you. I was vaccinated with it in that
Russian gulag. There has to be a way to replicate it
orÖor to find the men in Russia who have been
successful in producing it. The Englishman told me it
was a weak vaccine. Maybe it just needsÖyour
expertise."
She reaches across the table to take my hand. I'm
surprised at how cold hers is.
"I'm not a miracle worker Mulder."
"Don't sell yourself short Scully. Everything happens
for a reason, right?"
I watch her nod ever so slightly.
"Why do you think Spender made us partners?"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
We spent another hour debating the ethics of the
Syndicate's research. By what we had found at the
nursing home in Boca Raton it's obvious that there is a
way to expel the virus from the body. The only problem
is it kills the patient at the same time. The Russian
vaccine I was given and what I injected into Scully
didn't kill either of us meaning they have perfected it
to some point, I wonder how many lives it cost them to
do that. We're both certain there is a better way to
go about this but unfortunately this little apartment
is not the place for experimentation.
Scully is still skeptical about my immunity theory and
the only way to test it is to find the live virus and
experiment with it using ourselves as test subjects.
The thought of that makes even me shudder. I never
told her everything about my experiences in Tunguska.
About the icy cold sensation as the vaccine was
injected into me or the fiery burning of my eyes and
nostrils as I felt the oil creep across my face.
Suddenly my whole body was on fire. I heard the others
screaming around me, finally giving in to the impulse
myself. Then my mind had been consumed in blackness
and any memories of what happened next was lost.
Scully also realizes that an apartment in Flagstaff,
Arizona is no place to do research. She's trying to
ignore the inevitable. We have to get ourselves back to
D.C. We're going to have to walk right in to the
lion's den but before we can do that we have to have
some insurance of our own.
According to Kallenbrunner there's already a big shake
up happening within the FBI, the case against the
military also implicates the government. Can we trust
him? What we've seen in the papers is very vague.
Someone is keeping the press out of this. Scully's
afraid it's a huge setup. She's more paranoid than I
ever was. I'm certain they know where we are, they
don't have to set us up. I think they could nail us
whenever they want. So why haven't they? Actually I
think the answer is rather simple. We have no proof,
nothing tangible anyway. Stacks of eyewitness accounts
and here say have never proven anything. We need
something we can throw in the their faces. Something
undeniable that we can present to the world.
We had something amazing. Something we could have used
to prove that this wasn't all nonsense. Thank God
Scully had the courage to protect it. That she still
has it. I'm not that strong.
Through the years we have left a trail of disappearing
evidence behind us. Implants, microchips, photographs,
fetal tissue, abductees. That evidence has got to be
somewhere.
Years ago Cancer Man let me walk out of the DOD's
Advance Research Project Facility with a cure for
Scully's cancer. What else would I have found deep
within the walls of the Pentagon? Would he have let me
walk out with other evidence had I had the
consciousness to look for it?
Scaly found me naked and barely conscious spread eagle
on a DOD operating table with what was left of my mind
aided by Diana's key card. It's all happening right
under the public's nose.
Whatever Spender tried to take from me that day I think
he did it because he didn't think I had the guts to go
through with this. He was ready to go to any lengths
to hinder the invasion and preserve his power. I don't
want the power, I never have, but I too am willing to
go to whatever lengths it takes to make things right.
My head is starting to pound from fatigue and too much
caffeine. I get up from the table at Scully's
questioning gaze. I Grab the keys and my wallet off
the counter and wiggle my feet into my shoes without
socks. Scully starts to gather the papers together
without saying anything. She grabs our coffee mugs and
puts them in the sink. I reach the door before I hear
her question my actions.
"Where are you going?"
"Shopping."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I was gone most of the afternoon. I drove down to
Clarkdale and called Kallenbrunner to tell him that if
it was evidence he was looking for then I knew where he
could probably find it. He wanted to know how the hell
I thought they were going to get a search warrant for
The Pentagon. On the way back through Flagstaff I
stopped and sold the truck at one of those auto-pawn
joints and rented a car telling them I was going to
drop it off in LA. I stopped and got a hair cut and
then headed back to the apartment. None of it made me
feel any better.
Scully was curled up on the couch reading when I walked
in the door. Disappointment evident on her face when
she saw my hair. Actually I'd compromised and left it
longer on the top but I think she still took it as an
act of rebellion on my part. She knew I wasn't a happy
camper when I'd left earlier. She doesn't disagree
with me she just thinks we're going about this way too
quickly. She doesn't know it yet, but we're heading
for LA via San Diego. I'm going to give her one last
chance to walk away.
"Not a very productive trip." She acknowledges the
fact that I came in empty handed.
I toss her the keys to the rental. "I sold the truck."
She turns the tag over revealing the Lariat emblem
attached to a very familiar Ford key and smiles.
Untangling her legs she gets up, walks to the window
and peers through the blinds at the silver Taurus
parked outside the door.
"We should have taken a picture of the truck," she says
looking back at me. "Nobody will ever believe you
actually bought that thing."
"A fantasy fulfilled."
She crosses the room, brushing her hand down my arm as
she passes me on the way to the kitchen. "You hungry?"
I hadn't even thought about it until she mentioned it.
I'd survived the day on caffeine. I'm hungry for a lot
of things Scully, but dinner will do for now. I watch
her open the oven door to check on what ever she's
already made and a little part of me momentarily thinks
about that other fantasy I'd had in what now seems a
century ago, a family life. She glances up at me
wondering why I haven't answered her. I just stand
there mesmerized by where I wish we could be.
"You okay Mulder?"
Reality raises its ugly head. "YeahÖI'm fine." It's
out of my mouth before I've even realized I said it.
She shuts the oven door and takes a couple steps in my
direction. I look away from her, shuffling my feet. I
can't move. She came back yesterday horny as hell and
here I stand lost in a life we can never have.
"What's wrong?"
I look at her and then look away again. "I'm," I shake
my head, this is ridiculous. I let out a chuckle.
"I'mÖjust thinking how absurd this is. The man of the
house, coming home to the little wife who's been
slaving all day over the stove so dinner can be ready
when he gets here. This isn't us is it Scully?"
She looks at me like I've grown two heads. "What on
earth made you think about that"? She asks with a hint
of humor until she realizes I'm not trying to be funny.
Truth is I'm fucking scared to death of what we're
about to do. The guys tried to tell me, we could have
high tailed it for Canada and oblivion, and no one
would care. We could probably live out the rest of our
lives together passively sitting back with everyone
else while we watched the world end.
She steps into my space wrapping her arms around me and
resting her head on my chest. I accept her embrace
wrapping her in my arms, my chin on the top of her
head. We just stand there for a few moments listening
to each other breath. I know she can hear my heart
beating.
"When are we leaving and were are we going?"
I can barely hear her when she speaks. And I pull back
to look at her face. What I see there surprises me.
There is no fear, only the strength and trust she has
always given me. I caress her face and place a gentle
kiss on her forehead. Thank you Scully.
"As soon as we're ready, the LA field office."
Accepting the inevitable she steps away. "Did you call
Kallenbrunner?"
"Yeah, but I didn't tell him we were coming in."
"Did you get us a flight?" She asks walking back into
the kitchen steadying herself with putting dinner on
the table.
"I got us a car."
"We're driving?"
Yeah Scully, we are. This just might be the last road
trip we ever take together but I don't tell her that.
"It's only about 10 hours."
She looks at me exasperated. "Mulder, you're dead on
your feet, don't tell me you're not."
"You can help. That's why I got the carÖyou're little
feet can reach the pedals."
She's right, I am dead on my feet and my reflexes
aren't that good because I don't duck fast enough as
the towel she used to get the dish out of the oven
smacks me in the face.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
BARSTOW, CALIFORNIA
We said hardly anything to each other during the whole
seven hours it took us to get here. We'd spent a day
in Flagstaff putting things together. I'd told the
landlord we were leaving. The rent was paid until the
end of the month and he had our security deposit so he
didn't really give a damn. Scully had been quiet the
whole day. It was sort of like preparing for your own
funeral. She's sitting on the other bed reading while
I flip through channels looking for something to take
my mind off tomorrow.
I lied to her yesterday. I 'd made two phone calls
while I was out. The second was to her brother in San
Diego. He has no idea what's going on only that no one
had heard from Dana in over a month. Mrs. Scully knew
she was with me and Dana had told her not to worry. I
didn't tell him anything, only that I had some business
to take care of in LA and I'd be glad to drop her off
for a while to visit. I know he didn't want me around.
I don't know what's going to happen when I walk into
the LA field office. They're either going to shake my
hand or slap cuffs on them and I don't want Scully with
me when I find out. She'll be furious but right now I
have to talk her into making this unexpected stop.
I find a ballgame and roll over on my stomach to watch
her read. She senses she's being observed and looks
over at me.
She glances at the screen in disgust. "You know if you
found something interesting I might just put this book
down and come join you over there."
"What's wrong with baseball? I thought you liked it,"
I add wiggling my eyebrows.
A cool summer night comes back to both of us. My arms
wrapped around her as we shagged balls high into the
starry night. Listening to Scully giggle as I
enthralled her with my witty conversation made me smile
more than I had in years. I learned two things from
Arthur Dales. Baseball does keep you forever young and
the matters of the heart are far more precious than
getting to the heart of any matter. She closes her
book lost in the same thoughts I am.
"Get over here, Scully." I motion with my head much as
I did that night coaxing her to step up to the plate
and join me.
She gives in, turning off the light and grabbing the
pillows off her bed, tossing them at me as she comes
over to climb in beside me. We jostle them around and
I end up with my back against them and her snuggled
against my side, her head on my chest.
"Who's playing," she asks as I rub my hand up and down
her arm.
"San Diego Padres and the Giants." I picked this game
for a reason.
We sit for a while just watching the game. I start to
tell her Arthur's theory that all the great ball
players were aliens. How he said they didn't fit in,
'Not in this world, not in any other world.' It makes
her laugh but then she looks up at me. "Sort of like
us. We don't fit in. Maybe we're the aliens here
Mulder."
I kiss the top of her head.
"You know he and I had this same conversation because I
couldn't figure out if he was trying to tell me that
they were aliens who wanted to be human or humans that
wanted to be aliens or something in between."
"What did he tell you?"
"He said something about a dog's chemistry being almost
identical to a mans'."
"There is very little difference in the genetic make up
of a lot of species Mulder."
"I knew you 'd tell me that but it doesn't make him a
man does it?"
"Of course not."
"He said to be a man is to have the heart of a man.
Integrity, decency, sympathy; these are the things that
make a man a man."
"I've been trying to tell you that for the past two
months."
That she has and I still don't listen. Time to change
the subject.
"Your brother still lives in San Diego doesn't he?"
"Yeah, he's still at Miramar, why?"
I've got to play this cool or she's going to figure out
my motives. She knows her brother hates me and there's
no reason I'd want to see him.
"It just crossed my mind, we're not that far away."
"I thought you wanted to go to LA?"
"That's the final destination yes, but weíre not on a
deadline here Scully." I stroke her hair. "You've got
family, people that are worried about you. I was just
thinking if you wanted to stop we could."
What if she doesn't? She doesn't say anything for a
while. There are a lot of issues between her and her
family. Things they don't understand and are
unbelievable to explain. I can understand her not
wanting to face that right now.
"I don't know what I'd say to him Mulder. How do I
explain what's happened."
"Who says you have to? He's your brother Scully, you
shouldn't have to explain your actions to him."
"Mulder, if you showed up at his door right now he'd
probably kill you."
I'd thought of that.
"I could just drop you off. You could call when you
want me to come get you."
"Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"
"Yeah I do. But if you want to see them I can handle
it."
She turns in my arms. "You're serious aren't you?
What would you do with yourself?"
"I don't know, drive out to the beach or something. Go
shopping."
"We donít need another car Mulder."
"I'll find something to do Scully. Think about it
okay."
She nods her head gently against my chest then reaches
for the remote and turns off the television leaving the
room in total darkness. Her hand comes up to pull my
face down to hers but instead of our lips meeting hers
end up next to my ear and I hear her whisper
seductively into it.
"How about if we work on my obscenely overdue triple-x
bill?"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA
Scully called her brother this morning from our motel
room. It's been another quiet drive. I'm sure she
knows what I'm up to and yet she's going along with it.
We both know it makes sense. This has always been the
way we did things, separately watching out for each
other. This could still be a well-orchestrated trap
and there's no point in both of us walking into it.
She doesn't know it but inside her shoulder bag are
copies of everything we put together over the past few
days. If we get separated now at least we are both
armed with information.
I turn the corner onto Bill's street and I feel her
tense up beside me. I don't know if it's the
anticipation of a confrontation with Bill or that we
both realize that this could be goodbye. I hear her
swallow and she doesn't look at me when her arm comes
up to point out the house.
"It's the third one on the left."
I pull into the drive but don't kill the engine. We
just sit there for a minute and then she gathers her
bag from the floor. The screen door slams and I look
up to see a young boy about 5 or 6 come running across
the lawn towards us. Jesus, is that Matthew? His hair
is light and when he gets close enough I can see his
blue eyes. I lump forms uncontrollably in my throat.
Is this what William will look like? He stops a few
feet from the car when Scully makes no attempt to open
the door.
"Hey Aunt Dana!"
She gives him a little wave and then turns back to me.
"You sure you don't want to come in?"
I'm not sure why she asks that. She knows Bill doesn't
want to see me and that doing so would only provoke
feelings that are better left hidden. Maybe she's just
looking for some support.
My hands are stuck to the steering wheel because what I
want to do, hug her and never leg go, I can't.
"No, I think it's better that I don't. Just call me
when you want me to come back and get you."
And if you don't want me to come back, don't call me
and tell me so. Only I don't say that out loud either.
She sighs and looks up at the house. Bill is standing
in the doorway now glaring at us and Matthew looks a
little confused.
She looks back, right into my eyes and I see the pools
of moisture that she won't let fall.
"Do you have your gun?"
I don't say anything, I can't. I just tug on my pant
leg to let her know I'm wearing it.
"It's an unregistered weapon Mulder, don't walk into
the Bureau wearing it." She confirms my suspicions of
earlier. She knows exactly what I'm up to.
"Scully, IÖ"
She doesn't let me finish, reaching over to press her
fingers against my lips.
"I know what you're doing Mulder and I know why you
didn't tell me. You haven't changed a bit and I hate
you and love you for it at the same time." Her hand
caresses my cheek. I hope Bill is getting an eye full
of this. "Please be careful." And then her hand goes
around to the back of my neck and she's pulling me into
a kiss that's passionate and desperate and eternal. I
hug her back but words still escape me. Finally
breaking the kiss when all the air has left my lungs.
She smiles warmly and then devilishly at me.
"I will call you in about three hours Mulder. If I
can't get you on your cell I'll call Kallenbrunner at
the Bureau. Is that okay?"
We had bought a couple of those cell phones with the
minutes already programmed into them. Scully had been
amazed that I had managed to survive without one for so
long. Finally finding my voice I acknowledge her
question.
"Yeah, it'll take me a couple hours to get up there."
Knowing Scully as I do, if this all goes to hell she'll
be on her way to LA to save my ass as usual. I canít
let her do that now; the stakes are too high.
"Look, if you cant' get in touch with either of us,
don't come looking for me. Promise me that. Just stay
with your brother. I'll know you're safe that way." I
stroke her hair and give her a chaste peck on the lips.
She reluctantly nods her head. "You trust him don't
you?"
"Kallenbrunner?"
She nods again.
I don't know why but I do. I sensed those days in the
courtroom that he was just a pawn who had gotten in
over his head because of his legal background and was
putting up a good front to earn some brownie points.
He's smart though and now that he knows what the stakes
are, he refuses to play the game. He's not the only
one. Or so he says.
"Yeah, I do."
I watch her gather up her bag and pop open the door.
Matthew jumps right in with a hug and Scully stoops to
accept it. I see him look at me from over Scully's
shoulder and I give him a wink. He smiles back at me.
The innocence of youth, may they never know the horrors
that await them.
I stay in the drive as Scully closes the door and watch
as she walks across the lawn with Matthew and into her
brother's embrace. Tara has come out onto the porch
too holding a toddler. This is what it's all about
Scully. Something I've known only in my dreams but
refuse to let go of. I put the car in reverse and back
out of the drive as they all go back into the house. I
watch Bill close the door, putting the car in gear I
drive away.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
FBI FIELD OFFICE, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA
I've sat out here in the parking lot for 10 minutes
trying to decide if I should do this or not. Fight or
flight. Do or die. Finally I pull the phone from my
pocket and dial Kallenbrunner's number.
"Kallenbrunner."
"I'm sitting in your visitor parking lot. What do you
want me to do?" I'm surprised my voice works.
"Mulder?" I hear him whisper into the phone. "Shit,
you're here?"
"Physically, but I have to tell you I'm seriously
considering hitting the gas and getting the hell out of
here."
"Fuck, I'll be right down. What are you driving?"
"Silver Taurus, can't miss it."
A couple minutes later I jump when the passenger door
opens and Kallenbrunner slides in beside me. I look
around the car half expecting the area to be swarming
with armed agents but we're alone.
"Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." He looks a little
alarmed. "What the hell are you doing here? Where's
Agent Scully?"
"She's not here."
He just nods at my reluctance to answer his question
truthfully. Trust no one.
"The shit it the fan yesterday Mulder. They raided the
Pentagon."
Now it's my turn to be shocked. "What? What did they
find?"
"Nobody's talking. Look, this isn't exactly a
sanctioned operation. A lot of people including me are
putting their asses on the line for you two."
Kallenbrunner's not much younger than I am, probably
Scully's age. He obviously has a legal background,
which is how he got railroaded into posing as the
prosecution. He has also figured out that getting
picked for that swell assignment had nothing to do with
his smarts. They wanted somebody they could maneuver
and who was expendable if things didn't go the way they
planned and now he knows he's gotten himself into
something monumental. I suddenly get the impression
that this whole thing isn't as cut and dried as I
thought.
"Are you telling me that this isn't exactly an
approved investigation? Just exactly WHO is involved
in this?" Now he's got me worried.
I notice sweat has started to break out on his forehead
and it's not because it's hot in the car. I left it
running and the AC is on. He's scared to death. I
keep looking over my shoulder.
"Look Mulder, I'm just a shmuck but I knew something
wasn't right at that hokey trial. You can't try a
civilian in a military court, there weren't even going
to be any court records and the when Agent Scully came
in with evidence that would exonerate you and they
dismissed it, I knew you'd been set up. The question I
had was why? I went home like a good little boy but I
couldn't sleep. You have a reputation you know, not
just the 'Spooky' persona, but of someone who's not
afraid to fight for what's right. There are a lot of
people in the Bureau who admire you for that wish they
had your courage. God, what you said to those bastards
when they found you guilty. I didn't want to be a
victim, there are a lot of others who don't either."
I sit dumbfounded by his honesty. Who are all these
people who have suddenly come out from the woodwork to
support me?
"I came back and requisitioned some case files of yours
and what I found scared the shit out of me. How come
nobody ever put two and two together here Mulder?"
"Because the top brass is in on the cover-up and the
rest just flat out refused to believe me." I catch the
sick look on his face.
"We don't have any evidence of alien involvement
Mulder, but we got enough to take to the Attorney
General on a cover-up involving the military and
unsanctioned medical experiments. Skinner's working on
it in D.C.
"Skinner?"
"Yeah, he was your A.D. right?"
Suddenly not only is he scared to death, so am I.
Skinner, Kersh, they got us out of DC but at what cost?
Gibson told me the last time he saw either of them was
when they had been called into the Director's office
and both of us are pretty damn sure the Director is not
of this earth. How could Skinner be running a covert
operation without them knowing about it?
"KallenÖ," I shake my head, I should be a little more
personal with this guy. "You got a first name?"
"David"
"Dave?"
He nods.
I look him in the eye. "I know Skinner, I trusted him
for years but right now I'm not real sure he's really
who he claims to be. Things happened when Scully and I
left DC. He could have been compromised. These 'men'
would be able to tell if he was working against them.
The can read minds."
He stares at me for a minute, unsure of whether or not
to believe me. Mind readers. Yeah, buddy, I'm
beginning to think I'm one too.
I look down at my watch. It's been a little of two
hours since I dropped Scully off at her brothers. Dave
and I are going to look a little suspicious if we sit
out here in the car together much longer.
"Hungry?"
"Huh?"
I back the car out of my parking space. "I'll buy you
a sandwich, we need to talk."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
We found a little deli far enough away from the Bureau
office that the likelihood of anyone else stopping in
was slim. I don't know who was more nervous,
Kallenbrunner or myself. I lost my nerve years ago, I
think it was part of what Spender took from me or maybe
now I just value my life more than I did back then. I
sat and watched him pick at his food and continuously
glance nervously out the window like he was expecting
the hounds of hell to track us down.
When I told him back in the car that I wasn't sure
about Skinner I felt all the wind go out of his sails.
Now he's afraid that if Skinner is one of them and he
arranged for the raid on the Pentagon then whatever
evidence they found would now end up in the hands of
the very people we're accusing of hiding it.
The misconduct case he filed against the military won't
stand up unless he can produce the person he's claiming
was unjustly tried and convicted and that unfortunately
would be me. Under military law I have the right to an
appeal but being an escaped fugitive doesn't do much
for my character. Truth is I didn't belong in a
military court in the first place and that court wasn't
conducted under any normal rules or procedures. There
are no records other than the eyewitness reports of
those who testified and Kallenbrunner. If anything,
I've got a case against the military for cruel and
unusual punishment but I can't prove that either. None
of this makes a damn bit of difference anyway.
What we have to do is prove that certain groups within
the military and the government itself are involved in
a conspiracy against the public. That they've made an
alliance with an alien race in what they thought was a
deal to gain technological advancement and that an
elaborate system of cover-ups has prevented this
information from being known. The plot has to be
exposed and we need whatever was found in the Pentagon
to prove it.
When Dave asked me how we were going to find out whose
side Skinner was on I told him that there was only one
way. We had to go to Washington.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
On the way back to the LA office my phone rang. I knew
who it was going to be and as I fumbled the phone from
my pocket I almost gave the game away by answering
'Mulder'.
"MulÖyeah."
"Hi." With one little word she grounds me. "Where are
you, you sound like you're driving?"
"Taking Dave back to the office."
"Dave?"
"Yeah, we just had lunch."
"Are you coming home?"
"Do you want me to?"
"I never wanted you to leaveÖ"
I sigh, I had to do it this way Scully, and you know
that. We've kept the conversation generic, Dave keeps
glancing at me, he knows who I'm talking to and he
knows why we're talking in riddles, somebody could be
listening. Time to cut this conversation short,
Scully's a sitting duck.
"See ya in a couple hours."
As we pull into the parking lot Kallenbrunner looks
over at me.
"What do we do now?"
"Whose involved with you in this, here in LA?
"Just my SAC, Marcus DeLille."
I don't recognize the name but then being out of the
mainstream for the past couple years has left me with
few contacts.
"Okay, don't let him know you were in contact with me,
not yet. He needs to get you to Washington and Scully
and I need to be on the same plane. I'll be in touch,
tomorrow."
He opens the door but before he steps out of the car he
turns to me and I see something akin to regret on his
face. "Look MulderÖI just want you to know that I'm
really sorry about everything I said to you and about
you during the trial. IÖI just had no idea what this
was all about then andÖand from what they had given
meÖ"
I don't let him finish. He has no need to apologize to
me for doing his job. "I know, I looked like a quack."
He smiles softly and I reach across the seat and extend
my hand in thanks.
"You don't need to apologize to me. You were just
doing your job. It's me that should be thanking you.
You may not realize it, but what you've set in motion
may just save all of us."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
BILL SCULLY'S RESIDENCE, SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA
I was really hoping they'd all be out front when I got
here, it would give me an excuse to just stay in the
car but now I'm standing on Bill's front porch feeling
more ill at ease then I did in the Bureau parking lot.
I'm glad when Tara answers the door. She smiles
graciously and opens the door.
"Hello, Fox. Come on in."
"Thanks."
I step hesitantly inside the house. It doesn't look
much different than it did five years or so ago when
Scully called me out here on a more personal matter.
It brings back a time in our relationship I've tried
very hard to forget. I wonder if she feels the same.
Tara motions toward the living room.
"Dana's in there."
I turn and take a few steps into the living room and
freeze. Scully is sitting on the floor playing with
the toddler I had seen Tara holding when I dropper her
off earlier. She looks up and smiles.
"Hey."
A flood of emotions overwhelms me and I can't speak.
I'm suddenly hit with that same vision I had back in
the apartment in Flagstaff, coming home to my wife and
dinner only now our son's been thrown into the mix, the
family I've never had. I manage to nod and amble
slowly over to where they are playing. Scully can see
the pain on my face and she scoops the baby up as she
stands.
"This is Katie," she says and makes to hand her too me.
With the slightest shake of my head I manage to choke
out an "I can't" just as Katie squeals and wraps her
arms around Scully's neck. I step a little closer and
brush her golden curls away from her face. I've always
been desperate for contact, to connect to other people;
it's like I have to touch them to know for certain that
they are real.
I think Scully was a little taken aback that first time
I caressed her face that morning after her father had
passed away. She might have thought it was a
condescending gesture, like I was consoling a child but
I was just trying to let her know I was there if she
needed me. She looks at me now in much the same way.
"Katie's working on her terrible two's"
"She doesn't look terrible to me, I think she's very
pretty." And further proof that the world went on
without me just fine.
I hear the floor creek and look over to see Bill
standing in the archway between the living room and
dining room. New England manners dictate that I make
nice so I extend my hand to him.
"Bill."
He however makes no effort to remove his hands from his
pockets to accept my greeting. My own hands end up in
my pocket as I sigh tilting my head back and closing my
eyes in resignation. If only you knew Bill what a damn
lucky man you really are. I hear Scully put Katie down
and open my eyes and look down at her. Bill's still
standing there watching or waiting for me to make some
smart-ass comment. The spell is quickly broken when
Tara bustles into the room to ask if I want something
to eat. I beg off stating that I had a late lunch and
then quietly I ask Scully if she's ready to leave and
she nods.
I retreat to the hallway and wait as Scully gathers up
her things and I hear Tara ask if she has the pictures
of the kids. Bill has disappeared, perhaps to go find
Matthew. I hear a clamor out on the porch and Matthew
peers inside the door holding a baseball mitt. Scully
and Tara and the baby all file out the door. I'm just
about to follow them when someone calls my name.
"Mulder?"
I turn around. Bill is standing at the back of the
hall. I take a few steps back so we're not carrying on
a conversation across ten feet of uncarpeted wood
flooring. He takes a few steps in my direction and
suddenly I'm slammed into the wall by his big fists
balled in my jacket. The impact jars the family
photographs behind me and I raise my hands in
surrender. I glance out the door but no one is in
site. They must have all gone out onto the lawn. Bill
pounds me against the wall again to get my attention.
I'd like nothing more than to deck this guy but what I
sense in his rage is not anger, it's fear. Scully has
told him everything.
"This is all true isn't it?" He snarls at me.
Jesus, he believes her?
"You know Mulder, I used to think you were a fucking
lunatic and that my sister was fucking crazy to work
with you. But I know she had to bury you and I know
what that cost her.
"And now you've got that dead man pinned against your
wall."
He lets go of my jacket and I drop my hands. He steps
back a few steps so we're no longer nose to nose
looking down at his feet and then nervously back to me
again.
"I know about some of the cover-ups but I swear to God
I had no idea what was going on."
"You weren't supposed to Bill, nobody is."
"Where is this all going? What about my Tara, my
kids?"
I meet his eyes, what about my kid Bill? He doesn't
have to be a mind reader or even psychic to know what
I'm thinking and he looks away, out the door to his own
son playing on the lawn.
"That's why she gave him away isn't it?"
"We've only got ten years Bill." I start to walk away
from him, towards the door when he grabs my arm and
spins me back around.
"Mulder, if anything happens to my sister, you don't
have a chance, you understand?"
I shake his arm off. I know he's afraid and
threatening me is just a show but I don't need his
macho man image right now. "If anything happens to
your sister, none of us have a chance."
When I get out on the porch Scully is pitching to
Matthew and he shags one that careens off the bat in my
direction and I snag it out of the air barehanded.
"You're out!"
He slumps to a stop and I hear Bill booing from behind
me.
Fuck Bill, "Hey Matthew, come here a minute."
I motion for him to follow me over to the car and pop
the truck lid. I grab one of the bags and start
rummaging through it. Scully comes over to see what
I'm looking for. Bill has come down to join Tara on
the lawn.
"You like baseball?"
"Yeah, I play in a league and my Dad takes me to the
Padres' games."
Padres fan, poor kid. I finally find what I'm looking
for, perhaps my prize baseball possession from my
youth. A Ted Williams' autographed baseball. It's in
one of those plastic cases and I hand it to Matthew. I
hear Scully suck in a breath. No Scully, this isn't an
act of resignation; I'm just passing the torch.
I squat down in front of Matthew. "This isn't a ball
to play with okay? This is autographed by the best
hitter baseball ever had; his name was Ted Williams.
You have your dad put it up in your room. You keep
practicing and someday you'll be a great hitter just
like him."
I ruffle his hair and he darts off to show Bill and
Tara the ball. Scully looks at me as I close the
trunk. Ten years from now he'll only be sixteen, she
understands that I'm counting on there being a future
for him to fulfill that dream.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
LAGUNA BEACH, CALIFORNIA
We head up the coast towards LA. Scully seems
withdrawn again. We haven't had much of a conversation
since we left Flagstaff. She told me she called her
mother while she was at Bill's. Probably not a good
idea but it doesn't really matter now, we're going
home. She wanted to know what had transpired in LA.
Nothing much unfortunately. I was really hoping they
had more to take to the Attorney General. What they
filed is a matter of public record which is probably
how it ended up in the paper but unless they can build
a case on the accusations it's just going to be a
footnote in somebody's file. Something else is going
on, I can feel it. Kallenbrunner was too nervous.
This case against the military is just a cover story
for something a lot bigger. Who ever is behind all this
is trying to catch the colonists and their allies at
their own game.
We find a little motel on the beach and indulge
ourselves in some fine seafood. Scully sticks to
conversations about her niece and nephew. In a way it
makes me happy that she can relate to Bill's kids
without the painful memories coming back to haunt her.
Either she's beginning to heal or she's just really
gotten good at hiding it because all I sense in her
tonight is peace.
~*~*~*~*~*~*
Scully and I have walked down to the beach. It's a cool
night for southern California and I hold her hand as we
walk along the surf, the cold water lapping at our
ankles. The moon makes the water sparkle mirroring the
stars above us. We need these little moments of
normalcy to remind us that the rest of the world is
going on about the business of life just fine,
oblivious to the things we know. She stops for a
moment and turns to look out at the surf and I sense
she's got something she needs to get off her chest.
"You didn't have to give Matthew that ball Mulder."
I'm somewhat dumbfounded by her choice of topics. No I
didn't, the point I was trying to make wasn't for
Matthew anyway.
"The ball wasn't for Matthew, it was for your brother."
She turns towards me, realizing that I must know what
she has told Bill.
"I had to tell him something Mulder or he never would
have let you in the house. I don't know how much of it
he believes but I know the events of the past few years
had made him question his earlier opinion of youÖof us.
"He's scared Scully, he thinks he's been a part of the
cover-up and now he doesn't know how to get himself out
or how to protect his family. I know how he feels."
The little worry lines appear on her forehead. I don't
think the idea of her brother being involved in any of
this ever dawned on her. He didn't know it of course
but that doesn't make it any easier to comprehend. She
squeezes my hand and then lets go walking on up the
beach away from me.
Scully loves the sea. I can see it in the way she
inhales the salty air and plays with the sand between
her toes. The sea, from which all live originated is a
therapy for both of us. For Scully it takes her back
to another life, filled with family and carefree
moments I know she cherishes. For me, it is a balm
that sooths my hyper-driven mind. I watch as the wind
whips her hair and I smile when she laughs at me as the
surf splashes up to soak my jeans.
Tomorrow or the next day we head back to DC and the
uncertainty that awaits us there. Right now there is
just the sea, and Scully and my need to chase her into
the moonlit surf.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
While Scully's in the shower the next morning I try to
get in touch with Kallenbrunner. There's no answer at
his desk and I'm told that he didn't report to work
this morning when I call through the switchboard. I
can't raise him on his cell either. The idea dawns on
me that someone could be monitoring his phone and I've
just given away our location. I throw some clothes on
and bang on the bathroom door.
"Scully!" Opening the door as I hear the water shut
off I tell her to get moving, we need to get out of
here.
She steps into the room in a towel with dripping hair
as I busy myself with throwing our stuff into the two
bags we brought in with us last night.
"Mulder? What's going on?"
I look up with my panic face in full bloom. "I can't
get in touch with Kallenbrunner. They may have traced
the calls."
As she heads for her bag and some clothes I step into
the bathroom, splash water on my face and try to get
the little sweaters off my teeth with a quick pass of
the toothbrush. I run my fingers through my hair. The
hell with shaving, Scully will have to live with me
scruffy. I'm trying to take a leak when Scully's back
in the bathroom fully dressed and gathering up her
belongings.
"Pee fast, it's my turn."
There's something disconcerting when you're in the
middle of a nice long pee and somebody tells you to
'hurry up'. I turn my back to her as she fires up the
complimentary hair dryer.
"Forget that, pee and let's go." I nudge her out of
the way to rinse my hands and leave the room.
I throw our bags in the trunk and come back inside;
she's still in the bathroom.
"Scully! What the hell are you doing in there, let's
go!"
I'm sitting in the car with the engine running when she
comes out to join me. Jerking the door open she throws
her toiletry bag in the back seat sits down and slams
the car door. I don't say anything throwing the car in
reverse and pealing out of the parking lot. We ride in
silence as I jump on the interstate. It's not until I
make the turn towards Anaheim and I15 that she
questions my sanity.
"Mulder, where are we going? I thought we were going
to fly back to D.C., LAX is the other way?"
"Vegas."
"Why? We short on cash?"
I give her one of my patented smug smiles. "Scully, if
they heard any of the conversation I had with
Kallenbrunner yesterday, that's where they'll be
expecting us to go. I'm just trying to throw them off
the track. We can fly out of McCarran."
She gets quiet again, glancing over her shoulder
looking for a tail.
"I haven't seen anybody." No government fleet sedans
anyway I think to myself. "Maybe I'm just being my
paranoid self but I didn't like the answers I was
getting when I tried to reach Dave."
She glances away, out her window and then looks
straight ahead out the windshield. "Do you thinkÖ"
"I don't know. God, I hope not. He was nervous about
something though yesterday. He seemed upset that I even
showed up."
"You want me to call and see if I can get us a flight?"
"No, we'll just get what we can, pay cash."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Six hours of desert and a four-hour wait for the flight
we're now seated in the first class section of a flight
bound for D.C. via Cleveland. We weren't flying on the
government's dime and I needed a nap. These first
class seats are like recliners and I intend to use mine
for the next four hours. I managed to change my shirt
and run the razor over my face in a McCarran Airport
bathroom. At least now it doesn't look like Scully is
flying with a tramp. We both picked our way through a
meal while we waited. Food doesn't sit well on a
stomach full of knots. If all goes well, we should be
in D.C. early tomorrow morning. Then what do we do? I
need a drink.
Scully gives me the eye when I ask the flight attendant
for a Scotch but then she orders a glass of wine. I
resist the urge to chug the Scotch, taking a healthy
swig and then swirling the cubes around in the glass.
"What are you thinking about?"
"How is it you always know when I'm thinking about
something?"
"You get quiet, for someone whose never at a loss for
words that's an unmistakable give away. So what are
you thinking about?"
"What the hell we're going to do when that plane lands
in D.C."
"My Mom's, my apartment?" She suggests only because
neither of us can think of anything else.
"Yeah, that'll work." I chug the rest of the Scotch.
The flight attendant comes by and seeing my empty glass
asks if I'd like another one. I stare at the glass in
my hand. I'd like a whole damn bottle actually but I
tell her no and hand her the empty glass.
Wasn't there supposed to be a plan? You know, we fly
back to D.C. and meet up with some collaborator who
whisks us off to some secret location. That's how it
works in the movies. I can't help feeling we've been
had and that what awaits us at the end of this flight
is a nightmare. Maybe we should have stayed where we
were. Maybe I jumped the gun and D.C.'s the last place
we should be headed. I feel Scully's hand on my arm
and look over at her seeking some kind of confirmation
that this is all going to work out.
"Whatever we decide, whatever happens, we're together
Mulder. This is about 'us', don't try to make it about
'you'. Do you understand?"
I take her hand, entwining her fingers with mine and
stretch back into this four hundred eighty two-dollar
seat. I'm gonna get what I paid for.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
WASHINGTON, D.C.
By eight thirty the next morning I know I've made a
huge mistake. When we taxied up to the gate at Dulles
the pilot asked that all passengers remain in their
seats. Four armed MP's came through the door as soon
as it was opened and proceeded to approach us. I
looked at Scully and all she did was grab my hand. The
head goon makes eye contact with me and now there's no
question who there here to see. With the usual
military charm he addresses us.
"Sir, Madam, will you come with us please? We don't
want to make a scene."
No, of course not, the fate of the planet is at stake
here, why make a mountain out of a molehill.
I don't say anything to them or Scully. Letting go of
her hand I rise from my seat, turning around to grab
the small bags we'd stored in the overhead. The
McDonald's coffee and McMuffin I choked down in
Cleveland are threatening to make a second appearance
and I swallow hard to chase away the feeling. I step
back to let Scully out of the seat and we leave the
plane sandwiched between sets of armed guards and the
eyes of a hundred or so passengers upon us. They lead
us through the terminal to a security entrance and then
down a flight of stairs. I've had enough of this
espionage.
"Somebody want to tell me what this is all about?"
"Mulder," Scully touches my arm. "Don't."
"Sir, if you'll just step this way," goon number one
says as he opens a door out onto the tarmac. There's a
military limousine waiting for us just outside the
door."
"If you and the lady will get in the vehicle please."
I shake off Scully's hand. "I'm not getting in any
fucking vehicle until somebody tells me what the hell
is going on!"
Goon number two grabs me by the shoulder and tries to
wrestle me into the car. I get him with a good head
butt but then goon numbers three and four take up where
he left off. As I continue my futile struggle one of
them knees me in the chest and I end up on all fours
gasping for air. Scully, who's now being restrained
can do nothing but watch me make an ass out of myself.
"Sir, if you'll please just get in the vehicle this
will all be cleared up shortly."
Fuck, do I have a choice? I get in the damn car and
Scully climbs in after me. She reaches over to take my
hand again. "Mulder, please, don't make this hard for
us."
I shake her off again and lean forward, dropping my
head into my hands. I want to cry. I want her out of
here. I'm not going back to that fucking brig and I
don't want to die. Scully's hand comes to rest on my
back and she rubs my shoulders. I lean into her
comfort. What the hell have I done?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Before long we're traveling the streets of D. C. This
city was my home for almost fifteen years and yet now I
feel like it has betrayed me. I look out my window
when the car turns onto Pennsylvania Avenue and turn to
look at Scully confused. I mouth 'the White House' and
she shrugs. The next turn brings us into a service
drive and we're cleared through the gate.
A short time later we find ourselves standing in the
secretaryís office outside the Oval Office. There are
a half dozen secret service men dressed in their
government issue dress suits to keep us company making
me feel strangely out of place in my shirt and jeans.
I look over at Scully and see fear in her eyes. Weíve
come a long way to play out this hunch of mine, bound
together by a determination to see that justice and the
rights of the people are not forgotten. The phone
rings and the presidentís secretary picks it up. I hear
her replying softly to the presidentís request and then
she turns to us. In her expression I am suddenly hit
with a wave of emotion. She knows what lies on the
other side of that door and it frightens her. I really
do feel like Daniel walking into the lionís den. But
there is something else there too, a desire to help if
only she knew how.
"The President will see you now Agent Mulder."
One of the president's SS proceeds us to the door and
opens it for us, motioning us to follow him. As we
step into the office I feel the blood drain from my
face. We have company. General Suveg and some of my
'friends' from the brig in their familiar military garb
are also in attendance. Shit.
"Agent Mulder, Agent Scully, please have a seat," the
president motions with his hand for the two of us to
sit in the chairs that have been placed directly in
front of his desk. We walk over to the chairs but
neither one of us makes any attempt to sit. My buddies
come to stand behind us.
What's with the 'Agent' title? I'm almost certain this
man has no clue about what's really going and that he's
just acting out his part here. "No thank you, sir.
Iíd rather stand."
"Weíre all very please youíve decided to turn yourself
in Agent Mulder. Itís going to make it a lot easier to
clean up this very messy situation youíve gotten
yourself in to."
Turn myself in? That's not exactly what I had in mind
but as long as I'm here I might as well lay my cards on
the table. "If youíre referring to the mess you and
your constituents have created behind the backs of the
American people, then yes, thatís why Iím here. You've
violated every right to the office you hold."
He seems taken aback with my accusation. "I have no
idea what you're talking about. I assure you Agent
Mulder, we have only the best interest of the people in
mind."
"Oh you know damn well what Iím talking about only
youíre in it up to your neck just like I am. The only
difference is you have the power to do something about
it."
I sense his anger and his fear as he flashes a glance
over to Suveg. Iím not sure at first if heís asking
him for help here or wishing he hadnít invited him in
the first place. And then the general speaks and I get
my answer.
"Sir, if I may. Agent Mulder is an escaped prisoner.
He broken into a high security facility in order to
obtained information vital to National Security and
killed one of my men. He was sentenced to death for
his crimes. There is no 'mess' to clean up. This man
comes in here spouting off about rights, he has no
rights!"
Scully's had enough. "How dare you speak about rights!
This man is an American citizen just like you Mr.
President. What right was he granted when he was tried
in a court without proper representation?"
"Sir, he was tried by a jury of his peers. Agents of
the Federal government," Suveg says with some
trepidation.
"Heís not an agent of the Federal government. He was
fired. Heís an American citizen and as such he has the
right to a fair trial and proper representation; not
that kangaroo court you pretended to preside over. If
you wish to try him for these 'crimes' you say heís
committed he should be tried in a public court where
the evidence is freely revealed to the public."
Then she glares at Suveg. "Only youíll never do that
because then all that dirty little mess youíre trying
to hide under the rug will be discovered."
Scully is livid. That fire in her blazing to an almost
uncontrollable level and Iím afraid theyíre going to
haul her out of here. I reach over; about to grab her
arm to settle her when I hear guns being cocked, I
almost canít breathe. They could shoot me down right
here, both of us for that matter and it would be all
over. This is NOT why I risked everything to come back
here.
"Sir, if I may speak?" I manage to get out even though
my heart is pounding in my throat. The president says
nothing, but motions me to speak. I sense his desire
to hear what I have to say. I see in his eyes a need
for an answer to a question he hasnít been able to ask.
This man is terrified there is no way out of what he
has gotten himself into.
"Sir, Iíve spent the better part of my lifetime trying
to uncover the truth. And while Iíve been witness to
some incredible and amazing things that exists in this
world, I have also seen the horrific things man can do
to his fellow man. Especially when it comes to the
very people chosen to represent them." He can see in
my eyes that Iím referring to him and it makes him
shudder suddenly.
"Agent Mulder."
"Mr. Mulder, sir. I donít work for the Bureau
anymore."
He glances at Suveg again angrily. "Mr. Mulder, Iím
sure as a 'former' employee of the Federal government
you are well aware that there are times when
information needs to be withheld for reasons of public
safety and national security. And that being an
employee of the government it is your duty to protect
that information.
"And who protects the people sir?"
"We are protecting them by withholding the
information."
"No, youíre protecting yourself."
"What the hell are you talking about. Iím an elected
official. Chosen by the people toÖ"
I donít let him finish. There are probably a hundred
different kinds of surveillance in this room, the
general and his goons are standing behind us but
suddenly I donít care. Somewhere this man has a
conscience and Iím about to appeal to it in a major
way. Iím about to put him in harms way too and I
suddenly canít help wonder if thatís what happened to
KennedyÖhe wouldnít play the game either.
"Chosen by the people to REPRESENT them!" I feel
Scully take my left hand in my outburst, squeezing it
to tell me sheís behind me in whatever Iím about to do.
I squeeze back hard. If she could feel my pulse right
now sheíd be seriously concerned. My heart is racing.
"Elected by the people, sir, to serve and protect them
and this country and instead youíre plotting against
everything this country stands forÖbasic human rights.
You and every other elected leader on this planet have
the obligation to adhere to those rights and none of
you have the right to dictate the fate of the people.
I can see sweat breaking out on the presidentís
reddened face. He doesnít know whether to be angry or
afraid at the direction this conversation has taken.
And heís definitely not ready to concede that what Iím
saying is the truth.
"Mr. Mulder, there is a war raging here, a matter of
national security that you seem to want to ignore."
"Sir, if thereís anyone whoís being ignorant here itís
you. Youíre right, there is a war raging and itís time
you figured out what side youíre on. For some reason
you," I say to him with a determination I didnít know I
had. "And you," I say again nodding to Suveg, "believe
that if you play along with these 'men' youíll still
have some authority in the end. There is nothing to be
gained by an alliance here."
I catch a glimpse of someone standing to my right out
of the corner of my eye. Turning my head in that
directions just slightly I realize itís Krycek and his
words from several years ago come flooding back to me.
"There is only one law, fight or die, resist or serve."
I see the presidentís face pale as he looks toward
Suveg. Neither of them says a word. I turn to the
guards standing behind me.
"And what about these men, do they have any idea what
theyíre protecting? Do they know what the outcome of
this will be, the danger to themselves, their families,
and the future? There is no future. Your alliance
with the devil has pretty much sealed the fate of the
world. What the hell were you thinking?"
I see a concession form on the presidentís face. He
knows what Iím saying is true.
"Think about what youíre throwing away." I say as I
walk over to a copy of the Gettysburg Address that I
spotted hanging on the wall. Itís not patriotism
thatís drawn me to it; itís those voices of the dead
that are speaking. Crying out for recognition and I
suddenly feel the tears forming in my own eyes as I
turn to face the president. My dad, my mother, my
sister, Deep Throat, X, Captain Scully, Melissa, and
Albert; Cassandra Spender, Diana, Krycek, the Gunmen,
and a proliferation of faces I donít recognize are all
standing about the room. I turn back and tap the glass
protecting the document. "Listen to what these people
are telling you sir. Please donít let them have died
in vain."
He knows what Iím talking about, I see tears in his own
eyes as well, moved by the truth of my words and
because he doesnít know how to fix this.
"Arrest this man!" Suveg shouts.
As cuffs are slapped on my wrists I suddenly become
resigned to my fate. I turn away from the president,
back to the document behind me and read those words
Abraham Lincoln penned so many years ago. "ÖIt is
rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task
remaining before us-that from those honored dead we
take increased devotion-to that cause for which they
gave the last full measure of devotion-that we here
highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in
vain-that this nation, under God shall have a new birth
of freedom-and that government of the people, by the
people, for the people shall not perish from the
earth."
Scully comes to stand beside me, I want desperately to
wrap my arms around her, and the tears are now flowing
down both my face and hers.
"They deserve to know the truth Scully, I choke out."
"Who Mulder?"
"The people Scully, they're not free if someone else is
controlling their fate. They deserve that new birth of
freedom."
We donít get a chance to say anything else as Iím
roughly jerked from her side and steered towards the
door. I cast a penetrating glance back at the
president and though I know his lips donít move I
distinctly hear him say, "How do we stop this?"
Shaking the cuffs and glaring back at him I let him
know heís the only one who can make that happen. My
eyes meet Scullyís in one last moment of remorse and
then the door closes and both he and Scully are gone
from my site.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Itís raining hard, big stinging drops that pelt us as
we hustle out the door, Suveg shouting instructions as
two of his goons are wrestling me towards their
government issue limo. Weíre all soaked as we near
the vehicle. One of them lets go of me to get the door
and as he swings it open our eyes meet.
"Iím just doing my job," the young officer says to me
as if heís apologizing.
The guyís terrified for his life in more ways than one.
He can't be any more than twenty-five and probably has
no idea how he happened to draw this assignment. I
canít tell him itís because heís been deemed
'expendable'.
This isn't his fault. I check the name emblazoned on
his uniform, Andrew Shea. "You just keep doing your
job Officer Shea."
Fact is, we're all expendable, the whole fucking
population of the United States, hell the world is,
with the possible exception of a few collaborators who
will find out soon enough that they are no longer
needed either. Somewhere back in the beginning of
all this was the false assumption that these men could
buy their survival in lives. The needs of the few
outweighing the needs of the many. Itís time these men
learned the ugly truth.
The screeching of tires interrupts our silent exchange,
suddenly the drive is filled with government vehicles
and men in black. G.I. Joe turns away from me just as
gunfire erupts around us. I see Suveg go down out of
the corner of my eye, bullets pepper the car and as I
try to dive inside for cover I feel one rip through my
left thigh just above my knee. Shit, not again. What
the hell is going on? Men are running everywhere. I
hear footsteps and shouting. A familiar voice yells
frantically.
"Whereís Mulder?"
Someone opens the car door, "Iíve got him," he yells,
grabbing my leg as I try to scramble away and out the
other door. Pain shoots up my leg taking my breath
away. He grabs my arm, yanking me with him.
"Come on! Weíve got to get out of here!"
I stumble as he pulls me from the car, catching myself
with my other hand when I hit the pavement. I hear
sirens off in the distance, I wish I could tell who the
bad guys are. As Iím being pulled again to my feet a
soft touch and gentle voice answer that question for
me.
"Oh Mulder, come on, weíve got to get out here now."
"Whatís going on?"
"You donít think weíd start the revolution without you
do you?"
A grimacing smile is all I can give her as they half
drag me over to a waiting SUV. I climb in dragging my
injured leg with me and Scully climbs in after me. The
doors are slammed shut and weíre moving before I even
get a chance to catch my breath. Christ, whoever these
men are, theyíve just murdered a general and his
platoon to get me out of there. Iím left to wonder
what happened to the frightened soldier.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Do you have your knife Mulder?"
Why is Scully asking me for my knife? I look at her
dazed and puzzled as I fight for comprehension through
the haze of pain.
"I need to look at your leg Mulder, cut your jeans
away." Her voice is soothing but I see concern in her
eyes. I look down at my blood soaked jeans, fumbling
in my pocket for my knife as we speed through the
streets of D.C. As I hand it to her with bloodied
fingers a voice coming from the front seat startles me
even more.
"How is he?" comes the question in Skinnerís deep
baritone.
My eyes flash to his searching for recognition, a
confirmation that itís really him and not some
replicated version sent to dupe us. Scully senses my
fear and reaches to assure me weíre safe for the moment
and I feel nothing to the contrary.
"Itís okay Mulder, a lot has happened since we left
D.C."
Sheís sitting on the floor in the back seat where she
can get a better look at the damage done to my leg as
she starts to cut whatís left of my pant leg away. My
hands clench at the cloth and I slam my eyes shut in an
attempt to still the urge to cry out. I want to know
what sheís talking about, what happened after I was
hustled out of the Oval Office but all my energy is
focused on controlling the pain.
"I have to lift your leg Mulder, Iím sorry," she says
and she gently lifts my leg at the knee to continue her
work. My back arches and my arms fly out to my sides
at the intensity of the pain. I want something to hold
on to, a bullet to bite on.
"Can you get me a bullet to bit on?" I say with a shaky
voice. She looks up at me, the beginnings of a grin on
her lips but the sadness doesnít leave her eyes. She
probes the wound tenderly.
"ChristÖScully," I hiss out, grabbing her wrist to get
her to stop poking me. She turns to Skinner to answer
his question.
"Heís bleeding badly but I donít see any vascular
damage, just a nasty flesh wound."
"Yeah, and itís just my flesh."
She looks up at me from under her brow; concern mixed
with the smirk I see forming on her lips.
"We need to get him to a hospital or some kind of
medical facility. He needs stitches, something for the
pain and probably a unit of blood."
I squeeze her wrist tightly and she turns back to me.
"No hospital."
I feel nauseated either from the pain or the motion of
the car as we continue to weave our way out of D.C.
She can see it in my expression, in the sweat competing
with the rainwater on my brow.
"Mulder," itís Skinner again, "weíve got a drive ahead
of us, Iím not going to let you bleed to death back
there."
Scully rolls up the part of my pant leg she cut off and
stuffs it under my leg, hoping that the weight of my
leg against it will be enough pressure to slow the
bleeding. She begins to search frantically under the
seats from her awkward position on the floor.
"This is a government vehicle, isnít there anything in
here I can dress this with?"
"Shit, yeah, thereís a kit in the back," our driver
pipes up. I donít recognize the man but evidently
Skinner is confident of his alliance.
Scully is up and climbing over me to get into the back
before I can voice an objection. Sheís trying
desperately to be careful and I use my arms to steady
her. With the first aid kit in hand she settles back
onto the floor to see what she can use. I watch her
rifle through the kit, opening some alcohol wipes to
clean the blood off her hands
"Well I can probably get the bleeding stopped with
these pressure bandages but thereís nothing in here for
pain but some expired Tylenol."
I extend my hand for her to hand them to me; Iíll take
anything I can get right now.
"Thereís nothing to wash them down with Mulder," she
tells me with regret.
"Iíll use spit."
She hands me a packet and I motion for her to hand me a
second one. If theyíre expired itís gonna take more
than two to do any good. Reluctantly handing me
another packet she watches me choke them down on what
little spit I can muster. I let my head fall back
against the armrest and she reaches to check my pulse.
Her hands feel warm against my cooled skin. Iím
beginning to feel chilled and shocky and that I know is
not good. With a frown at what she finds she looks at
me. I know Scully, Iím sorry too. I hear her ask
Skinner for his jacket that she lays across my chest.
"Mulder, I need you to roll onto your right side," she
says as she strokes my cheek. "Iím going to have to
hurt you to wrap it, Iím so sorry."
I start to turn slowly towards the back of the seat.
"No more being sorry, remember?"
"I remember."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
CATOCTIN MOUNTAINS, MARYLAND
I remember waking up with my head in Scullyís lap,
voices and then some men dragging me out of the car,
placing me on a gurney. Pleading with Scully 'no
hospital' and her hand on my forehead reassuring me.
Skinnerís voice advising someone about the gunshot
wound to my leg, Scully giving them my blood type and
another female voice saying sheíd take good care of me.
I remember the rest of my clothes being cut away but
being too incoherent to care, it seems like half the
world has seen me naked by now anyway. Voices giving
orders and stating vitals, a mask over my face and
something cold in my veins and then all went black.
I hear voices now. Someone, I think its Skinner asking
how Iím doing. Scully in a soft voice so as not to
wake me telling him Iím fine.
"Thatís a lie."
I feel her hand thatís been resting on my arm jump.
She turns to look at me startled by my reply to her
answer. She drops her gaze, concentrating on tracing
the veins in the back of my hand.
"We have to stop meeting like this partner."
"Just like old times, huh?"
She doesnít answer me, still refusing to look me in the
eyes. I reach up and brush her hair back from her
face. "Hey, canít be too bad, I still have my leg."
She finally looks up. "God, Mulder, donít even think
that. Yes, you still have your leg and some nice
tapestry work to go with it. How do you feel?"
"Not fine. Kinda dizzy."
She smiles briefly in sympathy. "Thatís probably the
anesthetic. They put you out to sew you up."
"Where are we anyway?"
"Camp David."
My eyes widen in shock. Jesus Christ, Camp David is
under Marine control just like Quantico. Are they
insane? What exactly is going on here? I want to know
everything but I canít keep my eyes open. Even doped
up Scully can see the panic spreading across my face.
"Welcome to the revolution, Mulder," she says with more
conviction than I have heard in her voice in some time.
She wraps her hands around my wrist. "Itís a really
long story and I can see youíre drifting off. Get some
rest. What Iíve got to tell you even you wonít
believe."
She gets up and leans over the bed. Running her
fingers through my hair and kisses me softly.
"I think this is another one of those miracles you told
me to never stop believing in."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Thereís a soft glow in the sky when I wake up alone.
The clock says 7:20 but Iím not sure if itís AM or PM.
Hell, Iím not even sure what month it is. I look
around to get my bearings. Standard hospital-type room
in a very swanky hospital. I try to pull myself up a
little and am reminded by my leg that Iím going to need
some help. Besides that I gotta pee. They might have
stripped me naked but at least they didnít humiliate me
further with a catheter. Iím checking out my options
when Skinner strolls into the room unaware that Iím
awake. He sees me rifling through the covers and
quickens his pace to be of assistance.
"Mulder, what do you need?"
Frustrated I look up. "Somebody better get me a bottle
or theyíre gonna have to change the sheets."
I see his face redden when he realizes what Iím talking
about.
"Iíll get the nurse."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Relief and a dose of pain medication later Skinner is
back in my room. Heís dressed casually, the 'man-in-
black' look gone. I get the impression heís got a lot
to say but doesnít know where to start.
"Whereís Scully?"
He finally looks at me. "Sheís asleep Mulder, sheís
exhausted."
Now that weíre alone I can read him better. This is
the Skinner that defended me in that hokey courtroom.
He knew what a futile cause it was then and yet he
stood by me because he believed in me. They all did
Iíve now come to realize. But things have happened
since then I can tell by his demeanor. He's got a lot
to tell me but he's waiting for me to take the
initiative.
"Good, then you can tell me what the hell is going on."
"Whatís going on is what you started at Mount Weather."
"It all came to an end there. I donít understand."
He comes over to sit in the chair next to the bed,
resting his elbows on his knees and bringing his hands
up to scrub his face. Heís exhausted too. Freedom
never comes without a price.
"The shock wave from that investigation Agent
Kallenbrunner started in LA has reached all the way
back here Mulder. All the leads you gave him. The
information panned out. It was me who cleaned out your
office at the Bureau. All the original files are here.
All your missing evidence was recovered in the raid on
the Pentagon. Thereís going to be a huge Grand Jury
investigation into the military, all the cover-ups and
the government's involvement in them. When this
information gets out to the press the public will know
the truth. It goes all the way up to the president
Mulder and he knows what other leaders are involved."
I donít know whether to be elated or terrified. The
implications of what heís just told me are
astronomical. I think about my fear for what the
truth would do to Scully. I couldnít tell her our fate
had already been determined and now the whole world
will know it.
I realize Skinner is waiting for some reaction from me.
I honestly donít know what to say. I know the
president is a pawn like the rest of us and the people
are going to need someone to restore their faith in the
government.
"The presidentís not one of them, heís a pawn just like
the rest of us. He's only been used to perpetuate the
lie. Implicating him will destroy any faith the public
has." Something else heís said suddenly dawns on me.
"What do you mean you cleaned out my office?"
He doesn't answer my last question. Preferring instead
to let me know I wasn't the only one they rescued from
the White House. "The president is here Mulder." He
looks away from me, getting up to cross the room and
look out the window. The sky is considerably brighter
now and I realize itís AM and I slept all night.
He turns to face me. "Doggett and Reyes came back to
the Bureau after you and Scully left that night. They
had Gibson with them. When they went to down to the
basement office it was empty, down to the bare walls.
Iím sure they thought everything had been confiscated
by bureau personnel but Iíd beaten them to it." He
looks down at his feet, ashamed of what heís about to
admit. "I knew you didnít have a chance in that
courtroom Mulder. If I couldnít save you at least I
could save your work."
Iím overwhelmed with his admission and when he finally
meets my eyes I stumble to express my gratitude. "That
was a huge gamble on your part Sir," is all I can choke
out.
We spend the next hour or so discussing what
information they have and what plans have been
established. Iím shocked to learn that these aliens do
have liabilities, that there is still a need for human
collaboration in their plan for colonization. Itís
much easier for them to grow an alien force right here
on this planet than to transport one here from
elsewhere. But humans are frail creatures, which is
why they needed the Syndicateís help in creating a
better species in which to propagate the invasion
force. Thatís why the implants were needed to track
the abductees and monitor the progress being made.
Those fools within the Syndicate thought they could
outsmart the aliens and stall the date of colonization
by killing Cassandra. The colonists didn't need any
politely worded announcement that a hybrid had been
successfully created, they knew immediately. I think
about the implant Scully still carries in her neck.
Can they still track her with it or did Spender in some
final act of redemption turn it off? I still want to
know how we were followed to New Mexico.
Skinner and Kersh were called on the carpet about their
duplicity in my escape but were allowed to continue
their roles as pawns in this unholy game. Theyíre
needed to keep their unsuspecting subordinates on board
for the final move.
Scully and I have determined that there is more than
one faction of aliens involved here. The colonists
aligned with the military have created this race of
super-soldiers. Designed as assassins, their job is to
destroy any chance the human race has of preventing the
eventual colonization of earth. Theyíre the ones who
are out to get me and her and anyone else who poses a
threat to their plans. Theyíre indestructible or so
they believe.
The magnetite that Scully discovered is our only weapon
against them right now. But luring them to it or
getting it to them is the problem. There is no way to
identify who is the enemy here. There is however,
another party in this scenario, one that could hold the
key to our salvation, another alien race.
There have been incredible leaps in development over
the course of mankindís evolution, baffling scientists
for centuries as to their cause and origin. Scullyís
investigation into the claw we found in Arizona some
years ago proved that we are all in some part 'alien'.
Each one of us possesses the genetic remnants of
another race of beings. This is not information we
should fear. It is instead a revelation of the unity
of the entire universe. Further proof that we are not
only one species here on earth but genetically related
to whoever else inhabits the universe. We are not
alone.
It is within these genetic remnants that the key to our
survival may be found. Found in the gifted few that
through some quirk of fate of perhaps the hand of God
find themselves with abilities far beyond what we
believe are humanly possible. It is unclear why or how
these genes became dormant in some of us or why in some
of us they remain active. This is what I tried to get
an assembly of agents and Skinner himself to
understand. This is the key to the X-Files. The proof
of everything we can't or won't explain lies in these
genetic codes.
Gibson, my brave young friend is one of these gifted
individuals. His ability to read minds allows him to
communicate with the aliens and also to identify those
who plot against us. I believe William is also gifted.
We cannot however, bring children into this war. We
need to find a better way to identify our enemy, to
understand how these alien races are connected and as
the president pleaded with me as I was dragged from his
office, find a way to stop this.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Skinner must think I've zoned out on him. The gentle
pressure of his hand on my leg brings me back to the
present. I think about what he's said. Is revealing
the cover-up of plans for alien colonization to the
world really a good idea? For years this is all I had
wanted and then when I knew it to be true I couldn't
even speak it myself. We have to be very careful about
what is revealed because it has to be backed up with
irrefutable evidence.
Despite how much I want the truth to win out we need to
be extremely careful. "Look, this is a great idea, but
the Grand Jury could be just as much a part of the
cover-up as the military is. They would make a mockery
out of the judicial system. We could end up putting all
the evidence right back in their hands. How can we be
sure who weíre dealing with?"
Skinner sighs. "Thatís just it Mulder, we canít. We
have to find a way to identify them. If we can do
that, along with Scullyís research, we have a chance to
defeat them."
This sounds too much like the McCarthy hearings. "I
wonít bring Gibson into this."
"No oneís asking you too. There's another way." He
looks away from me, mulling over something in his mind
that heís not sure Iím ready to hear at the moment
"What other way? I don't understand what youíre
getting at."
"You."
'Me' I think to myself, how can Skinner possibly think
that I can help identify the enemy. "I canít read
minds, I told you that, not anymore. Where did you get
this idea?" I finish with a laugh. Heís beginning to
aggravate me and he can see that my patience is
beginning to run thin. He draws a manila folder from
his coat.
"I have to show you something that might change you
mind," with some hesitation he continues. Handing me
three clear plastic sheets heís withdrawn from the
envelope.
"These are PCR results. These two," he says as he puts
the top two sheets together, "are from the nail you and
Scully found in Arizona and Gibson Praise. These
markers," he explains, pointing to several of the
stains, "are not genetic codes normally found in human
DNA, they match."
"I know all this, Scully and I have this information,"
I say impatiently.
"This one," he continues as he lines up the third
sheet, " is yours. Scully did this whenÖwhen we dug
you up, it also matches. Do you understand the
implication here Mulder?"
I sit and stare at the results in front of me. Yeah, I
understand perfectly. Itís like Iíve been trying to
tell Scully, Iím not who I was. Finally able to find
my voice I look up at him.
"Scully knew this? She ran tests on the baby. Why
didnít she say anything to me?"
"Maybe because she was afraid of what the information
means. Or what you would do with it if you knew. I
told you before; she canít lose you again Mulder.
Whatever her reasons, she knows. The truth youíve been
searching for, itís in you but sheís not going to let
you die to prove it."
He finishes by staring into me. I read him loud and
clear.
I have this sudden flash of Diana leaning over me
saying almost those exact words not long ago. She had
something else on her mind then and it terrified me, as
I lay there unable to do anything to save myself.
Little did I know then how truthful her words would
turn out to be? I look down at the sheets in my hands
still not totally comprehending what Iíve been shown.
This gift Skinner tells me I have, is it whatís guided
me all along? Given me the ability to empathize with
victims, allowed me access to the minds of killers and
provided those leaps of logic that too others seemed
'spooky'? If thatís the case, then this has always
been a part of me. My head hurts with confusion.
"Can I keep these for a while?"
Skinnerís not sure telling me all this was a good idea
now. He hesitates for a moment at my request. Finally
acknowledging when he realizes that I want to discuss
this with Scully.
"Yeah, sure. Mulder. You know this doesnít make you
aÖ" he looks at me sympathetically.
"Freak," I say finishing his thought for him. "Not any
more than my son, huh?"
He doesnít deny thatís what he was thinking.
"Iíll talk to you later," he says as he walks from the
room. Leaving me to face a truth Iíd often thought
about but was always afraid to admit, even to myself.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
They must have a heck of a satellite system here
judging from the selection Iím finding on the TV. Iím
surfing stations when Scully walks in the room carrying
a duffel bag. Iím also guessing itís warm outside.
Sheís dressed in a tank top and khaki slacks, her hair
tied back. She heads my way, dropping the bag at the
end of the bed and nailing me with a good morning kiss.
"Morning, Mulder."
"Morning yourself. Sleeping without me does you good."
I meant that as a compliment but she seems taken aback
with my comment.
She grabs my hand. "I donít ever want to be without
you," she says quietly, looking down at our joined
hands. "How do you feel?"
"High as a kite actually. A little dopey."
She resists the urge to make a comment and leans over
the end of the bed, grabbing the chart hanging there.
"They still have you on Demerol? Are you in that much
pain?"
She came in her all bubbly and bright and Iíve already
succeeded in dampening her mood. I just want to get
the hell out of here so I give her a cocky answer.
"How would I know? Whatís in the bag?"
She smiles, rolling her eyes with exasperation.
"Clothes, want to get out of here?"
"Are you serious?"
"IímÖweíre in a private cottage, what difference does
it make where you lay around."
She reaches to unzip the bag sheís brought with her,
suddenly eyeing the envelope still resting on the bed
where Skinner left it.
"Whatís this?"
I meet her eyes. "Maybe you can tell me."
She eyes me suspiciously, opening the envelope and
withdrawing the charts.
"These look like PCR results."
"Yep, they are. I understand you know all about them."
She stands there comparing them in silence. Iím trying
desperately not to sound like Iím calling her on this.
But sensing her reluctance to address the situation Iím
beginning to wonder what else she knows. Realization
dawns across her face.
"Iím not who I was am I?"
"Mulder? Who gave you these?" Sheís cautious now.
Not wanting to give up the game she has so cleverly
manipulated to keep me in the dark.
"Skinner, they think I can help them identify the
aliens. You didnít answer my question."
Anger, fear, I feel them start to come off her in
waves. She slams the sheets down on the bedside table.
"Damnit Mulder, stop saying that!"
"You just wonít admit what I am because then it means
that William is the same thing and you gave birth to
him!" I canít hold my anger in either. I thought we
were though lying to each other.
"Donít you even think that!"
The slap I get is not surprising but Iím quick enough
to grab her wrist before she can pull away. She yanks
back hard enough to almost pull me out of bed and I
have to let her go.
"Youíre not some fucking alien Mulder and neither is
our son!" Suddenly all the fight goes out of her.
"Heís just a baby, an innocent little baby."
The expletive surprises me but the tears do not. Sheís
backing away from me as I start to climb out of the
bed. I realize sheís about to flee when she turns
quickly for the door. As soon as I hit the floor I
know why they had me on Demerol. Pain shoots up my leg
but I refuse to let her escape. Somehow I beat her to
the door, my IV pole crashing to the floor in the
process. I hear footsteps in the hall and slam the
door shut throwing my weight against it and turning
around to face her. She's standing in front of me,
bewildered and upset by this whole event. I try to
reach out to her, blood running down the back of my
hand from where the IV line was ripped out but she
flinches away from me.
"ScullyÖIÖI just want an explanation. PleaseÖI just
want to know whatís happened to me."
She doesnít say anything; weíre just staring intently
at each other when thereís someone pounding on the
door, pushing against me as I try to hold it shut.
"Tell them itís okay Scully," I plead with her.
Panting through the pain, perspiration starting to bead
my forehead.
She sighs, her brows furrowing, a look of defeat
crossing her face. "Weíre okayÖcan you just give us a
minute?"
I open the door a crack to an insistent looking nurse.
Sheís surprised to see me standing there.
"We need a minute here, please."
I see her glance back up the hall like she's looking to
someone else for help. But then she acknowledges my
request turning away without comment. I close the door
again and turn back to Scully trying not to put any
weight on my leg I lean on the door for support. I
really need to sit down.
She steps toward me, taking my bloody hand in one of
her shaky ones. "Mulder, look what youíve done to your
hand," she looks up finally meeting my eyes. "Letís
get you back to bed."
We stager across the room like a couple of drunks and
she unceremoniously plops me back on the bed.
Returning from the bathroom a minute later with a basin
and washcloth to clean off my hand. I watch her as she
gently dabs away the blood, removing the rest of the
tape and pressing the cloth against the wound to stop
the bleeding. I have to break this silence.
"Those are the abnormalities you were talking about in
Arizona arenít they? I didnít understand how you could
just let that comment go without an explanation. Tell
me what it means."
I watch her run her tongue across her teeth; she wonít
look at me now. Sheís debating how to approach this.
Confusion, disbelief, denial and a little fear all
fighting for control. I feel the same way Scully, talk
to me.
She struggles to put the words together. I reach for
her, bring her hands to my lap, holding them there.
"Talk to me." I say to her quietly.
She sighs like she's dealing with a petulant child.
"Mulder you suspected this. It's why you asked for
Kritschgau, to help you prove that what had happened to
you was alien in nature."
"I wanted you to prove it Scully."
She looks away from me again and I touch her chin with
my finger drawing her gaze back to me. "You didn't
fail me Scully."
"Mulder, this is all my fault. When I came back from
Africa, Kritschgau stole my files. He sent them to the
National Institute of Health for evaluation. All your
personal medical files, proof of what you suspected.
Even if they didn't believe what was in them, the
information was out there for anyone to see. I thought
I had deleted them but someone killed him for those
files."
Krycek I think to myself. If she'd been there instead
of Kritschgau would she have believed what her science
told her about me? Do I believe it? Like she says,
the information is out there now, obviously of interest
to the people here and making me a prime target of the
colonists. Everybody has a bounty on my head. None of
that matters now. What I need to know is how she feels
about all this. I squeeze her hand again.
"So what did you find? What did your science tell
you?"
She looks down again at our joined hands. "You
remember what I found out about the nail we discovered
in that house and how it related to GibsonÖto all of
us?" Her voice is soft, almost like she's still
refusing to believe what her science was telling her.
"When I saw the abnormalities in your scans it reminded
me of what we had seen in Gibson's tests. I went back
and checked Gibsonís file thatís how I found it.
William has then too."
"But you said we all have these dormant genes."
"We do, but remember I told you that in Gibson they
were turned on?"
"You canít just turn genes on