By:  Nantglyn
nantglyn@yahoo.com
 

Keywords:  MSR, Angst, Historical AU
Rating:  R
Disclaimer:  Characters are not mine.  Just for fun, not
for profit.
Archive:  I'll post to Gossamer.
Note:  Any errors are my own.

Summary:  A new life lay ahead for many who traveled the
Oregon Trail.  This is just one story.
 

Chapter 1

March 4, 1852
Thursday

Winter was still struggling to show its force with a chill
in the air and a light dusting of snow on the ground.
Hannibal Missouri was a typical river town that was growing
along the banks of the Mississippi River, with rolling
hills rising from the river.  Mark Twain was twenty-six
years old, just beginning his career as a writer.

Fox Mulder walked down the street, his steps crunching
lightly against the cobblestones.  He breathed in the air,
walking with purpose.  He heard that his friend Walter
Skinner was in town and was planning to go west with his
family.  He spotted Skinner's two oldest boys, sixteen year
old Victor and twelve year old Matthew, loading their wagon
with supplies from the general store.

Mulder crossed the street.  "Victor, hello.  Where's your
father?"

Victor and Matthew paused from their work.  "He's inside
Mr. Mulder.  Did you hear?" Victor asked excitedly.  We're
going to Oregon."

"Yes, that's why I wanted to see your father."  He looked
at the supplies sitting next to the wagon.  "Do you boys
need any help?"

"No thank you sir, we're fine.  Father is just finishing up
inside."

"Then I suppose I can help you after all."

Mulder had been helping the boys for only a short time when
Walter Skinner came out of the store, looking down and
counting his money.  "Boys, finish up and then..."   He
paused when he saw Mulder next to his boys, smiling.

"Hello, Skinner."

"Mulder," Skinner said, reaching out to shake Mulder's
hand.  "It's been too long.  You didn't need to help the
boys.  They can do this by themselves."

Mulder moved away from Skinner's sons and Skinner followed.
"I was just waiting to speak with you.  Do you have a
minute?"

The boys had stopped working, but soon began packing the
wagon again when they saw the look on their father's face.
"Of course, let's walk," he said as they began to stroll
down the street.

"I hear you're heading out west."

Skinner nodded.  "That's true.  We're going to Oregon.  I'm
leading about five families to St. Joe.  We'll join others
when we get there."

Mulder looked down, as if he was watching his steps
carefully.  "I was wondering if another family could come
along."

"I don't see a problem with that, but we leave in about a
month."  Skinner removed his hat and scratched the top of
his balding head.  "I don't know how they'd get ready in
time.  I've been planning this since last fall."  He
replaced his hat and asked, "Who do you know that wants to
go?"

Mulder looked back up.  "Me."

"Your father would allow that?  I don't see Mr. Mulder as
being someone who would let his only son leave."

"I'm a grown man.  I've been married and I have a child.  I
think I've lived under his roof long enough.  Walter, I
want to be on my own.  I feel like I have no control over
my life.  My father has controlled my life long enough.
I'm twenty-six-years old for God's sake.  It's time I live
my life the way I choose to live it, not the way Bill
Mulder says I should.  I should have done this a long time
ago."

Skinner stopped and Mulder followed suit.  "I'm not saying
I wouldn't welcome you Mulder.  It's just that I never saw
you leaving Missouri.  I thought you had too many ties
here."

Leaning against the brick wall of a building, Mulder shoved
his hands into his coat pockets and said, "There are too
many ghosts here.  I want to start fresh...I just need to
start over.  I can't keep living in the past."

"Are you planning on leaving Samantha with your parents?"

"No.  She's my daughter and I won't leave her behind."

Skinner hesitated before continuing.  "Then who's going to
take care of her?"

"I will."

"On the trail by yourself?  Mulder, you've had your mother
taking care of her since Penelope died.  You've never taken
care of her by yourself."  Skinner shoved his hands into
his coat pockets, imitating Mulder.  "You need a woman to
help you."

"What, you have someone in mind?" Mulder joked.

Skinner stared at him.

"You're serious."

Skinner looked down the street and ran his hand across his
beard.  His eyes followed the stagecoach as it drove
through town.  "Maybe."  He looked back at Mulder.  "I know
someone who needs a man to take care of her, but you can't
say it to her that way.  She's been living with us this
winter.  Her husband died last fall.  Jack Willis...did you
ever meet him?"

"No, I don't think so."

"That's what I thought.  They came from Pennsylvania only
last spring.  Anyway, she tried to run the farm by herself,
but I found her December alone with her son, running a
fever.  If she had been conscious, she wouldn't have let me
bring her to my house, but fortunately, she couldn't argue
with me.  She can be stubborn and independent."

"She sounds wonderful," Mulder commented sarcastically.

"She briefly talked about returning to the farm, but I
think she realizes how unrealistic that is.  I just sold
the land for her last month, so she'll have a little
money."

"I don't need her money."

"I know, but her brother Bill is insisting that she come to
St. Joe to marry a friend of his who recently lost his
wife.  This man said that he would marry her, but I don't
think that's best for her.  He's forty, has buried three
wives already, and has ten children.  I've promised her
that we would take her and her son there on our way to
Oregon.  Her brother is supposed to meet us in St. Joseph
to get them."  Pulling his coat closed tighter, Skinner
said, "Fox, Dana is only nineteen years old.  Marrying him
will make her old before her time."

"But she's agreed to this."

"Yes, but only because there doesn't seem to be any other
option.  She told me that the only family she can turn to
is her brother Bill.  He has a family as well and has let
Dana know that he can't take care of her and her son.  He
told her he can't afford to take on any more
responsibilities, not when she has a future available to
her."  Mulder pushed off the wall and Skinner followed
suit, heading back towards Skinner's sons.  "I would much
rather see her with you than with him."

"I'm not interested in remarrying.  The love of my life
died in my arms.  I will never love anyone else again.
It's just going to be me and Samantha."

"Think Mulder.  That's not good for Samantha.  You can't be
so selfish.  She needs a woman in her life, someone to show
her the ways to being a woman.  If you stayed here, your
mother could do that, but you're going to a new land with
no support.  Besides, you need sons to carry on your name.
Every man needs that."

"I have three sons.  All three buried next to their mother.
I'm not destined to have sons who live beyond a day.  I've
accepted that."

"But Dana has a son...and she's strong.  She could give you
sons.  Look Mulder, I'm not asking you to love her, but you
need a woman in your life if you and Samantha are going to
survive in Oregon.  Samantha is what, three?"

"Four."

"Who's going to look after her while you work the farm?
You're going to need someone.  Besides, they say that there
aren't many unattached women in Oregon.  Any woman who is
unattached is quickly snapped up.  The Oregon Donation Land
Act gives you twice as much land if you have a wife.  Now
is the time to find a wife and she's a good woman.  This is
the perfect answer."  They reached the Skinner wagon.
"Boys get in the wagon."  He turned back to Mulder.  "Fox,
just think about it.  She'll be at the Methodist church
with my family on Sunday.  You can meet her there."

"You know I haven't set foot in a church since Penelope
died."

"Make the exception Mulder.  This is important."  With that
Skinner jumped in his wagon and without looking back,
headed home.
 

March 7, 1852
Sunday

Outside the Methodist church sat buggies, wagons, and some
horses tied by themselves.  Mulder jumped down from his
horse, stretching his legs.  As he tied his horse to a
nearby tree, he could hear the service already in progress.
The churchgoers were singing hymns of praise.  One thing
about a Methodist, Mulder thought to himself, they do love
to sing their hymns.  He quietly climbed the stairs and
stood inside to let his eyes adjust.  He found an open seat
and slid into one of the back pews.

He went mostly unnoticed since the parishioners were
standing and singing their hearts out.  An elderly woman
next to him smiled and Mulder smiled back.

After the song, the parishioners sat down and Mulder
followed them.  The preacher began his sermon about some
sin, but Mulder wasn't listening.  He wasn't here for the
sermon.  Looking around the church, he spotted Skinner's
balding head.  It shone like a beacon about four pews up.

The Skinner family seemed to take up a whole pew.  Mulder
looked down the pew at the family.  Victor and Matthew sat
on the outside of the pew, next to Skinner.  On Skinner's
other side sat his wife Sharon Skinner.  She had her arm
around their youngest son Francis, who was seven years old
and very fidgety.  Mulder began to feel envious of Skinner.
He had three sons.  Maybe Skinner was right.

Sharon bent down, whispering to Francis and he soon sat
still.  Next to Francis sat the two Skinner girls,
Matthew's twin sister Louisa and Margaret who was nine
years old.  All of the children had Sharon's light
coloring.

As his eyes passed the girls, he saw a woman with red hair.
"So this is Dana Willis," he thought to himself.  A young
boy with blond hair rested his head on her shoulder.  He
was fast asleep, but Mulder could see there was nothing
unappealing about the child.  He wondered if he looked like
his mother or father.  He couldn't tell what the mother
looked like since she was turned away from him, listening
intently to the sermon.

Mulder didn't care if she was beautiful, but he hoped she
was at least slightly pleasing to the eye.  He had decided
that if she was too unattractive, he could easily slip out
of the church without Skinner ever knowing he was there.

Before he knew it, they were on their feet, ready to sing
again.  Mulder stood, keeping his eyes on Dana Willis.  She
still hadn't turned so that he could see her, but he could
see that she wasn't very tall.  She didn't stand much
taller than Louisa and she was slight in build.  Skinner
thought she would be able to handle the hard work that was
ahead of them?  She looked too delicate.  He was beginning
to rethink meeting her when suddenly, he found Skinner
standing in front of him.

"Mulder, I didn't think you would make it."

Mulder hadn't realized the service was over.  He turned to
look back at the Skinner pew, but no one was there.  "Yes,
I arrived a little late."

Skinner leaned in a little and whispered, "Wanted to make
sure you could make a quick exit?"

Mulder looked back at him, horrified that he had guessed
his intentions.  He didn't want to appear rude.  Looking
past Skinner, he tried to see Dana Willis, but could only
see the top of her head.

Skinner saw Mulder trying to find Dana and turned around.
"Mrs. Willis, would you please come here?  I have someone I
would like you to meet."

Slowly, Dana made here way through the Skinner family,
carrying her son who was still asleep.  She kept her face
turned down, so that he still couldn't get a good look at
her.

"Mrs. Dana Willis," Skinner said, "I would like to
introduce you to Mr. Fox Mulder."  She nodded her head but
still didn't look up.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Willis," Mulder said.

"Thank you.  I feel the same way Mr. Mulder."  When she
finally looked up, he found himself looking into the bluest
eyes he had ever seen.  He caught himself before he gasped
out loud.  When she slowly smiled, it was as if her whole
face lit up.  She was truly an attractive woman.  Maybe not
as pretty as Penny, but he thought to himself that yes,
there were possibilities here.

"Fox, why don't you come and have supper with us?" he heard
Sharon Skinner ask.

"Yes, Mulder.  You can follow us to our house.   Sharon has
plenty to eat," Skinner added.

"Thank you.  I'd enjoy that.  Could I walk you out Mrs.
Willis?"

Dana nodded and he walked behind her out the doors, the
Skinners following closely.  As they descended the stairs,
Dana looked down, making sure of her footing as she carried
her son.  Mulder followed her to the back of Skinner's
wagon.

"Let me help you with your son Mrs. Willis," Mulder said.

She looked down to her son before deciding to trust him for
a moment.  She handed him to Mulder and her son woke up.
"Mama?" he asked.

Mulder bounced him in his arms as Dana climbed into the
wagon.  "What's his name?"

Dana turned around and sat down, reaching for her son.
"Caleb."

The Skinner children began crawling into the back of the
wagon with Dana.  Skinner was up front helping his wife.

"That's a good strong name," Mulder said, reluctantly
handing him back to her.

"Thank you."

"Mulder," Skinner called.  He headed around to the front of
the wagon, where Skinner was waiting.  "Why don't you just
follow us?  You can stay the afternoon and talk to her."

Mulder nodded and headed back for his horse.  Skinner
turned his wagon and headed back for home as Mulder hurried
his horse to catch up, following closely.  As they rode,
the Skinner children talked among themselves while Dana
rode silently with Caleb on her lap.

Every so often, Caleb would look up at the tall man with
the mustache riding behind them.  Mulder would smile and
wave at him and Caleb would smile and bury his face in his
mother's shoulder.  He would get courage to look up at
Mulder again and they would begin the game all over again.
This continued until Caleb began to tire and fell asleep in
his mother's arms.

XXXXXXXXXX

After lunch, Sharon ushered the children outside.  As Dana
climbed the stairs to put her son down for a nap, Mulder
followed her with his eyes.

"Have you decided?" Skinner asked Mulder.  He didn't
respond.  Skinner tried again, "Mulder, have you made a
decision?"

"Huh?  Oh, I think so.  Yes, I believe so."

"What is your decision?"

"I've been thinking about what you said.  Samantha does
need a woman in her life.  It wouldn't be fair to her."
Mulder paused, "Do you really think she'd agree to this?"

"I've already mentioned it to her.  We've talked and I
think she believes you're the better prospect.  Of course,
you'll have to ask her yourself."

"Have you told her about my family?"

"No.  She only knows that you're a widower, with a
daughter, who wishes to start a new life in the Oregon
Territory.  I haven't told her anything beyond that.
You'll have to use your own judgment on when or if you
decide to tell her."

"Thank you.  I'd prefer that she didn't know that my family
has money.  I want her to make an honest decision, not
based on my money but on our combined circumstances."

Sharon came back inside.  "It was nice that you came to eat
with us Fox."  She began collecting the plates from the
table.  "So, what do you think of Dana?"

"She seems nice."

"When Dana comes down, why don't you ask her to walk to the
river?"

"Maybe."  Mulder leaned back in his chair.  "She's small.
Do you think she'll be able to handle the trip?"

Skinner smiled at his wife.  "She's stronger than she
looks," Sharon said.
 
Dana came back down the stairs and they all turned in her
direction, halting her in her tracks, sensing that they
were all talking about her.  Sharon covered by asking, "Is
he asleep?"

"Yes.  He falls asleep quickly."  Sharon sat down opposite
the head of the table, which her husband occupied.  Dana
followed suit, sitting opposite of Mulder.

Skinner stood, walking to the fireplace to stoke it.
"Mulder, why don't you take Dana for a walk?  It's nice out
this afternoon."  Mulder looked up at him, and behind Dana,
Skinner jerked his head towards the door with a stern look.

Mulder looked back at Dana, who had cast her eyes down
towards the table, her fingers lightly rubbing the surface
of the coarse tabletop.  He sighed and stood, throwing
Skinner an irritated look that said, 'I was getting to it,
don't push me.'

"Mrs. Willis, would you do me the honor of your company?"
Mulder reached out a hand toward her.  Dana looked up, the
corners of her mouth lifting briefly.  She looked as
uncomfortable as he felt.  She turned in her seat and put
her hand in his, nodding.

"Dana, put this blanket around you to stay warm," Sharon
said, handing her a small blanket.  Dana nodded and put it
around her as Mulder put his coat back on and held the door
for her.

XXXXXXXXXX

The children played in the yard, running after each other
as Dana and Mulder passed them.  Their voices faded as they
headed toward the river along a footpath.  They didn't
speak since the path caused them to occasionally walk
single file and branches of trees or bushes would reach
out, temporarily blocking their way.  As they reached the
river, the path opened up.  Mulder directed Dana towards a
log that lay parallel to the river and they sat side by
side, listening to the water as it rippled over rocks that
lay in shallow water.  Mulder picked up a rock and threw
it, skimming the water in a pool across the way.  He heard
Dana sigh and turned towards her.

"Sorry," he said.  "I don't know where to begin."

"You know, I've come to consider the Skinners like family.
They've been very good to me."

"Yes, they're good people."

Dana smoothed her dress with her hands.  "And I know they
saved me and my son.  I trust them."  Mulder nodded for her
to continue.  "I know they've spoken to you about me.  My
brother and his family live outside St. Joseph.  I have a
sister in New York, but her husband is a harsh man and I
have no desire to live with them.  I have a younger brother
Charlie but we don't know where he is.  He was living with
my sister, but left her home last year and hasn't been
heard of since."

"I didn't realize you had other family.  Skinner only
mentioned your brother Bill."

"I haven't seen Melissa for a couple of years.  I've only
heard from Billy because Skinner wrote him on my behalf
when I was ill.  I don't think he would have contacted me
on his own."

"Oh."

Dana placed the blanket on the log and picked up a rock,
throwing it, trying to imitate Mulder.  It landed with a
plunk not far from where she threw it.  She heard Mulder
chuckle beside her.  She turned back to him.  "So, my
brother has arranged a marriage to his friend, Mr.
Sanderson.  I guess Walter told you about him too."

"Yes.  He said you've agreed to marry him."

"I don't really want to do it, but I have to provide for my
son.  I have to do what's best for him."

"Is that best?"

Sighing, Dana stood, grabbing the blanket.  "It's clear to
me now that it is.  I'm sorry I wasted your time Mr.
Mulder.  The walk down was pleasant, but if you'll excuse
me, I think I should get back to my son."  She passed in
front of him, but was stopped when Mulder grabbed her
wrist.

"Wait."

Dana turned towards him and looked down at his hand.  He
immediately released it.  Getting up, he walked away from
her and tilted his head back, taking a deep breath and
releasing it.  Turning back in her direction, he said,
"Mrs. Willis, please sit back down."  When she crossed her
arms and just stood there, staring at him, he said,
"Please."

Dana turned around and took her seat again.  "All right,
I'm sitting."

"I'm sorry, but this is uncomfortable for me."

"It's uncomfortable for me too."

"I know," Mulder agreed.  "I think you should know I want
to start a new life.  There are too many memories here.
There are pleasant ones, but there are also ones that I
want to forget."

"Like losing your wife."

"Walter told you."  She nodded.  "Of course he did.  Yes,
like losing my wife.  Mrs. Willis, I can't promise you
anything except to provide for you and your son.  In
return, I would like you to take care of my daughter."

"I need to hear it Mr. Mulder.  From that description, I
could be your housekeeper.  Is that what you want from me?
Do you want me to be your housekeeper or your wife?"

"I loved my wife very much.  I loved her more than
anything.  I ache so much still from the thought of losing
her.  I thought we would be together forever.  All I can
promise you is as I said.  We will be husband and wife, but
I can only promise to be a good husband...to be kind and to
provide for you and your son.  I'm sorry, but I think
that's all I can promise you."

"I see."

"I'll be a father to your son too.  He'll be my son.  He
will inherit the same as any of my sons will."

"That's very generous."

"I'm sure we could get your preacher to marry us.  I was
thinking we would marry the day we leave.  Would that be
all right?  I have a lot to do before we leave."

"I suppose."

"I think we should go back now.  They've probably been
watching the path since we left."

They went back the same way they came, quietly walking,
deep in their own thoughts.  When they reached the opening,
they again walked side by side.  As they got close to the
house, Mulder said, "I'll come by for you a few days before
we leave.  We'll need to get some supplies.  I'll get the
basics, but I'll want you to go to the general store with
me to get things for the children and us.  I don't think
we'll see each other again until then.  I have a lot to do
to get us ready.  Do you mind?"

"No, I understand."

They looked up and saw Sharon and Walter Skinner in the
doorway, watching them.  Mulder stopped Dana as Skinner
came up to them.  "Well?" he asked.

Mulder spoke up.  "We've come to an agreement."

Skinner tilted his head.  "An agreement?"

"Mrs. Willis, I'll be by as promised if the weather is
good.  Thank you for the walk."

Dana smiled, nodded her head, and turned to walk back to
the house.  Sharon quickly pulled her into the house.
Mulder had the feeling she would be questioned as well.

"Mulder, what do you mean by an agreement.  Did you ask her
to marry you?"

"Sort of."

"What did you mean by an agreement?"

Mulder walked towards his horse.  "I don't think I want to
discuss it."

"Did she say yes?"

"Sort of.  Listen Skinner, I have to get going."  With
that, he mounted his horse and looked down.  "You're going
to be there when the brother finds out, right?  I don't
think he's going to be happy about what we're going to do,"
Mulder joked.

"Told you about her brother did she?"

"Just a little, but I just have a feeling that he's not
going to be happy with either of us."

Skinner nodded.  "Probably not."

"I'll be back a couple of days before we leave to take her
to town."

"You're not going to see her again until then?  When will
you marry?"

"The day we leave."

"You're kidding.  You don't want to get to know each other
before then?"

"What would be the point?  We've made a decision.  She
seems like an honorable woman.  I don't think she'll change
her mind."

"Yes, but..."

"I'll probably see you in a couple of weeks.  Walter."
Mulder tipped his head in farewell.  As he kicked his horse
and headed down the lane, his thoughts turned to his plans
for the next month.

~~~
 

Chapter 2

March 17, 1852
Wednesday

The Mulder family had gathered for breakfast in the large
dining room.  At the table, Samantha was chatting about a
doll that her grandfather had bought her just yesterday.
It sat in a chair next to her.  Mulder smiled across the
table and nodded, though he wasn't really listening to her.
Seated next to Samantha was her grandmother, who smiled and
nodded.  She reached over to smooth Samantha's long brown
hair.  Mulder's father sat at the head of the table between
his son and wife, speaking whenever Samantha asked a
question.
 
"Samantha, why don't you go play upstairs in your room?  I
need to speak with Grandmother and Grandfather," Mulder
said.

Samantha pouted.  "I'm not finished eating."

"You've been playing with your food for the last few
minutes.  Go on, go upstairs."

"Grandmother," she whined to his mother.

Mulder sighed and his mother nodded for Samantha to go.  He
watched her climb out of her chair and grab her doll,
skipping as she left the room.

She listened more to her grandparents than she did to him.
He supposed that was partly his fault.  After Penny had
died, he had been too distraught to think about anything
but losing his wife.  Even his daughter was in the
background.  He didn't take control of his daughter when
his grieving eased; it was just easier to let his mother
take care of her.  This made it even more important to
break free and start over.

When Samantha left, his father said, "Well Fox, what's this
about?  It sounds serious."

"It is Father."  He watched the motion of his thumb rubbing
the smooth surface of the spoon in his right hand.  He felt
his father's eyes on him, watching him intently.  He placed
the spoon down and sat up straighter.  "You know I
appreciate everything you have done for me and Samantha.
And you know I love you both."

"Fox, what is it dear?" his mother asked.  Mulder could
tell he was making his parents nervous.

"I'm going to Oregon," he said abruptly.  He took a breath
and continued.  "There are too many memories for me here.
I haven't felt happy for quite some time, not since
Penny...  Anyway, I plan to go with Walter Skinner and his
family."

"Skinner.  I should have known this would have something to
do with him," his father stated.

"But what about Samantha?" his mother asked.

"She'll come with me of course," he said to his mother and
to his father, he said, "and it was my idea, not
Skinner's."

"What?"  He could tell his father was unhappy with this
revelation.  "You're not taking her all the way to God
knows where.  I've read stories about the trip.  It's
dangerous.  I won't allow it Fox."

Mulder stood up from the table.  "You can't stop me.  She's
my daughter and I'll do what I think is best for her...and
that's going with me to Oregon.  I want to be a father for
her again.  I haven't felt like I have been for a long
time."

His mother got up and went to her son, placing her hand on
his arm.  "Fox, please, don't do this.  If you feel you
must go, do so, but please, leave Samantha with us.  I lost
my daughter; I don't think I can stand to lose my
granddaughter too."

"Well I can't lose my daughter either.  I promise; I'll
take good care of her.  Maybe one day we can come back for
a visit."

"She needs me in her life Fox.  You're a man.  When she
gets older, she'll want to talk to a woman who can help
her.  I can talk to her about things you'll never
understand," his mother cried.

Mulder paused before saying, "She'll have someone.  I'm
getting married before I leave."

His father had been quiet, but could not stop himself.
"Married?  I didn't know you've been courting anyone.  Who
is she?"

Mulder hesitated.  "You don't know her."

"Well, how do you know her?"

"Walter Skinner introduced me to her."

"When?"

Mulder looked up, and then sighed, looking his father in
the eye.  "A few days ago."

"Fox, have you lost your mind?"  Mulder flinched at his
father's harsh tone.  "Now I know you're not taking our
granddaughter."

"She's a good woman."

"And you learned this in a couple of days?"

"She's agreed to be a mother to Samantha and I'll be a
father to her son.  It's a good bargain."

"'A good bargain.'  It sounds more like a business
arrangement than a marriage."

"Well, maybe you're not too far off there.  I just know
that this feels right.  For the first time in a long time,
I feel optimistic."  Mulder crossed to the opening of the
door when he was halted by his father's harsh words.

"Fox, if you take Samantha, you will never see one penny of
my money.  I'll see to it that only Samantha gets my
money."

Mulder turned back to his father.  "That's the only way you
think you can control me, isn't it Father?  Well you can
keep your money.  I don't need it.  Grandfather has taken
care of me.  I haven't touched the money he left me, but
it'll be enough to take care of us.  I don't want your
money Father.  Leave it all to Samantha.  I don't care;
you're not stopping me.  We're leaving in a month.  I don't
wish to leave in anger, but you won't stop me."

His father tried another tactic, his last desperate attempt
to stop his son.  It was all he had left.  "So, you're
going to turn your back on your sister?  You're going to
stop looking for her?"

"We haven't found her in over 10 years.  I'm not sure I
would even recognize her if I passed her on the street.
You continually make me feel guilty for losing her.  I do
feel guilty, are you happy?"

With that, Mulder turned his back on his parents, grabbed
his coat from the entryway, and slammed the door as he left
the house.

Later that morning, Mulder stopped by the bank to withdraw
the money he had inherited from his grandfather.  The
banker was shocked to hear that he was leaving, but said
more people were leaving daily.  Some were heading for
California where it was said a man could get rich quickly.
Was he going there?  Mulder told him Oregon was where he
and his family would be heading.

As he left the bank, Mulder knew that Oregon was the right
decision.  He wasn't interested in going to California to
get rich.  He now had enough money in his hand to guarantee
that his family would be comfortable wherever they decided
to make their home.
 

March 19, 1852
Friday

Mulder rode up the short drive to his Aunt Millie and Uncle
John Pendrell's farm.  They lived in a simple two-story
home and owned 160 acres.  It wasn't a huge place, nothing
compared to what Mulder grew up in, but it was comfortable.
When he was younger, Mulder loved to stay overnight with
his aunt and uncle.

His mother had married above herself and had lived a
wealthy life, but he often felt that there was something
missing from his father and mother's marriage.  He believed
that they weren't as close as they had once been.  He felt
them drift apart after his sister's disappearance and only
recently, they seemed to be drawn together again, after his
daughter Samantha was born.  He supposed they were reliving
their Samantha through his Samantha.  That couldn't be
healthy for his daughter.

His aunt and uncle truly appeared to be in love and their
love had never seemed to wane.  He now sought out two of
their sons, Jimmy and Danny.  He hoped he could convince
them to go west with him.  He would need their help and he
thought he could easily convince the boys, but his parents
might be another matter.

XXXXXXXXXX

"No Fox, you are not taking my boys away from me.  I won't
have it," his aunt firmly told him.

"But Mama, it's a chance for us," Jimmy said.  He was tall
and lanky, but a hard worker.  Mulder had seen him work a
full day in the field and never complain.  He was three
years older than his brother Danny, who was seventeen.
Danny was more solidly built than his brother.  They both
favored their father in coloring, with fair skin and
reddish blond hair.

Mulder knew that if he had these boys along, they would
have a better chance of building a future in Oregon.  He
could hire some men to drive his wagons, but he preferred
to have family along.  They knew how to work a farm,
something of which he had absolutely no knowledge.  He felt
that he could learn from the boys and then survive on his
own.  In return, Mulder intended to provide them with
supplies and money of their own so that they might begin
their own lives.

They had been talking for over an hour and Mulder knew his
aunt was weakening.  "I don't want to lose you both," Aunt
Millie said.  She looked over to her husband, hoping he
would say something to discourage them, but she knew she
had already lost her battle when she saw the resignation on
his face.

"The boys have to be on their own sometime Millie," Uncle
John said.  "At least they'll be with Fox."

Mulder nodded.  "We'll be all right Aunt Millie.  This is
an opportunity for all of us.  I'll make sure they're safe,
I promise."

"Don't make promises to me that you can't keep Fox.  You
don't know what dangers lay ahead."

Mulder nodded.  "You're right, I shouldn't promise."  He
saw tears in her eyes, but now she wore the same look of
resignation as her husband.  They had won.  They had made
their case.

Millie stood up and hugged Mulder.  "Just promise that you
will all try to be safe," she whispered.  "I'll be
satisfied with that."

Mulder hugged her back.  "I promise," he said, stepping
away from her.  "I'll need to take the boys to town with me
in a few days to get some supplies."

His aunt nodded and walked up the stairs and out of sight.
When she was gone, the boys followed Mulder outside.

XXXXXXXXXX

The house was dark when Mulder arrived late at his parent's
house.  It was quiet as he entered and headed for the
stairs.  Mulder began to climb when he heard his father
call from the parlor.  He headed back down and saw his
father sitting in his favorite chair.

"Fox, come sit down."

Mulder hesitated by the door but finally crossed the room
to sit on the sofa.  He stretched out his legs and leaned
back, lacing his fingers across his lap.  "Father, I'm
really tired.  Could we talk in the morning?"

"No.  I don't want this to wait."  His father got up and
crossed to the fireplace which Mulder only now noticed
still glowed with orange embers.  After putting another log
on, his father stirred the embers.  Soon, a small fire was
glowing in the fireplace.  Keeping his back to his son, he
said, "Son, you know we love you."

When his father didn't say anything further, Mulder said,
"Yes, of course I do."

Bill Mulder turned back around and said, "We don't want to
lose you or Samantha.  Fox, you're all we have."

"I know that, but you have to let me do what I think is
right.  You left your home when you were young.
Grandfather didn't want you to come to Missouri.  He wanted
you to stay in Kentucky.  You've told me that story many
times.  Did you stay like he wanted you to?  Of course not.
I'm not any different from you Father.  I want to build my
own life.  I believe I deserve the same opportunity you
had.  I know this is right.  I do," he finished quietly.

"But I didn't go to another country," his father reasoned.
"There are many more dangers that you will face if you go.
Do you really know what you're getting yourself and your
daughter into?"

"I've read the stories just as you have, but you and I both
know that sometimes stories are exaggerated."

His father sighed and returned to his chair.  "And
sometimes they aren't."

"That's true, but I have to take that risk...if nothing
else, then for my sanity."

"We'll never see you or Samantha again," his father said
sadly.

"You will.  We can return and visit sometime."

"You can believe that Fox, but I don't."  His father shook
his head and sighed.  They sat quietly, listening to the
fire crackle when his father continued, "All right.  Go
with our blessing.  Just be careful."

"I will."

"I'm going to have the men make the best wagons for you.
I'll have them start on yours right away.  I want you in
safe wagons."

"Thank you Father."

"How many are you going to take?"

"I'm only taking two.  I'm going to load one with the
supplies and have the other for us to sleep in.  I don't
want us sleeping on the ground the whole trip.  Do you
think you could send one wagon on ahead up the river and
have a man wait with it?  We'll use that one to sleep in
once we leave St. Joe.  I would prefer to only take one
across the state."

"If that's what you want."

"I really appreciate this."

"I'll buy and send some livestock for you too.  Do you want
me to find men to go with you?"

"No.  I'm taking Jimmy and Danny with me."

"What?  Do your aunt and uncle know?"

"Yes, although it took some convincing.  I trust the boys."

"Do you need any money?"

Mulder smiled.  "No thank you.  I meant it; Grandfather's
money will be enough for us."

His father nodded, and then asked, "When are we going to
meet your bride?"

Mulder laid his head on the back of the sofa, looked up at
the ceiling, and let out a long breath.  "You aren't."

"Of course we are.  We have every right to know who is
going to be raising our granddaughter."

"No."

"Why don't you want us to meet her?  Are you saying we
won't even be invited to the wedding?"

"I don't want her to know about my background.  I'm going
to marry her the day we leave.  We'll just say our vows and
go."

Mulder heard his father shift in the chair.  "Fox, I know
you grieved for Penny, but I didn't think you were still
grieving for her."

"What do you mean?" he asked, surprised.  "Of course I
still miss her.  I miss her every day."  He looked away and
said quietly, "Why did you have to mention her?"

"I just can't believe you're marrying a woman you obviously
don't love, couldn't even love because you don't even
really known her."

"I don't love her.  This is just an arrangement...an
agreement between the two of us."

"I would rather you didn't marry anyone if you didn't love
her.  A loveless marriage is not a pleasant way to live."

"Is this the voice of experience?"

Shooting him an angry look, his father said, "No.  That's
not true, you know it isn't Fox.  I love your mother."

"But are you still in love with her?"

His father got up and walked toward the door.  He ignored
the question, but said instead, "Your mother and I will
pray every day for you and Samantha, Fox.  Make sure the
fire dies down before you go to bed."  As he left the room,
he heard his son call, "I will."
 

April 14, 1852
Wednesday

Mulder knocked on the Skinner's door and their daughter
Louisa answered it.  "Hello, Mr. Mulder.  Mama says to come
in and sit in the parlor.  Mrs. Willis will be down in a
few moments."  Louisa grabbed his hand and pulled him into
the room to the side.  She stopped in front of the sofa and
sat down, pulling Mulder with her.  They listened as they
heard feet running down the stairs.  Soon Margaret, her
younger sister, ran into the room.

"Hello, Mr. Mulder.  Mama says that Mrs. Willis will be
down in..."

"A few moments.  Yes, thank you Margaret."

"Mama and Mrs. Willis said that Louisa and I can go to town
with you if you say it's all right.  Can we Mr. Mulder,
pleeeeze?"

Mulder hadn't counted on chaperones, but he supposed that
Sharon was right.  If they were to meet anyone, it wouldn't
be proper to be alone on the road.  Besides, he really
liked the two girls.  They were curious, but well mannered.
"Yes, you can go."

As soon as he answered, they raced out of the room,
squealing with delight.  He supposed that they were going
to give his answer to the women upstairs.  Mulder soon
heard two sets of feet running back downstairs, followed by
a sharp, "Girls, do not run in the house," and the steps
immediately slowed.

He saw the smiling girls first, followed by Sharon Skinner
and finally Dana Willis, who cautiously avoided his gaze.
Since she didn't speak, he took the opportunity to say the
first words, "Good morning Mrs. Willis.  I apologize for
not coming yesterday, but I thought it was too wet to go
out.  It looks like we'll have a fine day today though.
It's a bit chilly, so you'll want to wear a cape this
morning."

Turning towards him, but not looking up, she said, "Thank
you, I'll do that."  Dana headed toward the door where
several capes were hanging and handed the girls their
capes.  "Come on, let's go girls."  To Sharon she said,
"Are you sure you'll be fine with him?  I can take him with
me."

"Dana, go on.  I've raised my own boys; I believe I can
handle Caleb.  I'll enjoy it.  I miss having a little one
around."  Sharon saw her hesitate again as Mulder was
trying to urge her out the door.  "Go on, we'll be all
right."

Dana looked up at Mulder when he said, "He'll be tired from
a trip to town.  It'll be easier on him if Sharon takes
care of him.  Come on," he urged, placing his hand on her
arm, "we need to get going.  We won't be gone that long."
As Mulder was about to close the door, he turned back to
Sharon.  "Tell Walter I need to talk to him when we get
back."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder headed the wagon towards the general store, pulling
up in front.  "Okay girls, each of you can buy three cents
worth of candy."

They smiled and said, "Thank you, Mr. Mulder."

The girls jumped down as soon as the wagon stopped, racing
to the store.  "Girls," Mulder and Dana both yelled and the
girls halted in their tracks.

"Remember; be on your best behavior.  I don't want to tell
your father you were otherwise."

"Yes, Mr. Mulder," they chimed before entering the store.

After Mulder jumped down, he secured the team and came
around to help Dana down.  He began to grab her waist, but
changed his mind and offered his hand instead.

Dana chuckled slightly and smiled.  "Thank you, Mr.
Mulder," she said as she took his hand.

Mulder opened the door and Dana entered in front of him.
"You go ahead and look around," he told her.  "I already
picked up most of what we need, but I want you to pick out
clothing for the children.  Buy what they need now and in
the future.  The children will grow on the trip, so they'll
need larger clothes and shoes.  Also, get yourself a couple
of dresses, shoes and anything else you might need."

"I don't need anything, but I can pay for my child's
clothing Mr. Mulder.  I do have some money."

"Nonsense, keep your money.  I'm paying for everything."

"Really, I can help.  I want to help."

"I said no.  I'm taking care of everything.  Trust me; you
don't want me to pick out your dresses."

"All right, Mr. Mulder.  I'll let you buy things for Caleb,
but really, I don't want anything for myself."

Mulder grabbed her wrist and tugged her towards a wall
where dresses were hanging.  He began pulling out the first
dress he saw.

"Mr. Mulder, I wouldn't wear that, it's too revealing."

He put the dress back and pulled out another one.  "How
about this one?"

"You're joking," she said.  "It's too big."  When he placed
it back and began to pull out another, she put her hand on
his arm to stop him.  "All right, I'll find something.
Please, just go."

Mulder smiled at her, happy to have his way.   "Good.  Get
at least two dresses.  If you don't, I'll be forced to come
back and pick some out for you.  As you saw, I'm not very
good at it.  And buy plenty of material for making other
clothes later.  I've heard the prices are much worse out
west."

He headed toward the back of the store leaving Dana to her
own devices.  He wanted to buy a few personal items for
himself as well.  While he was looking, he heard a woman
from behind say, "Fox."  He jumped in spite of himself.  He
turned around and saw Miss Emmy Lou Baxter, a pretty woman
with blond hair and blue eyes.  Not as blue as Dana's,
Mulder noted.

"Emmy Lou, how are you?" he asked politely.

"Oh, I'm fine.  Have you been avoiding me Fox?"

"No, why?"  Mulder looked back at the shelf, his eyes
searching randomly for anything they might need.

"You haven't come by in a couple of months."  She moved in
closer to Mulder.  "Did I do something wrong?" she asked,
pouting her lips.

"Of course not, I've just been busy."

"Daddy and Mama have missed you too.  I've been making
excuses why you haven't come by, but I'm running out of
them.  Fox," she said, stamping her foot, "I want you to
come by to visit me."

Mulder turned back towards her and said, "I told you, I've
been busy.  In fact, I don't really have time to talk now."

"But Fox," she said, leaning into him, "I miss you."

Mulder looked back at the shelf.  He was looking for a
mirror that would be big enough for them to use, but not
too big to take along with them.

Emmy Lou tried again.  "Remember when we went to the lake."

Mulder smiled.  "Yes, I remember."

She dropped her voice and said, "You are the only one I
have ever let do that to me...the only one."

Mulder looked into her eyes and said, "Yes, I know."

"Fox, when are we getting married?"

"What?" Mulder asked a little too loudly.  He lowered his
voice back down.  "I never said we were getting married."

"But I let you.  I wouldn't have unless I expected us to
get married."  Her pout abruptly turned to a smile.  "Come
to Sunday supper.  I absolutely insist that you do."

Mulder was about to answer when he spotted Dana standing
behind Emmy Lou.  He wondered how long she had been there.

"Mr. Mulder," she said, "I was wondering if you thought
your daughter might like this color?"  She held up a bolt
of green material.

"Um, yes, I think so," he said, moving towards her, pushing
past Emmy Lou.  "She really isn't a picky child.  She'll
like whatever you select."

Dana looked around Mulder and said, "Hello, I'm--"

"Emmy Lou, this is Mrs. Dana Willis.  Dana, this is Miss
Emmy Lou Baxter, an old friend."

The frosty smile on Emmy Lou's face warmed a little when
she heard Dana introduced as a misses.  "Oh, are you a
friend of Fox's?"

"I'm afraid I won't be able to join you this Sunday Emmy
Lou, but thank you for the invitation."  He turned Dana
around and headed her towards the front of the store.

"Who is she?" Dana asked.  "I don't think she was too happy
that I interrupted you."

"She's no one.  Have you found everything you need?"

"She didn't seem like no one to me."

"We'll be gone in less than a week and she will have
forgotten me," he said, taking the bolt of material from
her.

"Doesn't look like that's possible."  Dana peered around
him.

"What do you mean?"

"Fox, why won't you come?"  Emmy Lou asked from behind him.

Mulder sighed and as he turned around, he saw her pouting
again.  "Emmy Lou, I'm leaving for Oregon Saturday.  I
won't have time for a social call."

"Oregon?"

"Yes.  I'm getting married before I leave and taking
Samantha and my new family there."

"What do you mean you're marrying?  You're marrying someone
else?  Fox, you promised to marry me."

"No.  I never said that."  Mulder handed some money to
Dana.  "Dana, please go make your purchases.  We can get
whatever else we need later."

"Wait a minute, you're marrying her?"  Emmy Lou looked her
up and down; a contemptuous look began to appear on her
face.  "Fox, this is a joke.  Tell me this is a joke that
you're playing on me."

"No, why would I do that?"

"You've never been interested in a woman like...," she
waved her hand in the air, searching, "like her."
 
"Miss Baxter, I don't have to explain myself."  Mulder
tried to get Dana to move, but she seemed rooted to the
floor.

"You owe me everything," Emmy Lou said, her voice beginning
to rise in volume.  "I wouldn't have let you do it if I
didn't think we were going to get married."

"Emmy Lou," Mulder said through his clenched teeth, "lower
your voice."

"Did he tell you?" Emmy Lou asked Dana.

"That's enough," Mulder said to Emmy Lou.  Mulder grabbed
Dana and pushed her towards the door.  "We're leaving."  As
they were walking by the front, Mulder said, "Harvey, bill
my father for everything.  He'll take care of it for me."

"No problem, Mr. Mulder.  I'll have my son load your things
on your wagon," Harvey said, looking uneasy.

Mulder looked at the bolt of material, still in Dana's
hands.  "Add this too.  Come on girls, we're leaving."

XXXXXXXXXX

Outside, the owner's son finished loading the items that
Dana and Mulder had bought.  Mulder lifted the girls into
the wagon and they immediately settled down, eating the
treats that Mulder had bought them.

He offered a hand to Dana to help her into the wagon.  She
gathered her skirts, ignored his hand, and climbed up by
herself.  Mulder dropped his hand.  He knew this would
probably be a long trip back.  He unhitched the team from
the post and climbed aboard.

As they pulled away, Dana saw Miss Baxter glaring at her
through the large window in the storefront.  She scooted as
close to the edge of the seat as possible as they drove in
silence for some time.

Later, Mulder looked back to see the girls asleep.  "I'm
sorry."

Dana startled and sat up straighter.  "Sorry for what?"

"For what happened back at the store."

"I'm all right Mr. Mulder."

"I was courting Emmy Lou a few of months ago.  I decided
that it didn't feel right, so I ended it.  I guess she
didn't understand."

"She implied you were doing more than courting."  Dana
looked up at Mulder and then back down at her hands.  "I'm
sorry.  I shouldn't have said that.  It's none of my
business."

"No, it is.  We were--"

"No.  Really, I don't want to know."

Mulder looked at her, but she continued looking away from
him.  They rode the rest of the way in silence.

XXXXXXXXXX

When they drove up the lane to Skinner's house, Mulder saw
the older boys working in the field.  It looked like
Skinner was trying to finish up with last minute
preparations.  He stopped the wagon and turned to the back
of the wagon.  "Girls, wake up.  We're home."  The girls
stretched and rubbed their eyes, trying to get the sleep
out of them.  They slowly became aware of their
surroundings and jumped out of the wagon, racing towards
their brothers.

Mulder chuckled, "Those girls only have one speed...fast."
Dana was quiet so he started the team again.  "They're good
girls."

"Yes, yes they are.  All of the Skinner children are
wonderful.  Walter wouldn't have it any other way."

When they pulled up to the house, Mulder jumped down
intending to help Dana down.  When he offered his hand, she
just sat there.

"Mrs. Willis, going up on your own is one thing, but coming
down is not as easy.  Let me help you."

"We're not going to get married."

"What?"

"I know asking to marry me was asked in desperation, but
Miss Baxter said it herself.  Obviously, I'm not someone
that you would normally select as a wife.  I'm releasing
you from your promise Mr. Mulder."

"The hell you are."

"Please do not use profanity Mr. Mulder.  Go ask Miss
Baxter to marry you.  It's the right thing to do."

"She may want to marry me, but I have no interest in
marrying her.  I couldn't marry her."

"Why not?"

"Because..." he said, smiling, "because I want to keep my
sanity.  Listen Dana, if you want to back out of this
arrangement, then I'll live with your decision, just don't
use Emmy Lou as an excuse.  I plan to get married Saturday.
If you still don't want to marry, then I will accept your
decision.  Now give me your hand and get out of the damned
wagon Mrs. Willis."

Dana felt her face flame, but put her hand in his.  He
gripped it firmly, but immediately regretted losing his
temper when he felt her hand shaking in his.  He hadn't
meant to be harsh, but she was acting foolish.

When she was on the ground, he held her hand, and lifted
her chin so that she was looking at him.  "I am willing and
ready to marry you, but the decision will ultimately be
yours."  He released her hand and she quickly walked into
the house, leaving Mulder standing alone by his wagon.

~~~

Chapter 3

April 17, 1852
Saturday

The Skinners almost had their three wagons loaded and
waiting outside of their house.  The two men that Skinner
had hired to drive his wagons, George Brown and Zachariah
Lear, were helping him and his older boys finish with last
minute details.  The Skinner girls and Francis were busy
chasing a hen.

Mulder pulled up with Samantha beside him in their wagon,
his horse tied to the back.  The Pendrell boys followed
Mulder on horseback with the preacher trailing behind them.

Mulder jumped down and reached for Samantha.  As he set her
on the ground, she immediately ran off to help in the
chase.

Skinner came up behind him.  "You ready?" he asked.

As he turned, Mulder said, "As I'll ever be.  Is she still
marrying me?"

"Yes, she's waiting inside."

The Reverend Walkup came up to the men.  "Mr. Skinner," he
said, nodding.  "The church is going to miss the Skinner
family.  You have always been such an asset."

"Well we're going to miss the church too preacher, but we
have a bright future ahead of us.   Shall we get started?"

Mulder nodded and yelled, "Samantha."  She immediately came
running to him.  He lifted her up and kissed her.

"Mulder, maybe you should leave her with the girls."
Skinner said.  "We need to get going, we're already running
late."

"All right."  He turned to Samantha and said, "Be a good
girl and stay with Louisa and Margaret.  I'll be right
back."

"Okay Papa."  Mulder set her back on the ground and she
joined back in the chase as if she had never stopped.
"Reverend, after you."  Mulder and Skinner followed him
into the house.

XXXXXXXXXX

The Skinner's three wagons led the party.  Mulder's wagon
followed Skinner while the others followed him.  In all
there were now seven families and twelve wagons.  Dana sat
next to Mulder, her husband of five hours.  Caleb sat on
her lap and Samantha sat between them, watching the scenery
quietly.

Dana glanced down at her new wedding ring, a plain gold
ring.  Earlier that morning, she had removed her old
wedding ring from Jack and put it deep inside her trunk.
It was more exquisite, with several rubies.  She intended
to give it to Caleb when he found a wife.

Mulder looked across Dana to see a large black and white
dog running beside the wagon.  "I don't know why you had to
bring that mongrel along."

"Mr. Mulder, it's my son's dog.  I couldn't leave him
behind."

"Well he's not going to ride in the wagon," Mulder
grumbled.

"I didn't ask you to let him up.  Dog is very protective of
my son.  He'll be an asset, you'll see."

"Humph.  What a stupid name...Dog."

"My son named him," Dana said frostily.

"Oh.  Well he's your responsibility.  I have enough to
worry about without another thing on my mind.  You'll have
to take care of him."

"I intend to," she said, wrapping her arms tighter around
Caleb.

XXXXXXXXXX

They rode on for another few hours before stopping.  The
sun was beginning to set low in the sky.  Skinner felt that
they had made good time, so he decided to make camp beside
a small river after getting permission from the owner of
the land.

Dana prepared the meal while Mulder and the Pendrell boys
set up a tent for the night.  Mulder's family would stay in
the tent and the boys would sleep in the open unless it
rained.  If it did, then they would join the family in the
tent.  For now, they had to be content to sleep in the
open, not particularly pleasant considering the nights were
still chilly.  When they arrived in St. Joseph, Mulder
intended to sleep in the other wagon that his father was
sending on ahead and allow the boys to take over the tent.
He also planned to buy the more practical oxen to add to
his livestock.

After Dana had fed the boys, Mulder and their children,
they settled by their campfire.  Danny and Jimmy were off
to themselves somewhere.   They could hear the quiet
conversations of the others in the party.

Samantha lay in Mulder's lap, asleep.  Caleb was in the
same position in Dana's arms.  Both of the children were
exhausted after their first day on the road.  Dog lay at
Dana's feet, quietly snoring.

"You said that the boys were your cousins.  How are they
related to you?"

"Danny and Jimmy are my mother's sister's children."

"You must be pretty close to them for them to want to come
with you."

Mulder nodded.  "I trust them.  I spent my weekends and
much of my summers with my Aunt Millie and Uncle John."

"How old are they?"

"Danny's seventeen and Jimmy is twenty."

"Jimmy's older than me?  I wouldn't have guessed that."

"They've been pretty protected by their parents.  Their
family is very loving.  That's one of the reasons I loved
spending time there."

Dana wasn't sure what he was implying, but wasn't
comfortable enough with him yet to ask too many personal
questions.  She had a feeling he didn't grow up in as
loving of a home.

"Good evening," Skinner said as he came into their camp.
He sat down and Dog came over and put his head on Skinner's
lap.  He reached down and scratched Dog behind his ears.
"Glad he's your responsibility now.  Hope you brought
plenty of food, he's a big eater."

Mulder shot him a glare.  He wasn't happy about the damn
dog, but when they had stopped for the night, Samantha had
walked over to the dog and threw her arms around him.  The
dog licked her face and Samantha smiled at her father.
Mulder knew then that there was no way he was going to be
able to dump the dog.  He had thought maybe he could get
rid of it somewhere along the way, but that was out of the
question now.

"Mulder, he's a good watchdog.  You'll be glad you brought
him," Skinner assured him.

"If you say so.  I just don't care much for dogs."

"If you'll excuse me, I think I need to get the children to
bed," Dana said.  Skinner rose and Mulder began to rise to
help Dana, but she stopped him.  "Stay, Mr. Mulder.  I'll
put Caleb to bed and come back for Samantha.  You stay and
talk."

Skinner and Mulder sat down, causing Samantha to stir in
her sleep.  "Shhh, go back to sleep," he said and she
instantly fell back to sleep.  "Just like her mother,"
Mulder said to himself sadly.

Mulder and Skinner sat quietly until Dana came back for
Samantha.  She lifted her into her arms and Samantha threw
her arms around Dana's neck, snuggling into her.  Dana
smiled at Mulder, who smiled back.  She turned to Skinner
and said, "Good-night.  Tell Sharon I'm sorry I didn't get
to see her tonight, but I wish her well."

"I will," said Skinner.  "Thank you."

Watching them as they disappeared into the tent, Samantha
still sleeping, Mulder asked, "How many days before we get
to St. Joe do you think?"

"I'm hoping no more than two weeks.  We still will probably
have to lay over in St. Joe for several days at the very
least.  We're setting out early enough that if we get
delayed, we should still be fine."  Skinner paused.  "Your
father came to see me Fox.  He told me it was my ass if
anything happened to you or Samantha."

"I'm sorry about that.  I'm not your responsibility; I told
him this was my idea."

"That's all right.  What's he going to do?  He'll be too
far away to control anything that happens."

"Don't underestimate my father.  His reach is farther than
you think it is."

Skinner stood back up and dusted of his seat.  "Well, I
better be getting back.  I'll see you in the morning
Mulder."

"Good night."

Well, he thought to himself, no sense in putting this off
any longer.  Stretching as he got up, Mulder reached down
to stir the embers and placed more wood on the fire.  The
boys would appreciate the fire when they returned.  He
headed for the tent with Dog following closely behind.
Mulder turned on him.  "Oh no.  You're not going in there
with me."  Dog looked up with sad eyes, his head slightly
down.  "Don't give me that look.  You lie down right here,
outside."  Dog lay down and wagged his tail slowly.
"That's better," Mulder said to himself.

Opening the tent flap, Mulder went inside.  Dana had left
the lantern low, allowing Mulder to see.  She lay under
some covers with her son next to her and Samantha next to
him.  He pulled back the covers and slid in next to
Samantha.  Leaning on one elbow, he bent down to kiss
Samantha good night.  As he leaned back, he saw Dana
staring at him.

"Dana, you didn't have to place the children between us.
You have nothing to worry about.  I'm too tired to do
anything but sleep anyway."

Dana looked ashamed, "I don't know what you mean Fox.  I
thought you would want Samantha near you."

"Please don't call me Fox."

"Why?  You're my husband.  Do you want me to continue to
call you Mr. Mulder?  I'm sorry, but that would be too
strange."  She paused before continuing.  "Why don't you
want me to call you Fox?"

"It's personal."  Dana stared at him.  "My wife called me
Fox."

"But that woman--"

"You can call me by my middle name...William, but please
don't call me Bill either.  That's my father's name."

"Fine...William," Dana said, feeling hurt somehow.

"You don't have to say it like it's a dirty word."

Dana reached down to stroke her son's blond hair.  His
little lips puffed out as he exhaled.  Mulder watched with
her.

After some moments, he said, "You know, I'm not going to
push you into doing something you're not ready for right
now.  I'm not in any hurry either.  Let's just take this
time to get to know each other."  He saw the relief on her
face and she let out a big sigh.  He reached up to put the
lantern out.  "But, I do want more children.  So,
eventually our children won't be sleeping between us any
longer."

She said no more, but he heard her breathing increase
slightly.  He felt guilty for making her uncomfortable, but
he didn't want to lie to her.  He would accept this
arrangement for only so long.
 

May 3, 1852
Monday

The small party arrived at St. Joseph, Missouri mid-
afternoon.  They were directed to an area where they could
join with other wagons to form a larger group.  There were
more wagons than Dana had ever seen.  Mulder was amused to
see her turn this way and that, looking at all the
different people.  He followed Skinner and his family down
near the river.

Over the day, Skinner made arrangements for them to join a
larger group that would contain around seventy wagons.
Mulder and the other men were asked to come to a meeting
that evening.  Skinner explained that they would elect a
captain and come up with rules that all in the party would
follow.

Mulder returned from the meeting to find the boys smoking
pipes.  "Danny and Jimmy, I want you to stay with the wagon
because tomorrow, I'm going to take my wife and the
children to town and stay at a hotel.  My father's man
should be finding you soon with a wagon, livestock and more
supplies.  Can you take care of things for me?"

Jimmy spoke up first, "Yes, Mulder.  When are we going to
go across the Missouri?"

"Skinner says we'll cross in about a week.  He's making
arrangements to get a pilot.  We elected Skinner as captain
tonight."

"What's a pilot?" asked Danny.

"Someone who will guide us."  Mulder noticed that Dana
wasn't in sight.  "Where's my wife?"

"She went to see Mrs. Skinner.  She took Caleb and Samantha
with her."

"All right, I'm going to head over to the Skinner wagon."

Mulder walked down five wagons and stopped when he saw Dana
holding Samantha and Sharon holding Caleb as they talked
quietly.  He noticed Dana nodding her head every so often.

Skinner came out from behind the wagon, not noticing
Mulder.  "Sharon, I have the children settled down.  I
think we should turn in.  Hand me Caleb."  Skinner lifted
Caleb into his arms and said, "I'll carry him and walk Dana
back to her wagon."

"That won't be necessary," said Mulder as he came into the
light.  Dana had Samantha still in her lap and stood with
her.  Mulder reached for her and Skinner handed Caleb to
Dana.  The boy began to wake up, but Dana rubbed his back
and he soon settled back down.  Mulder turned to her and
said, "We should be getting to bed too.  I have a lot to do
tomorrow."  Mulder nodded to the Skinners and put his arm
around Dana, guiding her away from the Skinner camp.

When they were out of hearing range from the Skinners, he
said, "We're going to stay at a hotel while we're here.  I
want to check in tomorrow.  In the morning, I'll need you
to pack for our stay."

"Just us?  Not the boys?"

"No, just us.  When is your brother supposed to come to
town?"

"We had arranged to meet Saturday at the Hanson Hotel at
one o'clock."

"Well, we can easily make that."  They arrived at the tent
and Mulder pulled back the flap to let Dana in first and
then followed her.

"What do you mean 'we'?" she asked.

"I'm going with you."

Dana shook her head.  "No, I don't think so."

"Of course I am."

"Walter will go with me."

"Skinner is no longer responsible for you, I am."  Samantha
began to stir when Mulder raised his voice, but soon fell
back to sleep when he began to rock her.

"My brother will be in a foul mood when he finds out what
I've done.  It's going to be hard enough to deal with him
without you being there."

"Dana, I have every right to be there with you.  Besides,
he's your family.  I want to meet him."

"You didn't let me meet your family," she argued.

"That's different."

"How so?" Dana asked.

"Dana, don't start.  I told you I was sorry about that."

"You're ashamed of me."  She kissed Caleb softly on his
head, refusing to look up at Mulder.

"Of course I'm not.  I told you, it was simpler this way.
You'll meet them some day."

When she looked back up, she was unsure if he believed that
or not.  She tried once more.  "Please William, don't go
with us.  I'm afraid there may be bloodshed."

"Your brother would shoot me?"

"No.  At least I don't think so, but he has a violent
temper.  He may cause you some harm.  He's a big man."

"I'm not afraid.  Besides, I owe it to him and the man he
promised you to.  It's only right."

"Fine.  I'm tired of arguing with you."  Dana settled the
children into their bed and then crawled in with them.
Mulder joined her on the other side of the children.

"Dana, there's another reason I want to move to town
besides being more comfortable."

"Why?"

"The children won't be in bed with us in the hotel.  We can
get them their own bed."

"Oh," she said, suddenly feeling her stomach knot.

"Now let's go to sleep.  We have a long day ahead of us."

She heard his breath soon become steady, but it was quite
awhile before she fell asleep that night.
 
 

May 4, 1852
Tuesday

Dana packed early and they set off for the hotel where
Mulder had arranged a room the day before.  She had refused
to ride on the horse, so they used Mulder's horse to carry
their cases.  She wouldn't give him an excuse why she
wouldn't ride and after a brief argument, he had given up
and just decided that they would all walk.  Danny carried
Caleb while Mulder carried Samantha.  Mulder didn't think
Dana could carry Caleb the long distance, although she
briefly argued that point with him as well.

When they reached the hotel, Mulder and Danny set the
children down.  Mulder grabbed their bags and then handed
the reins of his horse to Danny, who was going to take the
horse back to camp.  "I'll come by in a few days," Mulder
told him before Danny left.

Mulder picked up Caleb and Dana grabbed Samantha's hand.
"Come on," he said to his family, "this is the place."

After signing in, they walked up the stairs to their room.
Mulder stood back and let Samantha and Dana go through
first.  Samantha ran to the chair by the window, climbing
in it to look out.  "Samantha, be careful," Dana told her.

Smiling, she looked back and said, "I will."  She turned
around, leaning over the back of the chair to look at the
action below.

Mulder set Caleb down, who ran to Samantha and tried to
climb on the chair with Samantha but couldn't.  His little
behind stuck up in the air with his legs swinging
helplessly.  Dana went over to him and lifted him up so
that he could look out too.  Samantha moved over so that
Caleb could share the view with her.  As he inched closer
to the back, she placed a protective arm around him.

Mulder watched the scene and felt his heart lighten.
"Dana," he whispered.  She turned around.  "Come here."
She crossed the room to him and he leaned down to lightly
kiss her on her forehead.  She smiled up at him and he
leaned down again, kissing her lightly on the lips.   They
had been sharing more easy moments like this, feeling more
comfortable with each other.  He turned her around and
pulled her against him.

"They really are becoming brother and sister," he whispered
in her ear.

"I'm happy."

"So am I."  He squeezed his arms around her and kissed her
once more on the neck.  "I'm going to go out for a short
time to see if I can arrange some things.  When I get back,
we can take the children to get some dinner.  How does that
sound?"

"I'd love to," she said as she turned back around.  "I'll
have the children take a nap.  Maybe we can walk around
town too.  Would that be okay?"

"Of course," he said.  He bent down for a final kiss, but
as he was pulling away, Dana pulled him back for a longer
kiss.

"Be back soon," Dana commanded when she released him.
Mulder smiled and left her to her tasks.

XXXXXXXXXX

They had eaten at the hotel, a chore in itself.  Caleb had
fussed and Samantha, not to be left out, whined that she
didn't like the meat.  Mulder and Dana were thankful when
they were able to step outside.  Dana bent down to pick
Caleb up.

"Dana, I can carry him," Mulder said.

"No, I'm fine.  Thank you," Dana said.  "Let's walk this
way."

Mulder reached for Samantha's hand and they set off down
the street.  They stopped to look in windows and Mulder
halted them when they came to a photographer.

"Dana, let's go inside."

She shook her head.  "It's too extravagant."

"Nonsense," he said, opening the door.

When they walked in, a young woman greeted them.  "Hello,"
she said.

Dana smiled and rocked Caleb.  "Hello."

"Are you heading west?" she asked.

Mulder laughed and rubbed his jaw, "Are we that obvious?"

The young woman smiled at him and said, "No, it's just that
we get more people coming in to have their picture taken
before they head west."

"Business is good."

She smiled again at him, "Yes, very good.  I'm Sally
Daniels.  My father can take your picture for you.  He's in
the back; would you like me to get him?"

"Yes, thank you," Mulder said.  He watched her exit through
a curtained area and felt Dana tug on his coat sleeve.

"William, we cannot afford this.  We need to save our
money.  This isn't necessary."

"Relax Dana.  I want to do this.  I haven't had a
photograph since right after Penny had Sa..."  He looked
away from her but forced himself to look back before
continuing, "Since my daughter was a baby."  Mulder turned
away from Dana and looked at the pictures that hung on the
wall.  Somber looking people stared back at him.

Dana turned around and moved to place Caleb in a chair
sitting next to a wall.  She smiled when Samantha came over
to her and stood next to Caleb, saying, "I'll watch him."

Standing back up, Dana looked over to where she had left
Mulder.  She came up behind him, placing her hand on his
back.  "It's all right you know."

Mulder looked down at her.  "What is?"

Dana smiled reassuringly.  "You can talk about her.  I
don't mind."

He looked away from her and shook his head, "But I do mind.
It's personal.  It's a part of my other life and I'm ready
to start a new life."

"You can't forget the past."

"But I can try," he said.  Just then, Miss Daniels walked
back in, followed by a man who was graying at the temples
and sporting a white beard.  Mulder turned around to shake
his hand.

"Hello, I'm Mr. Daniels.  My daughter tells me that you
would like to have your photograph taken."

"Fox Mulder.  Yes," Mulder said.  "Could we have more than
one taken?"

Mr. Daniels nodded, "Yes, what did you have in mind?"

"I would like one with the family, one with just my wife
and myself, and one with the children by themselves."

"William," Dana admonished, "that will be very expensive."

"I'm afraid your wife is correct Mr. Mulder.  It will be
expensive."

"That's fine."  Mulder looked at Dana.  "Really, it's fine.
Consider it a wedding gift from me if you must."

"Good, good," Mr. Daniels said.  "Sally, would you get the
family set up for a portrait first?  Then we'll take the
children next before they tire."

Mr. Daniels went about setting up his equipment while Sally
arranged Dana in a chair with Caleb in her lap.  Next to
her in another chair was Mulder with Samantha in his lap.

"Now, you'll need to hold very still.  Children, you need
to be very still," Mr. Daniels said.

Caleb kicked his feet.  "Caleb, be still," Dana said and
Caleb settled down.

When Mr. Daniels finished with the family, Sally placed the
children in a chair together.  Dana and Mulder stood to the
side and Caleb looked at them.  Mr. Daniels tried to get
his attention, but he was focused on Dana.

"Mrs. Mulder," Mr. Daniels said.  When Dana didn't respond,
he tried again.  "Mrs. Mulder?"

Dana still didn't respond until Mulder nudged her.  She
looked at him puzzled.  "Dana, Mr. Daniels has been calling
you."

"What?"  Dana looked over to Mr. Daniels who was beckoning
her to him.  "Oh, I'm sorry," she said as she moved towards
him.

"I think if you stand by me, your son will look into the
camera," he said, pointing to Caleb, who was indeed looking
the right way now.  "Okay children, hold still."

Dana let out a breath after the photograph was taken.  She
smiled at Mr. Daniels, "Well, I'm glad we made it through
that.  I was afraid he would..."  Just then, Caleb began
crying, reaching towards her.

"Mama," Caleb cried.  Mulder went to the children, lifting
Samantha down off the chair.  He picked Caleb up before
Dana could reach him.  He bounced him a few times, but
Caleb was intent on his mother, still reaching for her.

"Let me take him," Dana said, reaching up for him.

Caleb leaned towards her, but Mulder turned away from Dana.
"Miss Daniels, can hold him while we have our picture
taken?" Mulder asked, smiling brightly at her.

Sally smiled back.  "Yes, I'd be glad to."  She took Caleb
and bounced him.  Caleb put his fist against his mouth and
continued to cry.

Dana reached for her son, but Mulder put his arm around her
waist, blocking her from reaching him.  "He'll be all right
for a few moments Dana."  He was leading her back to the
chair where the children had been sitting.  "Let's do this
and then we can take the children back to the hotel.  Sit
down."

"But my son is crying."  She looked angrily up at him.

"He'll be fine.  Sit there and be good."  Dana sat down,
crossing her arms and glaring at Mulder as he moved back
towards Samantha.

He bent down to her level.  "Be a good girl for Papa.  Can
you do that for me?"

Samantha nodded and her eyes followed her father as he
rose.  Mulder returned to Dana and Mr. Daniels, who was
explaining to Dana that she should uncross her arms and
place them in her lap.  He wasn't having any success.  Dana
was too angry at being denied access to her son.

"Dana, listen to Mr. Daniels.  The sooner you do, the
sooner we'll get out of here."

Dana uncrossed her arms and placed them in her lap.  Mr.
Daniels positioned Mulder behind his wife, telling him to
place his hand on her shoulder.

When Mr. Daniels returned to the camera and looked, he
frowned.  "Mrs. Mulder, it isn't suggested that you smile,
but I would not recommend that you frown either."

Mulder leaned around his wife, but she refused to look his
way.  He leaned down to whisper in her ear, "Dana, do you
really want our children and grandchildren to remember you
with that expression?  Please, for just a few moments, try
not to look like a sour old maid."

Dana looked up at him shocked.  "I have never looked sour
and I am not some old maid."

"Well if you continue with this nonsense, then that's what
they will think."

"Fine," Dana said, "Mr. Daniels, I'm ready.  Please take
the picture so I can leave."

Mulder rose back up and squeezed her shoulder lightly.  Her
expression must have been satisfactory to Mr. Daniels,
because he finally took their picture.  Mulder was aware of
Caleb sniffling from the side and felt bad that he had
denied him his mother, but they would have never finished
if he hadn't insisted on Miss Daniels holding him.

"There," Mr. Daniels said.  "All finished.  You can pick up
the pictures tomorrow.  Sally will collect the money while
I begin my work.  Thank you for coming in."  He reached to
shake Mulder's hand and nodded to Dana, who nodded back.

Dana took Caleb from Sally and kissed him.  Caleb put his
head on her shoulder as she began rocking him.  She glared
at Mulder, who looked back at her with a guilty expression
on his face.

"Mr. Mulder, if you'll come over here, I'll finish things
up," Sally said.

Samantha walked over to Mulder as Dana looked out the
window.  She hated him for keeping her from reaching her
son, but she knew he was right.  Caleb would never have let
go of her when he was this fussy.  She just hated the fact
that he had ordered her in front of strangers.

She looked over to Mulder and Miss Daniels.  Mulder was
grinning and laughing at something Sally Daniels said.
Samantha bounced up and down, pulling impatiently on
Mulder's coat.  It seemed like she wasn't the only one who
wanted to leave, but Mulder didn't seem to be in any hurry.
Dana watched him lean on the countertop.  It was obvious
that they had finished their transaction, but still Mulder
continued on with Miss Daniels.

Dana had lost her patience.  She opened the door and exited
the building.  She heard a bump behind her and saw Samantha
slapping the door with her hands.  The door was obviously
too big for her to open, so Dana opened it for her and
Samantha grabbed onto her skirt.

Dana looked down at Samantha and asked, "You ready to go?"
Samantha nodded and Dana bent down to grab her hand.  "Me
too.  How about we go back to the hotel?  Are you ready for
bed?"

"Yes, please.  I'm tired."

"I'm sorry Samantha, I can't carry you too.  Do you think
you can walk by yourself?"  Samantha nodded.  "Well, let's
go then."

They walked back to the hotel and Dana wondered how long
before Mulder would realize they were gone.  She wondered
if she had done the right thing.  Mulder only seemed to pay
attention to her when she was in the immediate vicinity.
When a pretty woman came around, she seemed to fade into
the background.  Dana knew she wasn't exceptionally pretty,
but she knew that men were attracted to her.  She supposed
that Mulder had meant what he said.  He wanted a mother for
his daughter and a woman to bare his children.  Well, that
she could do.  She could live without love as long as she
had her children.

XXXXXXXXXX

When they entered the hotel, the desk clerk came to
attention.  "Hello, Mrs. Mulder.  Did you enjoy the town?
Where's Mr. Mulder?"

"Yes, thank you.  We had a pleasant walk, but the children
are tired.  Could I have the key to our room?"

The clerk reached back into a cubbyhole for her key and
handed it to her.  "Do you need help with the little girl?
She looks like she's ready to fall asleep."

"Yes, if you wouldn't mind.  When my husband returns, would
you tell him that we've already retired?"

The clerk gestured for a bellboy to help Dana with
Samantha.  "I'll do that Mrs. Mulder."

"Thank you."  The bellboy picked Samantha up and led her to
their room.  She handed the key to him and he opened it for
her.  Samantha was already falling asleep on his shoulder.

When they went in, Dana whispered to him, "Thank you for
your help.  You can place her on the bed over there."
Since it was dusk when they stepped into the hotel, the
room now had become almost dark.  He went over to light the
lantern by the window.

After the bellboy was gone, Dana removed her cape and began
to undress Caleb.  Placing him on the small bed that had
been brought in earlier, she turned to get Samantha ready
for bed.  Samantha barely woke up as Dana pulled the covers
over both the children.  Leaning down to kiss both of them,
she realized how fond she had become of Samantha.

She wondered how long it would take Mulder to arrive back
at the hotel.  Dressing in her gown quickly, she searched
through her bag and removed her bible.  She sat in the
chair by the window, opened the bible and began to read,
waiting for her husband to return.

~~~

Chapter 4

May 4, 1852
Tuesday

Dana heard the key in the lock as she slowly awoke.  She
had fallen asleep in the chair by the window waiting for
Mulder to return, more exhausted than she realized.  She
saw him glance over to the bed where the children were
sleeping.

When he spoke, his voice had a dangerous edge that Dana had
never heard.  "Where the hell have you been?  I have been
looking all over for you."

"We've been here," she said nervously.  "Didn't you think
to come here directly?  Or have you been with Miss Daniels
all of the time."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"Please do not curse William.  I just meant that you didn't
seem to notice that the children and I had left.  You
seemed very happy talking to her."

"We were talking about St. Louis.  She and her father came
here a few years ago from there."  He moved closer to her
until he was looming over her.  "I don't want you to ever
leave like that again, especially with my daughter.  You
tell me when you are leaving next time and I will escort
you.  You are not to be walking alone.  What were you
thinking?"  He turned away from her exasperated and ran his
hands through his hair.  He looked at the sleeping children
before he turned back to her.  "Let's go to bed."

Dana was startled at the abrupt change.  "What?"

"I promised that I wouldn't touch you until the children
were no longer between us.  Come to bed."

Dana stayed in the chair and Mulder turned from her.  When
he began to remove his clothes, she averted her eyes.

After he had climbed into bed, he realized that she still
had not moved.  "You're going to let me watch you undress?"

Dana shook herself.  Don't be afraid, she told herself.
It's not like you haven't done this before.  She reached
over and turned down the lantern until it quit glowing.
She faced away from him even though he would not be able to
see her from across the room with no lights.  What she
didn't realize was that he was watching her silhouette,
because there were some lights casting a light glow outside
the hotel.

She began to return to her bed when she heard him say,
"Remove everything Dana."  She gasped when she realized
that he could see more than she thought.  How did he know?
She quickly finished undressing and climbed under the
covers.  I might as well get this over with, she thought.
Hopefully he would be as quick as Jack.

She lay there quietly, but Mulder didn't move either.  She
couldn't stand the delay any longer.  "What are you waiting
for?"

Mulder waited a few moments before responding.  "I'm just
making sure the children are asleep.  We've been in such
close quarters that I can recognize when they're sleeping
by just listening to them breathe."

"Are they asleep?"

"Yes."

As Mulder moved towards her, his weight pressed down on the
bed, causing her to slide towards him.  She jumped when she
felt him.  "Sorry," he said.

"It's okay."  He leaned over her, his mustache lightly
brushing over her forehead before he turned to kiss her
cheek.  He kissed her along her jaw before he detoured
towards her lips.  She returned his kisses, much to his
delight.  It was the first response from her that even
acknowledged that he was touching her.

He kissed her on her neck and began to move down, kissing
her in the valley between her breasts.  He continued down,
kissing her stomach and then her belly button, caressing
the side of her breasts in a feathery touch with his hands.
He made his way back up to her, kissing her as he went.
When he headed for her breast, he felt her stiffen and he
changed his course, returning to her lips.

Dana felt him kiss her again and squeezed her eyes tightly
shut.  She was trying to relax, but couldn't.  She kept her
arms to her side, her hands gripped in a tight fist.  She
didn't understand why he was taking so long, why he was not
just getting this over with.

"Dana, are you all right?" he asked.

She opened her eyes and looked up to find him just inches
away.  "Yes."

She felt him move over her and settle between her legs,
bracing his arms on either side of her.  She could feel
him.  Now, she knew that this would soon be over.  She
spread her legs further, allowing him easier access and he
entered her.  She bit her lip to keep from crying out.  As
he moved, she tried to relax and the pain began to ease a
little.  Dana turned her head, but soon felt tears begin to
form in her eyes.  She heard his breathing increase and his
pace picked up.  She was grateful that this would end soon.
Finally, he collapsed on top of her.  Her arms had remained
at her side the whole time.  She unclenched her fists and
brought her hands up, pushing at his shoulders.  His weight
was causing her to lose her breath.

He rolled off of her and was quiet for a few moments.
Finally, he said, "I'm sorry.  That was painful for you,
wasn't it?"

"It's all right.  It was only in the beginning.  I expected
it to be a little."

"Why?"

"My husband...Jack said I should expect it to be painful
sometimes."

"You're kidding.  He told you that?"

Dana rolled away from him, onto her side.  "I don't want to
talk about it anymore."

He rubbed his hand down her spine and he heard her sniffle.
"Dana, you didn't touch me."

"What?"

"I said you didn't touch me.  Why?"

"Please, I don't want to talk."  He heard her sob again and
she moved away from his touch.  "I just want to go to
sleep.  I'm very tired; it's been a long day."

Mulder sighed and rolled onto his back, away from her.
Some time later, he heard her breathing deepen, but it was
a long time before he fell asleep.
 

May 5, 1852
Wednesday

When Mulder woke up, the room was lit from the morning sun.
He turned over and found the bed beside him empty.  Looking
over to the children's bed, he discovered it empty as well.
He got up, dressed, and went downstairs to the restaurant
in the hotel.  Across the room, he saw Caleb sitting on
Dana's lap and Samantha sitting next to her.  They were
eating their breakfast quietly.  Samantha saw him, jumped
out of her chair, and ran up to him.  "Good morning, Papa,"
she said.

He picked her up and kissed her cheek.  He looked towards
Dana, who avoided his eyes.  She was busy wiping Caleb's
face.  "Good morning, baby.  What have you been eating?" he
asked Samantha, licking his lips.  He looked back at
Samantha and saw strawberry jam on her cheeks.

He set her back into her chair and sat across from Dana.
The waiter came up and took Mulder's order while Dana wiped
Samantha's face.

"Good morning," he said to Dana.

"Good morning.  You didn't wake up when I got the children
ready.  I thought it would be better for me to go ahead and
feed the children since they were hungry."

"No, no, that's fine.  I'm sorry I didn't wake up in time
to come down with you."

"I managed."

"Yes, I see that."  They fell silent, watching the children
eat.

When the waiter brought his food, Mulder began eating
voraciously.  Dana smiled, and he asked, "What?"

"Nothing," she said.  "What are your plans today?"

"I have to make some arrangements for some things still.  I
need to make sure my other wagon arrived with the livestock
and supplies.  I also have to buy oxen to pull the wagons."

"We're not having the horses do that?" she asked.

"Oxen are better; they're sturdier than the horses.  We'll
still take the horses, but they won't be pulling the
wagons."  Mulder took a sip of his coffee.  "I need to go
check on the boys too.  Will you be all right by yourself
today?"

"Yes.  The children and I will be fine."

Dana didn't say anything else and he finished his meal in
silence.

Placing his fork down, he leaned back and asked, "Do you
need help with getting the children back to the room?"
Dana shook her head.  "Well, I'm going to head on out then.
I'll see you later."  Dana nodded and turned her attention
back to the children.  With one last look, Mulder stood and
headed out of the restaurant.
 

May 6, 1852
Thursday

After they had eaten their supper and returned to their
room, someone knocked on their hotel door.  Samantha raced
to open it and Mulder followed her.  When she opened it,
she took a step back.  The bellboy hesitated when he saw
Dana sitting in a chair across the room.

"Yes, what is it?" Mulder asked.

"Um, Mr. Mulder, there's someone downstairs who would like
to see you."

"Yes, who is it?"

The bellboy looked at Dana again and then leaned in to
whisper to Mulder, "It's a woman."

"A woman?  Who?" he whispered back.

"She didn't give her name, sir.  What shall I tell her?"

"Tell her I'll be down in a moment."

The bellboy left and Mulder turned to Dana.  "What was that
about?" she asked.

He whispered, "There's a woman downstairs asking to see
me."  He started chuckling and said in a normal voice.
"Who do you think that could be, Sharon?"

"I don't know.  You'd better go see who it is."

"Can I go?" Samantha asked.

Mulder looked down to see her bouncing and he nodded.
"We'll be back soon."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"No.  I just hope it's not Sharon and something has
happened to Skinner."

XXXXXXXXXX

Downstairs, Sally Daniels rose from the chair she was
sitting in.  As Mulder approached her, she said, "I'm sorry
to come here Fox, but when you didn't come for your
pictures, I thought I would deliver them myself."  Looking
down, she said, "Hello, Samantha."

"Hello," Samantha said looking around her father's leg.
She wrapped her arm around his right leg and Mulder placed
his hand on her head.

"I'm sorry.  I forgot.  I was busy yesterday and today and
didn't get to it.  You didn't have to come by though, I had
planned to come by tomorrow to get them."

Sally Daniels handed the wrapped photos and a small package
to Mulder, saying, "I didn't just bring this by, I wanted
to see you."

"See me?  Why?" Mulder asked, pocketing the smallest
package.

"I enjoyed the conversation we had.  I was hoping to speak
more to you about St. Louis.  I really miss it."

Mulder shook his head, "I'm sorry Miss Daniels, but I
really need to get back to my wife."

"Do you think we could write each other?  I would love to
know what it was like in Oregon."

"I don't think my wife would be happy if I did that.  We've
only married and everything is still new."

"And you feel she would feel threatened by me?" She smiled
and asked, "Is your wife insecure?"
 
"Papa," Samantha said.  "I want to go back upstairs."
Mulder blessed the child for her good sense in timing.

"I'm sorry, I have to go.  Thank you again Miss Daniels for
bringing these to me.  It was a pleasure to meet you."
Mulder turned Samantha around, smiled at Miss Daniels and
walked back up the stairs to their room.  When he arrived,
Dana had already changed into her gown and had Caleb tucked
in.

"Come here Samantha, let's get you changed so you can go to
bed," Dana said.

Samantha came over to her and turned around for Dana to
unbutton her dress.  "What do you have there?" Dana asked
Mulder, as she continued to get Samantha ready for bed.

"Our pictures."
 
"That lady brought them to Papa," Samantha said through her
gown.

Dana paused and asked, "What lady?  Miss Daniels?"

Mulder took the wrapping off the pictures and looked at
them.  "Yes, I forgot to get them and she brought them by.
They're really very good."  He held them out for her to see
and she nodded her approval.  "Her father is an excellent
photographer."

"Miss Daniels wants Papa to write to her."

Mulder looked over at his daughter, shocked.  He didn't
think she was paying that much attention to the
conversation.

"She wants him to write to her?  Why does she want you to
write to her?"

"I told her no."

"But why would she think that you would?"

Mulder rewrapped the pictures and put them on the bureau.
He huffed as he sat on the bed, "I don't know Dana.  I
suppose she thought..."

"She thought what?"

"Nothing.  Samantha, get into bed, I'll tuck you in."
Samantha climbed into bed, Mulder hoisting her in the end.

Samantha lay down and looked up at her father, smiling.
"Love you Papa."

"Love you too," he said, "now go to sleep."

Dana moved to their bed and climbed in, covering herself up
to her chin.  Mulder walked over to the lantern and lowered
it until it flickered out.  He walked to his side of the
bed and prepared for bed.

As he was lying down, she asked, "So, what did she think?"

"Huh?"

"Did she think that you might need another wife in the
future?  Did she let you know that she would be able to
fill that role?"

"Dana, stop.  You sound jealous."

"I'm not jealous, but I just want to know, do women always
seem to throw themselves at you?"

"She didn't throw herself at me.  I think she's just
lonely.  She found something that we have in common; we
both grew up in St. Louis."

"I didn't realize that you grew up in St. Louis."

"My father moved us to Hannibal when I was thirteen.  Now
go to sleep."

"But..."

Mulder reached for her and pulled her up against him, her
back to his front.  "No more talking.  I said I told her
'no.'  I'm tired, please, let's just sleep."

He was relieved when he heard no more from her.  He tried
to analyze the conversation with Miss Daniels at her
father's studio.  He didn't think that he said anything
that would cause her to draw a conclusion that he was
interested in her.  He was just being friendly.  He smiled,
thinking that perhaps Dana had been jealous after all.  If
she was jealous, that meant that it was possible that they
had more of a future than he could hope.  He soon followed
her in sleep.
 

May 8, 1852
Saturday

"Walter is supposed to come and get me to meet my brother."
She reached for her cup of coffee and took a sip.  "Can you
watch the children?"  Mulder glared at her.  When she
looked back up at him she asked, "What?"

"I told you, I'm going with you.  I've already arranged for
Danny to come watch the children while we're gone.  He
should be here by noon."

"And what are you going to say to Walter when he shows up?"

The waiter arrived with his food and he stabbed the eggs.
"I'll thank him for coming and then send him back to his
family.  There isn't any need for him to come along."

"You might need protection," Dana said under her breath.

"What?"

"Nothing.  Do what you think is best William; just don't
say that I didn't warn you about my brother."

"We'll be fine."

"Papa," Samantha said, "When Danny comes, can we go to the
river to watch the boats?"

"No.  You'll stay in the room."

"But I want to see the wagons cross," she said, pouting.

"Samantha, finish your breakfast."

"I am finished.  Please Papa," she whined.

"I said no.  You'll stay in your room with Caleb and
Danny."  She kicked her chair and crossed her arms.  "This
comes from my parents spoiling her.  It's a good thing I'm
getting her away from their influence.  Can you handle the
children by yourself?"

Dana nodded and said, "I'll be fine."

He turned to Samantha and kissed her on the top of her
head.  "You be a good girl for..."  He had almost said
Mama.  He couldn't understand why he was having trouble
with calling Dana that.  She would be Samantha's mother,
but he still felt like he was betraying Penny.  He started
again, "Be a good girl and I'll be back soon."  Samantha
nodded and he turned to Dana.  "I'll try not to be long."
He bent down, kissed her on the cheek, and then patted
Caleb's head.  Caleb looked up at him with a big smile on
his face.  He left Dana to watch the children.

XXXXXXXXXX

The Mulders heard a knock on their door around twelve-
thirty.  When Mulder opened the door, a smiling Danny stood
before him.

"Hello cousin, I'm not too late, am I?" Danny asked.

"No."  Mulder closed the door behind him.  "Have you
eaten?"

"Not yet.  I already miss your cooking Mrs. Mulder.  Jimmy
isn't very good and I feel I've already starved under his
care."

Dana smiled at him.  "That's kind of you to say, but I'm
sure Jimmy is doing fine."

"Well, you can order yourself room service," Mulder said.
"Just go easy and don't order too much.  I know that
appetite of yours."

Another knock sounded and Mulder returned to the door,
finding Skinner on the other side.

"Hello, Mulder.  Is Dana ready to go?"

"Skinner, come on in," Mulder said.

Skinner said his hellos and turned to Dana.  "You ready to
go?"

She shook her head.  "It seems we will not be the only two
going."

"What do you mean?"

"She means I'm coming too," Mulder said.  "Look Skinner, I
appreciate you coming here, but it's my responsibility now
to meet her brother and explain the situation."

"You plan to go?  No Mulder, I don't think that's a good
idea."

"I wouldn't be much of a man if I left it to you two to do
this.  Really Walter, you can go back to your family.  Dana
and I can take care of this."

Skinner looked to Dana and saw the resignation on her face.
"Fine.  You can go, but I'm going too."

Mulder crossed his arms and Skinner stood his ground.  "All
right, you both can go with me.  Let's just get this over
with," Dana said and picked up her cape.  She kissed both
the children and left the two men staring at each other
before they realized that they were about to be left
behind.  They quickly followed her out the door.

Outside, Mulder picked up his pace and moved to be next to
Dana.  For someone so short, she could move quickly.

When they reached the outside of the Hotel Hanson, Dana
halted her steps and Skinner ran into her.  He apologized
to her, but she didn't hear him.  Mulder realized that
neither Skinner, nor Dana was with him anymore.  He walked
back to them and turned to where she was looking.  Through
the window of the hotel, he saw a large man with red hair,
about his age.  Next to him was a stout older man with
receding, gray hair.  He turned to her and was surprised by
how pale she was.  He touched her arm and asked, "Dana?"

She startled and looked up into his eyes.  She hesitated
for a moment before saying, "I'm all right."

"Is that them?" Mulder asked.

She nodded and moved towards the entrance.  Mulder rushed
ahead to open the door for her.  She and Skinner entered in
front of him.  Her brother turned when he recognized her
and walked over to her, the older gentleman following
closely behind him.  He reached down and picked Dana up,
"Sis, it's so good to see you again."  He put her back down
and hugged her to him again.  Over her head, he stuck out a
hand and said to Skinner, "You must be Walter Skinner.  I
recognize you from Dana's description.  It's good of you to
get her here safely.  You don't know how much I appreciate
it."

Skinner shook his hand and said, "Mr. Scully, there's
something we need to tell you."

Bill Scully ignored him and looked down, saying, "Dana,
this is Mr. Irwin Sanderson.  He's the man I mentioned.
He's been a good friend to my family."

Mr. Sanderson stepped forward and said, "Mrs. Willis."  To
Bill, he said, "She's a tiny thing, Scully.  I thought you
said she was sturdy."  Dana moved back slightly in her
brother's arms when she looked up into the cold eyes of
this stranger.

"Dana is sound.  She'll do just fine.  Dana, where's Caleb
and your things?  We need to get going if we're going to
make it home before dark."

Skinner tried again, "Mr. Scully, we really need to
discuss..."

"Billy," Dana said, "please listen."

"Thank you again Mr. Skinner, but we can handle it from
here.  Irwin why don't you..."

"She's not going anywhere with you," Mulder said.  Bill
looked behind Skinner, noticing Mulder for the first time.

"Excuse me?  Who are you?" Bill asked.

"Fox Mulder, her husband."

Bill Scully narrowed his eyes.  "What the hell do you mean
you're her husband?  When did this happen?"

"We were married a couple of weeks ago.  Dana and I are
heading west to Oregon, but we felt..."

Grabbing her by the arms and turning her to face him, Bill
asked, "Are you crazy?  You never mentioned any man.  How
long have you known him?"

Dana backed away from her brother, closer to Mulder who
said, "How long we have known each other is not the point.
We're married and Dana wanted to see you and explain the
situation before we move on."

"You're not taking her and my nephew to some foreign
country."

"Scully," Mr. Sanderson said, "you never told me there was
anyone else.  You said that she was unattached."

Bill was about to answer him, but Skinner said, "Mr.
Scully, I know that this wasn't the plan, but the fact is
that Dana and Mulder are married."

"Forget it Skinner," Mulder said.  "Look, I know this is a
shock, but Dana just wanted to let you know our situation.
I think she was also looking forward to seeing your family.
We could bring our children for a visit."

"Your children?"

"Yes, Caleb and my daughter Samantha."

"I don't think so Mr. Mulder.  My sister has embarrassed me
by not keeping her end of the bargain."

"Please Billy.  I know you're angry with me, but don't let
that affect us visiting.  We may never see each other
again," Dana reasoned.

"No.  I'm sorry Dana."

Mulder wrapped an arm around her waist and said to Bill,
"We're not getting anywhere.  If you change your mind Mr.
Scully, we'll still be at the St. Joseph Hotel tonight.
Come on, it's going to be okay," Mulder said as he ushered
her out.  She took one last look at her brother.  She felt
she would never see him again; he was her last tie to her
family.  Now, she was truly on her own with only her own
family to worry about.

"When Mulder realized that Skinner wasn't behind him, he
stuck his head back in the doorway, "Skinner, are you
coming?"

"No.  I'll see you in a couple of days."

Mulder nodded and left.

XXXXXXXXXX

Back at their hotel, Dana and Mulder entered their room to
find Danny playing on the floor with Samantha.  Caleb lay
asleep in the bed.  When Dana went to check on him, Danny
said quietly, "We wore him out.  He fell asleep just a few
moments ago."

Dana turned and smiled at him.  "Thank you for taking care
of them."

Danny rose from the floor and said, "It was no trouble.  I
like being with them."

"Danny, I plan to make this our last night here," Mulder
explained.  "I want you to come and get our things tomorrow
morning.  Drive the wagon in, because I'll want to buy a
few more supplies."

"All right Mulder.  Good-bye," he said to them all as he
left.

Dana was looking out the window at the street below and
Mulder came up behind her, putting his arms around her
waist.  He laced his fingers there.  "Last night here Dana.
How are you feeling?"

She knew what he was asking.  He had left her in peace
since their first time.  She supposed she should be
thankful; most men would not have cared how she was
feeling.  Jack hadn't.  He took from her whenever he felt
like it.  How could she deny Mulder, when really he had
every right?

"I feel better," she answered honestly.

"Good, good.  Last night of civilization.  Our road ahead
is going to be rough, but I think we'll be fine.  Let's go
have supper and then we'll go to bed early.  I don't think
the children will be up for long after they eat."

Dana turned around, placing her head against his chest and
sliding her arms around his waist.  Mulder rubbed her back,
"Dana, are you really all right?"

"I'm fine.  You and the children are my family now, I don't
have any other."

"Your brother will change his mind.  He was just angry.  I
don't blame him, you shouldn't either."

"Easy for you to say.  You didn't grow up with controlling
men all your life."  She gasped and said, "I'm sorry, I
shouldn't have said anything."

"Dana, you can tell me anything.  Was your father the same
as your brother?"

She paused before deciding to answer him.  "They were
almost identical.  I married so that I could get away from
my father."

"Dana, I've been wondering.  Did you love your husband?"

Dana began to feel uncomfortable.  She didn't want to talk
about Jack with him.  She had said too much and pulled away
from him, going to Caleb to wake him.  "Caleb, get up,
we're going to go eat now."

"Dana, you're ignoring my question."

She picked Caleb up and looked Mulder in the eye.  "Yes,
yes I am.  Come on Samantha, we're going to eat."  Samantha
raced after her and Mulder had no choice but to follow.

~~~

Chapter 5

May 10, 1852
Monday

The sun was just rising over the horizon and the families
were already up and moving around.  Mulder left Dana to her
preparations for breakfast.  They were supposed to cross
the river today and the boys were packing up and gathering
the oxen.  Mulder arrived at the Skinner camp to find the
same preparations going on.

"Good morning," Skinner said to Mulder when he approached.
"Ready to cross?"

"Yes.  I'm anxious to get started."

As they were talking, a man about Mulder's age approached
Skinner.  "Mulder, this is Alex Krycek.  He's the one we've
hired to be our pilot."

Mulder shook his hand and asked, "How many times have you
crossed, Mr. Krycek?"

"Alex.  I've been across a few times.  I've scouted a
little too.  I plan to make this my last trek across
though, because I'm settling in Oregon myself."

Mulder turned to Skinner.  "When are we leaving?"

"Be ready to head down by nine.  We'll have to wait in
line, but I think we'll all cross by the end of today.
Quite a few of our party already crossed yesterday."

"We'll be ready.  How many will there be all together?"

Skinner hesitated, doing the calculations in his head.
"Around seventy wagons with over three hundred men, women
and children.  I'll see you soon Mulder."  Skinner motioned
for Alex to follow him and they turned to leave.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dana had just settled the children in the wagon for the
night when Mulder arrived back at their camp.  "Did
everyone cross all right?" she asked, climbing out of the
wagon.  Mulder rushed over to help her down.

"That's what Skinner says.  I just hope it goes this
smoothly at every crossing, but I don't think we'll be that
lucky.  Krycek says some of the rivers are dangerous."

"Who is Krycek?"

"Alex Krycek.  He'll be our pilot.  He's going to guide us
to Oregon."

Dana glanced around.  "Where are the boys?"

"Taking care of our livestock.  They'll be on watch
tonight.  All of the men will take turns being on watch."

Dana spread a blanket next to a wagon wheel and sat down,
close enough to hear the children should they need her.
Mulder sat down next to her and they listened for a while
to a fiddle someone was playing at another camp.  The music
floated softly to them.  Dog came over and laid his head on
Dana's lap and she rubbed her hand down his fur.  He
thumped his tail gratefully.

As she leaned into Mulder, he put his arm around her.  "How
long do you think it will take us to cross?" she asked.

Leaning his head back against the wheel, he sighed.  "If
all goes well, it could be as soon as a little over four
months, or if we run into trouble, it could take up to six
months."

"It's good Skinner was elected our Captain, don't you
think?"

"Yes, he's a natural leader.  I just hope our pilot is as
good as Skinner thinks he is."

"Why wouldn't he be?"

"I've heard of men leading people to their deaths.  What I
fear most is not finding water when we get to the desert."

"No water?"

"No.  Or if there is water, it could be poisonous.  I
picked up a book in St. Joe and I've been reading of the
dangers."

"Are you sorry we're going?  We can still go back home."

"No, I'm looking forward to the trip.  I think the children
will have an experience they will never forget."

"I don't think Caleb is old enough to be able to remember
it."

"He might."  Mulder reached over and scratched Dog's ears.
"He's a good boy."
 
"I told you he was.  He's always been protective."

"What?  No, I meant Caleb, not the dog."

"Oh, thank you.  Samantha is a good child too.  I think
we're fortunate."

"Yes, yes we are.  I just hope all of our children will be
as good."  Mulder smiled and placed a hand on her stomach,
"Maybe we already have one on the way."

Dana looked away, embarrassed.  "You can't tell those
things this early."

"No, but we can hope it comes true."

"I'm just glad that I won't have to worry about having a
child while traveling, not like Sharon."

"What do you mean?"

"Walter didn't tell you?"  Mulder shook his head.  "Well,
from your calculations, Sharon will have her child on the
trail.  She thinks the baby will come in about three
months.  I don't envy her."

"Are you sure about this?  To look at her, you wouldn't be
able to tell that she was going to have a child."

Dana smiled.  "I'm sure."

"I wonder why they didn't just wait another year.  Sharon
isn't young."

"No, but she's strong.  She'll be fine."

Mulder rose and said, "I need to go for a walk."

"Wait," Dana said, rising to follow him.  He continued
walking away, ignoring her.  "William, wait, what did I
say?"  But he was already gone.
 

May 11, 1852
Tuesday

The next morning, the sun rose over the horizon warming
Dana in her bed.  She looked over and saw that Mulder
hadn't returned.  The children were sleeping soundly above
her head.  She turned over to watch them for a while and
then decided to let them sleep until she had breakfast
ready.  Dressing quickly, she stuck her head out of the
canvas covering.  Danny and Jimmy talked quietly outside
the wagon.

"Good morning boys," she called.

"Mrs. Mulder," Danny said, "let me help you down."

When she was on the ground, she said, "Boys, you didn't
have to fix breakfast.  I should be doing that for you."

Danny said, "Mulder sent us here.  He said we should let
you and the children sleep."

"When did you talk to him?"

"We spoke early this morning.  We didn't expect him to help
on the watch, but he stayed anyway."  Dana turned away from
him.  "I'm sorry, did I say something?" Danny asked.

"Danny, come over here and leave Mrs. Mulder alone," Jimmy
said.

Dana turned back to them with a smile on her face.  "Boys
please, call me Dana.  We're family now."  Jimmy and Danny
smiled, pleased that she was accepting them.   "I'll just
go wake the children since you seem to have everything
taken care of."  As she was climbing back into the wagon,
she turned back and asked, "Did my husband say when he was
going to be back?"

"He said he'd be here before we leave.  He better get here
soon though because Danny has a huge appetite and there may
not be anything left," Jimmy joked.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dana dressed the children and they were soon eating the
breakfast that Jimmy had cooked.  Despite what Danny had
said earlier in St. Joe, Jimmy was a good cook.  As they
were eating, a young, attractive man with dark hair walked
up.

"Excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt, but I'm introducing
myself to everyone before we leave.  I'm Alex Krycek."

"Oh, Mr. Krycek," Dana said, standing.  "My husband
mentioned you; you're going to lead us.  You're our...what
do they call you again?"

"I'll be your pilot ma'am.  And please call me Alex."

Dana smiled.  "Will you get us across safely?"

"I intend to ma'am.  I've made this trip several times and
I've been a scout for the army."

"My husband says that this can take anywhere from four to
six months.  How long do you think it will take?"

"God willing, a little over four..."

"Mr. Krycek," Mulder said as he walked up behind him.  "Can
I help you?"

Alex turned to shake his hand.  "Mr. Mulder, I didn't
realize this was your camp.  You didn't tell me you had
such a beautiful wife," Alex said, smiling broadly at Dana
and winking.  Dana smiled back shyly.

Mulder scowled and moved behind Dana, placing an arm around
her waist.  "Shouldn't you be getting near the front?  I
thought we were taking off soon Krycek."

"Alex, call me Alex.  And I'm sorry, I didn't catch your
name," he said to Dana.

Dana opened her mouth to speak, but Mulder spoke instead.
"It's Mrs. Mulder."

"Well, Mrs. Mulder," Alex said, reaching for her hand and
kissing the back of it.  "It's been a pleasure.  Mr.
Mulder."  He tipped his head to Mulder and left Dana
speechless.

XXXXXXXXXX

"I thought he was very charming," Dana said as she finished
packing up the last few items in their wagon.

"He shouldn't have touched you or talked to you like that.
I can feel he's going to be trouble."

"Nonsense, I liked him."

"It's not your place to like him."

"My place?  What does that mean?

"Your place is being a good wife and seeing to my needs and
my children's needs.  Not to flirt with a man...a single
man at that."

"I was not flirting.  You sound like a jealous man."

"I'm not jealous.  Telling you that you were beautiful," he
huffed.

She turned away, hurt by his words.  Alex had said she was
beautiful.  It had been a long time since someone had said
that to her.  Not even Jack had said that and certainly
Mulder had never given her any words of endearment.

"Come on, I'll help you out of the wagon."

Dana felt the tears fall down her face.  With her back to
him, she said, "I still have a few things to do.  You go
ahead."  She felt him leave and turned around to sit down.
She couldn't believe his words had hurt her so.  This
marriage was going to be more complicated that she thought.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder's second wagon, led by Danny, contained all the
supplies.  Mulder's father had sent a milk cow, which was
tied to the back.  Jimmy led the first wagon, which
Mulder's family now slept in.  Dana and Samantha walked
near the back of the first wagon, watching Caleb bob up and
down, playing a sort of hide-and-seek game.  They laughed
at his silliness and soon, he disappeared for good.  Dana
assumed he had tired himself out.

"Samantha, would you like to ride in the wagon too?" Dana
asked her.

The little girl grasped her hand and swung their arms.
"I'm not a baby.  I can walk."

Smiling, Dana said, "All right, but you're too big to
carry.  As soon as you look like you're getting tired, up
you go."

Samantha nodded and asked, "Where's Papa?"

Dana sighed and shaded her eyes, trying to spot him through
the wagons.  She shook her head.  She hadn't seen him since
he left her in the wagon that morning.  When she came out,
he was gone, taking his horse.  Jimmy had said that he was
heading up front with Skinner and Krycek.

XXXXXXXXXX

At about noon, the train pulled to a stop for a layover
near a creek.  The oxen grazed as Dana pulled out bacon,
bread, and water.  Mulder still hadn't returned, but Danny
said he had promised to be back to eat.

After eating their lunch, Dana put Caleb and Samantha on a
quilt and they soon fell asleep.  Dog lay down next to
them, guarding the children.

After making sure that Jimmy would watch the children, and
since Mulder hadn't returned, Dana decided to take a short
walk along the creek.  The flowers were just beginning to
bloom across the field and Dana reached down, pulling up a
blue flower.

"The blue of that flower compares nothing to your eyes,
Mrs. Mulder."

Dana turned around to see Alex Krycek staring at her.  "Mr.
Krycek, how are you?"

"Doing well Mrs. Mulder.  And it's Alex."

Dana smiled as he moved closer.  "All right Alex.  And I'm
Dana."

"Dana, that's a lovely name."

Dana blushed and said, "Mr. Krycek...I mean Alex, I don't
think my husband would appreciate us being alone here."

Alex looked around, seeing families close by.  "We're
hardly alone."  He turned back to her and continued, "In
fact, you can forget about being alone on the trail.  It
will be hard to find a moment's peace to yourself."

Dana observed Mulder ride by on his favorite horse, Baron,
not noticing Alex and Dana.  Alex turned in the direction
she was looking.  "Ah, there's your husband now.  Could I
walk you back or would you like to stroll a bit?"

"I'm sorry, but I think I should get back to our camp.  My
husband hasn't eaten yet."  Alex moved to follow her, but
she raised her hand to stop him and she felt his chest come
up against her hand.  It seemed like an eternity before she
realized what she had done.  She felt his heart beating
under her hand.  Flushing and dropping her hand, she said,
"I'm sorry, I have to go."  She picked up her skirts and
hurried back to her camp.  Krycek watched her with a grin.
Mulder doesn't know what he has there, Krycek thought.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder was dishing his food out when he heard her, "Where
have you been?"

"I was just walking.  Have you found everything all right?"

Mulder nodded, chewing on a piece of bacon.  He scanned the
nearby camps and saw Krycek walking, staring in their
direction.  Mulder stared back at him in a challenge.

When Krycek had passed, he sat down and rested the food on
his lap, waving his hand in the direction of the children.
"Did they eat?"

"Yes, of course.&nbs