Bennie

By Susan
susanf34@comcast.net


Classification: vignette
Spoiler: Requiem
Rating: G
Archive: No archive without permission.
Disclaimer: One character is mine. The other
isn't. Is that good enough for you?;)

Author's notes at the end.

Summary: His emotions are everywhere,
and so are mine.
***************************************************

Bennie
by Susan
~~~~

They're coming today.

I don't know when they're due to arrive or how
they're going to be dropped off, but they're
coming, and I have a lot to do to get ready.

Of course, everyone else around here will be
doing a lot to get ready too, but I'm especially
busy because he's coming.

I wonder if he'll talk to me when he gets here.

I hope so.

~~~~

I've been doing some reading, preparing myself
for what I might be able to talk with him about.

From what I've read, he's very intelligent.

Will he want to talk about books when he gets
here?

I've read a lot of books since I've been here,
and I have a lot to say about them. Maybe if I
get a chance, I'll tell him about my favorite
one.

He probably won't want to say much though,
especially if he's taken to the Circle Room.

I don't like that room.

No one ever wants to talk after being there,
and everyone always leaves there looking
different than when they went in.

I hope he doesn't have to go there.

~~~~

I call myself Bennie.

Everyone else here has a name too, but they put
numbers after their names like Jack13 and Tim25.

I'm just Bennie.

I'm also different because I'm able to feel
things the others can't.

Sometimes it's hard being made this way, but
most of the time I like it because it helps me
understand them better.

I wonder if it'll help me when he gets here.

~~~~

The first group just arrived, and things are
really busy now.

Some of them are immediately sent to the Circle
Room. Some are taken to their own rooms, and the
rest are in the Holding Area with me.

I like being with them here because it gives me
a chance to study them in a way that's so much
better than reading a book.

They're strange creatures, these humans, and
their minds are filled with information that
fascinates me.

How can they possibly deal with all the thoughts
they have running through their brains?

But more importantly, how can we use those
thoughts to make ourselves better?

~~~~

It's been several hours since the first group
came, and I'm beginning to worry.

Maybe he won't be coming tonight after all.

Maybe the second mission failed, and I'll have
to wait even longer to see him, or maybe they're
gathering more passengers than they planned on.

Whatever is happening, I hope I find out about
it soon.

Having to be Patient is a feeling I'm not sure
I like very much.

~~~~

He's here. He's really here.

All this time, we've wondered about him, about
how his mind works, about what secrets his body
holds, and now he's here.

He's taller than I thought he'd be.

I can't wait to read his mind when he's awake.

~~~~

It's been two hours since he was brought to the
Holding Area, and though I've arranged for all
the others to be brought to their rooms, I
wanted to keep him here with me.

It's been quite incredible, really.

Having him here alone with me to study, to feel.

His emotions are everywhere, and so are mine.

Touching him, feeling his losses, seeing all the
scars he carries around inside him has been
almost too much for me, and yet I find myself
unable to turn him over to the others yet.

How is it possible for a man to endure so much
pain for so long?

I have to know.

~~~~

"You have to send him to the Circle Room now,
Bennie," says Jake24, wheeling in the cart next
to his bed. "They're waiting for him."

"I'm not ready yet," I reply, protectively
moving closer to his bed. "I need more time."

"You've had him long enough. You know the rules,
Bennie. They're only supposed to stay in the
Holding Area long enough for you to do a brain
and body scan."

"I know. It's just that..." I stutter, trying
to think of an excuse to keep him here with me
longer.

"It's just that what?" asks Jake24, his eyes
turning darker as he impatiently taps his foot
against one of the wheels on the cart.

"It's just that I'm having a hard time getting
a read on him. He's got more information to
process than the others, and I haven't gathered
it all yet," I reply.

"Well, hurry up. You know they like to move
everyone through the Circle Room as quickly as
possible."

"I know, but give me a few more minutes, okay?"

"Okay. Five minutes, Bennie, but no more."

I've got five minutes. Five minutes until he's
taken to the Circle Room and has his body turned
into something that will be unrecognizable.

It's not much time, but I'll use it the best way
I can.

~~~~

"Agent Mulder, can you hear me?" I ask, leaning
over him and pressing my hand to his forehead.

I notice several small creases there...I think
they call them worry lines...and I immediately
wipe them away with my finger.

"Agent Mulder," I say again, taking note of how
different the hair on his head feels than my
own and of the rough dark stubble on his chin.

His eyelids flutter at the sound of my voice,
and I take a step back, watching in amazement
as he slowly opens his eyes.

"Do you know where you are, Agent Mulder?" I ask
excitedly.

"Scul...ly..." he whispers, turning his head and
trying to look at me.

The name confuses me for a moment, and then I
remember. She's his partner. The one person he
trusts more than anyone.

The one person he feels with both his heart and
mind.

And the only person who can save him.

"I'm not Scully," I say, watching the hopeful
look in his eyes quickly turn to disappointment.

"Who are you?" he rasps.

I know I'm not supposed to tell him anything
about who I am or what we do here, but I also
know what Honesty is, and I want to try it.

"I'm Bennie. My name is Bennie," I reply.

~~~~

His eyes closed again, I sit by his side with
my hand on his arm.

He's too weak to talk with me the way I want him
to now, but I can still feel what he thinks, what
he dreams, what he hopes, and I eagerly absorb
as much of it as I can.

In just a few short minutes, he will leave the
Holding Area and go to the Circle Room, and
though I know I'll see him again later, he won't
be the same when I do.

And neither will I.

~~~~

"Take it easy with him," I say as Jake24 roughly
drags his lifeless body onto the cart and slides
his wrists and ankles into the straps.

"What does it matter? He can't feel anything,"
replies Jake24, tightening the last strap and
wheeling him towards the door.

"You're wrong," I whisper as I watch them leave
the room, then carefully pull out the small gold
necklace I took from his neck when he first got
here. "He feels everything."


~end~

This idea of a clone watching over Mulder and
caring about him took hold of me the other day
and wouldn't let go until it was written, and
even now that the story's done, I still can't
stop thinking about it. It is my hope that it
stays in your thoughts as well.:)

Thanks for reading.

Susan
susanf34@comcast.net

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