by Laura Castellano
laurita_castellano@yahoo.com
 

Rated PG

MSR, MT, Angst

Standard disclaimer:These characters belong to Chris Carter and 1013
productions.

Summary: In losing his Present, Mulder receives comfort
from his Past.

Archive:  Sure, be my guest.
 
 
 
 

"She's still alive!"  Mulder turned his partner over and watched her
eyelids flutter as he pulled her head into his lap.  He leaned over,
shielding her face from the falling rain as best he could.

He didn't even notice the blood seeping from his left bicep.

Pulling off his sweater and pressing it to her wound, his expression
conveying his apology when she hissed with the pain.

"Stay with me--Mulder?"  Her hopeful blue eyes, looking up at him,
were clouded.

"I'm not going anywhere, Partner.  I'd appreciate it if you'd return
the favor."

She shook her head slightly, wincing at the pain even that slight
movement cost her.

"...never make promises--I--can't keep..."

Mulder brushed at the wetness on her cheek, a combination of rain and
tears.

"This rain--is really bad--for my--new cut."

Mulder smiled sadly down at her in spite of his sorrow.  She'd been so
proud of her new haircut...

-----

"Morning, Mulder!"

"Morning," he replied, not looking up from the file he was studying.

"Well?"

Her tone indicated she wanted--no, demanded--his attention, so he made
himself meet her eyes.  Then, drawing back his gaze to take in the
whole of her as she twirled around in a parody of a supermodel, he
smiled.

"New haircut?"

She winked.  "You are the only man I know who gets these things right
on the first try. Most of them go through a whole litany of guesses
before accidentally hitting on the correct one."

"It's my legendary profiling skills.  So what's the occasion?"

"Isn't one.  I just felt like a change."

"Looks nice.  Did you get a chance to look over those notes on the
Jacobi case I gave you last night?"

-----

Mulder was hardly aware of his own injury until he saw the blood,
dripping from his arm onto her impromptu bandage, mingling with the
redness that seeped from her chest.  He was dimly aware of Scully
fussing over him, trying to staunch his bleeding.

"Hey, Covalina.  Looks like we have a blood pact going. You know what
that means.  We have to swear an oath, quick."

"Can I--pick?"

"Hell no.  I'm the senior partner, I'll pick.  That means you have to
promise not to die on me."

She smiled, and he traced the outline of her lips with one finger,
knowing he'd probably never get to see that smile again.

"You're so--predictable."

"I prefer to think of myself as steadfast."

"Something I--wanna tell you."

"Don't try..."

"Don't stop--me this time, Mulder.  I have nothing--to lose--now."
She forced her eyes open wide, made them meet his.  "I--love you."

He hesitated only slightly before answering.

"I love you too, Covalina."  And he did--only not in the way she
desired.  And what could it hurt to make her happy?  After all, he had
nothing to lose, either. He'd seen enough wounds like this to know her
chances of survival were slim.

"Don't I--wish..."

-----

"Gina...no."  He spoke quietly but firmly, and oddly enough, his
respect for her grew when she immediately backed away and looked
contrite.

"I was afraid you'd feel that way," she admitted.  "Just hoped I was
wrong.  I'm sorry, Mulder.  I hope it doesn't have to affect our
working relationship.  Hey, you're not going to haul me up on sexual
harassment charges, are you?"

"Well," he appeared to consider the possibility. "I'll let it pass
this time.  As long as you promise never to let it happen again."

"Done." She held up her right hand, as if swearing to testify in
court.  "I, Gina Covalina, do hereby promise never to annoy you with
my unwelcome advances again."

He couldn't help drawing her to him for a quick hug.

"How can it be annoying to be told someone you like and admire wants
you?" he asked her quietly.  "It's very--flattering, Gina, but I
just..."

"I know.  And I'm okay with it.  Well," she shrugged one shoulder, "as
okay as it's possible to be.  Just don't forget me if you ever decide
you're over Scully."

Her eyes wandered to the picture of his former partner that he kept on
his desk.  Beautiful blue eyes stared back at her, eyes that could
pierce the soul even through a photograph.  She had no trouble
understanding why Mulder still loved her. Dana Scully had the kind of
eyes you didn't forget.

"Gina--" he began, and his voice must have betrayed his emotion.

She held up a hand to stop him.  "Don't even go there, Mulder.  I
don't want to hear one word about your feelings of guilt.  I'm happy
working with you.  You're the best partner I've ever had. And as long
as you've got my back, I'll be fine."

"Now *that* I can promise."

She made as if to leave, and he grabbed her hand, turning her back to
face him.

"I just want you to know that you're a great partner as well.  I'm
lucky to have you.  I feel safe and confident with you working at my
side."

Her grin grew even broader, and he wondered for a second if she was
hiding her tears behind it.  Almost instantly, he realized she was
not.  Gina didn't hide her emotions--ever.  If she wanted to cry,
she'd cry. If she was smiling, it was because she meant exactly what
she said.  It was refreshing to be able to take his partner's words at
face value.  And the really scary thing was that they were so damn
compatible. They thought alike, they reacted alike, they even liked
the same food and movies.  Oh yes, it was refreshing. Refreshing, but
somewhat odd.  And not right.

Not right at all.

"I'll see you tomorrow then, bright and early and ready to take on the
aliens." Her jaunty wave trailed her around the corner and out of
sight.

"Later, Covalina."  He shut the door and turned, leaning against it,
his eyes drawn to the same photo that Gina had studied so intently.

"Scully."  He didn't even realize he was whispering to himself.  He
thought the words were only in his mind. "Where the hell are you?"

-----

"Sir, could I ask you to step back."  Scully's forceful voice cut
through the crowd.  "Mom, can you move them back?  I need room to
work."

Mulder heard Maggie Scully speaking in what he considered to be the
perfect Navy-widow's tone.  "All right, folks. I know you're curious,
but you're going to have to back off and give the doctor some room..."

"Vultures," he muttered.  "Ouch!"

"Sorry, Mulder."  Scully finished tying off the makeshift bandage
she'd put on his arm.  He looked down at his partner and saw her
eyes fluttering again.

"You still with me, Covalina?" he asked urgently.  Her breathing was
becoming more labored with every passing moment, and the rattling
sound from her lungs was almost too much to bear.

"Still here," she breathed.  "Nosy--people everywhere, aren't
there--Mulder?"

"Ain't that the damn truth."

-----

"So why did she leave him?" Agent Stonecypher asked.  "I met them
about a year ago, when I was still partnered with Kinsley. He seemed
pretty irresponsible."

"He's not at all," Covalina protested, dipping a fry into some
ketchup.  She eyed Stonecypher's salad with a feeling of slight
contempt and bit blissfully into the greasy potato.  "He's definitely an
individual thinker, but nobody could call Mulder irresponsible."

"So why did she go?"  Stonecypher, recently transferred to the DC
area, was hungry for gossip, and the memory of Agents Mulder and
Scully and the trouble Mulder had managed to cause for them was still
vivid.

Covalina shrugged.  "Guess she found something she liked better."

She knew why Scully had left Mulder, or at least had a pretty good
idea, from things he'd said and things she'd accidentally overheard.
There had been another agent, a woman from Mulder's past--both his
professional and his personal past, she guessed.  When that agent had
resurfaced in Mulder's life, tensions had begun running high, until
apparently Scully hadn't been able to take it any longer.  She'd given
her notice without informing Mulder, and had only told him on her last
day in the X-Files office.

Mulder, being Mulder, had pretended it didn't tear out his heart to
have her go.  He hadn't asked questions, hadn't offered explanations
or apologies, (if he even had anything to apologize for--Covalina
still wasn't clear on that), and had let her go off to parts unknown
without him.  Parts *very* unknown, meaning as of this day, Mulder had
no idea where Scully was living or working.  If you asked him, he'd
say he didn't care.  He'd be lying and everyone would know it, but no
one would force the issue.

Covalina wasn't about to tell Agent Stonecypher any of this.  She'd
only consented to share her table in the cafeteria with the blonde woman
because there hadn't been any others available.  When Stonecypher had
discovered she was Mulder's new partner, the questions had begun.

"There has to be more to the story than that!" Stonecypher objected,
but Gina didn't give her a chance to pry further.

"Listen, Agent Stonecypher, it's been great getting to know you," she
said, standing and gathering up the remains of her lunch.  "I'm
planning to cut out a little early this afternoon to run some errands,
so I owe the Bureau half of my lunch break.  Let's do this again
sometime?"  She didn't even wait for an answer.  There was no way in
hell she would give that nosy woman the time of day in the future,
much less more fodder about Mulder and Scully for the rumor mill.

She was so irritated that she practically pitched her tray through the
window that led into the kitchen.

"Sorry, Frank," she apologized as the tall man behind the counter
caught her dirty tray.

"Take it easy, Covalina," he growled, trying and failing to hide his
sweet nature with a gruff exterior.  "My health insurance ain't as
good as yours."

She winked at him and returned to the basement office.

Mulder wasn't there, and she took the opportunity to wander the room,
examining thoroughly all the interesting odds and ends that made it
such a fascinating place to work.  That and Mulder, she mentally
amended.  He was the real attraction.  The way his mind worked, the
way he made great leaps of logic that made perfect sense to everyone
else in retrospect, the way the pants of his Armani suits draped over
that perfect ass...

"Stop it!" she said aloud to herself.  "Not on Bureau time."

"Fantasizing about me again?" said a voice from the door, and she
turned with a gasp.

Mulder took one look at his partner's flaming face and groaned. "I'm
sorry, Covalina.  I really didn't think--I mean--it was just something
to say."

His mortified expression wrung a laugh from her in spite of her own
embarrassment.  "And you men think you're the only ones who spend
your days fantasizing about the opposite sex," she teased.

She held out a few yellow pages torn from a legal pad.  "These are my
thoughts on the Jacobi case.  Just a few things I jotted down at
lunchtime before I was invaded by a ghost from your past.  Remember an
Agent Stonecypher, Mulder?"

"She's dead?" His face brightened considerably.

"Mulder!"

"Well you said she was a ghost."

Covalina rolled her eyes and sighed.  "I almost wish she was.  Someone
probably pointed me out to her.  All she wanted was all the gossip,
liberally laced with poisonous suppositions, no doubt."

"What did you tell her?"  His face was carefully guarded.

"That I had to leave because I was cutting out of work early.  When
are you going to learn to trust me?"

Mulder didn't answer.  He took the pages she offered and scanned them.
"Interesting," he murmured, reading his partner's conclusions on the
case.  "I didn't think of that angle."

"You'd probably have to be a woman to think along those lines."

"And you were just telling me that men and women aren't all that
different."

"There are huge differences, and if you haven't figured them out for
yourself, don't look to me for help," she informed him.  "I'm off
for the afternoon, unless you need me.  There's shopping to be done."

He grinned, sinking comfortably into his chair.  "You are the only
professional shopper I know, Covalina."

"Nah.  Most people just aren't as enthusiastic about sharing that part
of their personality as I am."

"Just don't ever expect me to hit the malls with you and we can remain
friends till the end."

"I'll see you on Monday, Mulder."

She was halfway out the door when he stopped her.

"Gina?"

Covalina turned.

"I do trust you," he said, and his voice was quiet and earnest. "If I
have a problem at times--well, it's *my* problem.  Not yours.  I know
you'd never betray me."

She nodded, suddenly unable to speak, and closed the door quickly
behind her.

-----

"What the hell were you doing here anyway, Covalina?" he asked, trying
to keep her alive with small talk.  There was a chance, just a chance
that if those damned paramedics would get their asses here, she could
still be saved.

"Needed new--shoes to go--with the--'do."

He sighed in mock aggravation.

"Covalina...you are such a girl."

She gave a short laugh that turned into a gasp of pain, and he
tightened his grip on her as if to keep her grounded.

"Glad--you--noticed."

-----

Shopping always cheered her up, and after her encounter with Agent
Stonecypher, she was feeling depressed.  It wasn't enough
that she had fallen for her partner after a few short weeks of working
with him.  Now she had other agents probing her for the
dirt on Mulder and Scully.

Scully.  She couldn't help comparing herself to the woman who still
held Mulder's heart in a firm grasp. She knew their parting had been
less than congenial, and that the trouble had centered around an Agent
Fowley.  Beyond that, everything she thought she knew was really just
supposition.  Mulder hadn't volunteered further information, and she
hadn't asked.

It didn't really matter, anyway.  It didn't take a romance novelist to
see that he still pined after Dana Scully, and probably always would.
One had only to look at his eyes when he mentioned her, the way they
softened and took on a sad, accepting expression.

Shaking off those thoughts, Covalina parked her car outside her
favorite shoe store and made her way inside. There wouldn't be a crowd
at this time of the afternoon, and she was planning to browse
the shelves to her heart's content.

She was trying on a pair of spike-heeled boots, wondering how Mulder
would like them, when she heard them in the next aisle.

"Dana, I just don't see why you can't at least call him. I'm sure he
misses you.  I know you've been miserable for the past eight months."

"I'm not miserable, Mom.  I love my new job."

"I know you do.  I didn't say you were unhappy with your work."

"Mom," the younger woman sighed in exasperation.  "Just leave it,
okay?  Anything Mulder and I once had is over. It's best to leave the
past in the past."

Gina froze, one boot half on and half off.  She listened for further
conversation, but at that point the discussion turned back to shoes.

She knew Mulder hadn't made any real effort to locate Scully after her
departure.  Gina had assumed, after getting to know him, that it was
his pride that held him back.

'Besides, what was there to say?' she could almost hear him ask.  'She
chose to leave.  She didn't want to work with me anymore.'

Shoving her foot back into her own slightly scuffed black pump, she
left the store, confirming with a quick glance as she passed the two
women in the next aisle that it was, in fact, Dana Scully shopping not
ten feet away from her.  Gina had seen her photo often enough to recognize
her instantly.

She ran to her car, dodging the rain that had begun to fall.  Pulled
out her cell phone.  Dialed Mulder's office with a trembling hand.
Forced herself to steady her voice, to consider her words.

"Mulder!" she said when he answered, her voice artificially bright. "You
won't
believe what's happened to me!"

"Yeah, what's up?"

"Not my tire.  It's flat."

There was a few seconds' pause.  "You're a liberated woman, Covalina.
Change it."

She pretended to pout, putting all her efforts into what her mother
had always called the 'dumb blond act.'  "Use it, sweetie," her mom
would say, winking at her daughter.  "You'll be surprised at the way
men fall all over themselves to help you out of a jam.  They love to
think of a woman as weak and helpless.  You might as well use that
knowledge to your advantage."

"I can't change it, Mulder, it's raining outside!  It'll ruin my
outfit!"

"Don't try that on me, Covalina."

Damn.

"I'm not kidding, Mulder.  If I wreck this dress, it'll take me ages
to save up enough to replace it.  Come on, I need you.  Besides, I'll
buy you dinner if you help me out."

She could almost hear him rolling his eyes.

"All right," he succumbed at last, and she gave her mother a silent
thumbs-up.  "Where are you?"

"I'll wait inside," she said after hurriedly giving him the name and
address of the store.

She'd kept an eye on the front door and knew Scully and her mother
hadn't left yet--if necessary she could always strike up a
meaningless, friendly conversation to keep Scully there until Mulder
arrived.

She didn't let herself think about the consequences of her actions--
for instance, whether or not Mulder and Scully would actually want to
see one
another.  From the brief conversation she'd overheard, Gina would bet
Scully *needed* to see Mulder...and she knew for a fact that Mulder
needed to see Scully.

Sometimes, you just had to take the world into your own hands.

Gina had only been browsing the sandals for seconds when she heard the
front door jingle.  She knew it couldn't be Mulder already, but she
couldn't help peering around the corner of the shelf out of simple
curiosity.  What she saw made her freeze.

Two young men wearing grungy clothes and sporting long, scraggly hair
had entered the store.  The taller of the two was pointing a gun at
the clerk behind the register, who stared back at him in shock.  The
other had begun scanning the aisles between the tall shelves for
customers.

"Get over here, put your hands up," he ordered Gina at once.

Unable to reach her own weapon without endangering the others, she
obeyed, slowly raising her hands to shoulder level and moving beside
the clerk.

"Is there anyone working in the back?" Gina managed to whisper to the
sales clerk.  A frightened shake of the head was her only answer.

It didn't take long for the men to round up everybody in the store.
When they were all standing against the wall behind the counter--Gina,
the clerk, Scully and her mom and a young mother with two small
children--the second man flipped the sign on the front door to
announce that the store was now "Closed."

-----

Mulder parked his car next to Covalina's and got out, walking all
around her car.  There was no sign of a flat tire.

"What the hell is she up to?" he muttered to himself as he approached
the establishment's front door.

He was at least ten feet away when he saw the "Closed" sign.

Closed on a Friday afternoon?

Just below it was another sign listing the store's operating hours.
According to that information, the store would be open until nine that
evening.

The rain had slowed to a drizzle, but the sky had grown much darker,
and the inside of the store was brightly illuminated. Mulder couldn't
see anyone, but he trusted his instincts.

Something just didn't smell right.

He slipped his hand beneath his suit jacket and unfastened the snap on
his holster.  Edging closer to the glass door, he peered inside, but
because of the placement of the front counter, was unable to see anything
amiss.

With a shrug, he tried the door and was surprised to find it unlocked.

Everything happened so quickly, Mulder was hard-pressed later to tell what
had occurred at all.  The bell on the door jingled to announce his
arrival, and before he could even cross the threshold, Gina came running
toward him.  There were two loud reports, and she suddenly fell hard
against him, the force pushing them both back onto the sidewalk.

Mulder lay on the wet pavement, Gina's body slumped heavily over him,
and stared up at the guy who had shot her.  The young man
raised his gun, and Mulder closed his eyes, knowing he was next.

He heard the shot, but didn't feel any pain, and seconds later opened
his eyes to see Scully standing over them, a weapon still pointed at
the now dead man.
 

She had moved quickly when the first shot rang out, subduing the other
would-be robber with two quick moves and taking his gun.  She breathed
a silent prayer of thanks that the maneuvers she'd been taught as an
agent hadn't deserted her.

"Call 911," she barked at the frightened people still huddled behind the
counter.  "Tell them there's an officer down!"

She helped Mulder move Covalina to the side so he could sit up, and
the young woman moaned.

"She's still alive!"  Mulder turned his partner over and watched her
eyelids flutter as he pulled her head into his lap.  He leaned over,
shielding her face from the falling rain as best he could.

He didn't even notice the blood seeping from his left bicep.

-----

"You know, Covalina, jumping in front of me was a damned stupid thing
to do.  I ought to give you a formal reprimand."

"Told you--I had--your--back..."

He watched her eyes fall shut with a feeling of oppressive dread.

"Dammit, Covalina, don't you die on me!"

"Mulder, let me--"

Scully practically jerked Agent Covalina's body from his lap and began
CPR as he watched helplessly.  He knew he should assist her, but
something in him was frozen.  Instead, he stood back as if in a dream
while Scully worked on her, first alone, then with the aid of the
medics who had finally arrived.

It wouldn't matter, he knew.  Covalina was an expert at parting shots,
and this one had been a winner.

-----

After the whole mess had been sorted out, she'd taken him to the
hospital, had them bandage his arm, and then driven him home.  Mulder
had barely spoken a word the entire time, and she didn't press him.
He was practically catatonic with the shock of the afternoon.

Now they sat side by side on his couch in the gathering darkness.
They'd been there for at least an hour before Mulder had broken the
silence.

"She led me to you," he said softly, his voice barely audible in the
quiet stillness of the room.

"What?"

"She called me and said she had a flat tire.  Asked me to come help
her.  Said she'd wait inside.  She lied.  There was no flat tire on
her car, Scully.  She was trying to lead me to you."

There was a long pause, long enough for lifetimes to pass through each
of their minds before he spoke again.

"She died for us, Scully."

Her eyes clouded over with tears, unshed but shimmering blue.

"I know.  She loved you."

She wasn't certain how she ended up in his arms, but all at once they
were clinging to one another as the dam broke and they both gave way
to crushing emotions.

Scully locked her hands together behind him, holding as tightly as
possible, hoping to convey with her actions that she never intended to
let him go again.  This gift, given to them both at the hour of a
woman's selfless death, was far too precious to refuse.  She hoped
Mulder could feel that, as well.

The soft graze of his lips on hers, the wetness of his cheek pressed
against hers, let her know that he understood.

"She loved me and I couldn't return her love.  She knew that.  She
understood.  I've never known anyone like her."

She had no answer to give, so she simply held him.

After another long silence, he asked, "Scully, would you ever consider
coming back to the FBI?"

Scully gave a small sigh.  Come back?  It seemed so far in the past
now.

"No, Mulder.  I'm happy with my current job.  I wouldn't leave it."

That wasn't his real question, and they both knew it, but she waited.
Some questions didn't need to be asked aloud, but one of this magnitude
required verbalization.  As did its answer.

"Would you ever consider coming back to me?" he managed at last.

She cupped his still-wet face with her hands and kissed him softly on
the lips.

"I'm already here."

END