By:  Nantglyn
nantglyn@yahoo.com
 

Keywords:  MSR, Angst, Historical AU
Rating:  R, to be safe
Disclaimer:  Characters are not mine.  Just for fun, not
for profit.
Archive:  I'll post to Gossamer.
Note:  Any errors are my own.  This is not a WIP.

Summary:  A new life lay ahead for many who traveled the
Oregon Trail.  This is just one story.
 

Chapter 10

July 3, 1852
Saturday

Mulder rode up on his horse as the company was preparing to
stop for the evening.  Dana was walking with Danny when she
heard him come up behind them.

"Dana," Mulder called to her.  She walked over to him and
he smiled.  "You look much better."

"It feels fine," she said, rotating her ankle.  "I walked
on it all day today."

He jumped down from his horse. "Good."  He turned away from
her as he said, "Because I invited Diana and her family to
supper.  Hey Jimmy," he called, trotting up to him.

"William," Dana called.  He paid no attention to her and
talked to Jimmy instead, who looked uneasily at Dana.
"William," she called again.

"You just going to ignore her?" Jimmy asked.

"No," he said, hanging his head.  He stopped walking and
waited for Dana to catch up to him.

When she reached him, she asked, "You invited them?"

He bit his lower lip and nodded.  He released it and said,
"Remember, we asked Diana a couple of days ago and you," he
waved his hand in the air, "had your accident and we had to
postpone it."

She put her hands on her hips and said, "No, William, you
invited Diana, not we.  Now her sister and children are
coming too?"

"Yes.  Please do this for me, Dana."  She turned around and
headed back for Danny.  "Dana," he called.  "Will you do
it?"  She nodded, not looking back.

XXXXXXXXXX

Danny was taking care of the oxen that evening while Mulder
walked over to Diana's camp.  When he returned with Diana,
her sister and her children, they found Dana cooking over
the fire.  Jimmy was helping her prepare the meal.

"Hello," Mulder said to Jimmy.

"Mulder," he said sharply.  He looked up briefly at Mulder
and then looked away.  Jimmy dished up a plate for himself
and Danny and then left, probably heading for his brother.

Great, Mulder thought, my own cousin is mad at me too.
"Smells great," he said.  He noticed that Dana still hadn't
looked his way.  Instead, she busied herself with getting
the meal.

Diana walked up to her and asked, "Dana, could I help?"

Dana looked up for a moment and then said, "No."  She
prepared three plates and walked away, cautiously carrying
them to the children who were seated on a blanket.  She sat
down between Caleb and Samantha and began silently eating
with the children.

Mulder walked over to her, squatted down, and whispered,
"Dana, we have company."

She shook her head and looked at him in the eye.  "You have
company.  I don't."

"But you promised to have them over."

"No, I promised to cook.  I didn't say I would serve them
or talk to them.  They're your guests, you take care of
them.  Diana only wants your company anyway.  I'm sure she
would prefer it if the children and I weren't here."

"Damn it Dana," Mulder hissed.

"Please do not curse in front of the children," she said.
She turned back to her meal and began to eat again.

Mulder huffed and stood, walking back to Diana.  "I'm sorry
about this."

"Don't worry Fox.  I know she doesn't like me.  She feels
threatened by me."

Mulder looked back over to Dana.  "No, I don't think so."

"She knows we're friends.  I think she would prefer to have
you to herself.  We could leave if you would like."

Mulder smiled.  "No, let's eat.  I promised you a meal."

Dana looked over to see Mulder smiling.  She watched them
walk over to her food and dish some out.  Mulder looked
back at her when he handed a plate to Diana and Dana looked
away.  From under her eyelashes, she watched them sit by
the other wagon, away from her, and noticed that Diana's
sister was very quiet, the conversation being held mostly
between Mulder and Diana.

Dana sighed and looked down at the children.  She pulled
Caleb's bangs away from his forehead.  "Finished?" she
asked.  Caleb nodded.

"Me too," Samantha said, holding up her plate.  Dana placed
her plate, along with the children's together and stood.

"Do you want to go to the river with me?" she asked them.

"Yes," they yelled, drawing Mulder and Diana's attention.

Dog followed them as they began walking away.  "Where are
you going?" Mulder shouted to them.

Dana ignored him and led the children away with her.  Dog
followed closely behind.  "Guess I'm in trouble," he told
Diana.

"I don't want to come between you and your wife Fox, but I
would be dishonest if I didn't say that I don't want to
lose your friendship either."

"You're my friend," Mulder said.  "She's just going to have
to get used to the idea."

Diana took his hand and said, "Thank you Fox.  I do value
our friendship.  You know, I've tried to talk to her, but
she doesn't seem interested."

Mulder nodded.  "I know you've tried."  He looked in the
direction Dana had left with the children.  "I think I had
better walk you back to your camp.  I don't think you
should be here when she comes back."

"All right, if you think that's best."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder had arrived back at their camp before Dana, so he
headed towards the river.  He stopped when he saw her
seated and laughing.  Samantha sat quietly next to her.
Caleb laughed as Krycek threw him up and then caught him on
the way down.

Krycek was the first to see him.  "Mulder, did you seen
Diana and her family home?"

Dana looked up at him, horrified that he had said anything.
"Shh," she said to him.

Mulder stopped in mid-stride, but recovered.  "Yes, before
I came here.  What are you doing with my son?"  Mulder drew
Caleb out of Krycek's arms.

"He enjoyed it Mulder," Krycek said.

"It looked dangerous.  If you had dropped him..."

"Caleb was fine," Dana said.

Mulder looked in her direction and put out his hand.  "Come
on."

Dana shook her head and said, "I'm not finished talking to
Mr. Krycek."

Mulder bent down and grabbed her arm, pulling her up
roughly.  "Samantha, grab the plates.  We're going back."

"Hey Mulder," Alex said, grabbing the arm Mulder was
holding Dana with.  "Let her go.  We were only talking."

"Stay out of my business, Krycek...and stay away from my
family.  Go find your own."  Krycek took a step back and
Mulder swung Dana around.  He pushed her in the direction
of their camp.  "Stay away from that man."

She turned around and stopped.  Mulder almost knocked her
down, but she found her footing.  "I can't have any friends
but you can with that woman?  That's not fair."

"No, you can have friends...just not him."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't like him."

"I don't like Diana, but you seem to be very friendly with
her."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing," she said and turned to walk again.

"Dana, you're a woman," he said as he caught up to her.

"I'm a woman, so it's not okay for me?  Diana's a woman and
you seem to think it's fine to flaunt your relationship
with her in front of everyone.  Do you know what people
must be saying?"

"I don't care what people say."

"But I do," she said quietly as she grabbed Samantha's
hand.

They walked silently until they reached the camp.  Mulder
handed Caleb to her and said, "I'm on watch.  I won't be
back until morning."  He turned away from her without
another word.
 

July 4, 1849
Wednesday

The company had decided to go only a short distance so that
they would have time to celebrate Independence Day.  In the
afternoon, the women were busy preparing pies and food.
The company had decided to have a big supper together and
everyone was pitching in.

The weather was cold and the clouds threatened snow, but it
couldn't dampen the travelers' spirits.  After Dana
finished cooking, Jimmy and Danny helped Dana carry the
food.  Samantha walked with Caleb, making sure he stayed
with them.  Dana hadn't seen Mulder since their
confrontation.

When everyone gathered, Reverend Byers said a blessing and
the families lined up to fill their plates with food.
Everyone was looking forward to the feast, since the women
put forth their best efforts to please everyone.

Someone told Dana that Mulder was helping herd the cattle a
short distance away since there was relatively good
grazing.  They would bring the cattle back before dark,
into the corral the wagons created.

Skinner came up to Dana, who sat with the children.  "Dana,
come eat with us.  I know Sharon would enjoy the company."

Dana smiled at him and said, "All right.  Thank you.  Could
you carry Caleb's plate?"

"Sure," he said, grabbing the plate.

After gathering her blanket and throwing it over her arm,
Dana turned to get Samantha's plate, but she held on.  "I
can do it," Samantha said.

Shaking her head, Dana grabbed the plate from her.  "But if
you drop it, you won't have anything to eat.  I better do
it."  Samantha crossed her arms and pouted.  "Come on, I
know you're hungry," Dana said as they followed Skinner.

When they arrived at Skinner's wagon, Sharon was sitting in
a chair.  She smiled and said, "Dana, I'm so glad you
came."

Dana spread her blanket next to Sharon and sat down.  "Me
too."

Louisa and Margaret came up to her and Margaret asked, "Can
Caleb and Samantha eat over there with us?"

Nodding, Dana handed her Samantha's plate.  "Yes, that
would be fine.  You'll need to get Caleb's plate from your
father."

"Great," Louisa said.  She turned to Caleb and Samantha,
grabbing their hands.  "Come on, you're eating with us."

Dana watched the girls take her children with them and
said, "You have such wonderful children."

Sharon watched them for a moment.  "Yes, Walter and I are
lucky."

Skinner sat on the other side of his wife and said, "It's
all her doing.  She's a great mother."

Shaking her head, Sharon said, "Now Walter, you know you
had something to do with it too."

Skinner laughed and popped a piece of meat into his mouth,
"I guess so."

Dana was surprised to see Mulder walk up with a plate in
his hand and sit down next to her.  He nodded to her and
began eating.

"Everything all right out there Mulder?" Skinner asked.

Mulder nodded and wiped his fingers on his pants.  "It
looks like it could snow though."

Looking upwards, Skinner said, "I think you're right.  It
sure seems like it's cold enough for it.  Who would have
thought it would be this cold in July?"

"At least we should see less sickness now that we're past
Fort Laramie.  They say that once you pass the fort, less
die."

"I hope that's true," Sharon said.

"How are you doing Sharon?  I'm sorry, I should have
asked," Mulder said.

"I'm fine.  Hopefully, this baby will come soon."

They ate silently for a while, watching the children.  When
the children finished, the girls and the Mulder children
came running up to them.  "Can we go play now?" Louisa
asked.

Sharon said, "All right, but don't go to far."

Mulder stopped them.  "Caleb, come here.  You stay with us.
Samantha, you can go."

Caleb walked over to him and began crying, not wanting to
be left behind.  "Mr. Mulder, we'll take good care of him,"
Louisa said.

"I'm sure you would, but not this time.  Just keep a good
eye on Samantha."

"All right," she said.  "Come on Samantha."

Mulder watched them run off as he pulled Caleb into his
lap, rubbing his back as Caleb sobbed.

"William, they could have taken him," Dana said.

Standing, Mulder lifted Caleb into his arms.  "No, we're
going to go for a ride.  How does that sound Caleb?  Do you
want to ride on the horse?"  Caleb hiccupped and nodded.
"We'll see you in a little while."

Dana stood and came over to him.  "No, I don't want him on
the horse."

Turning his back on her, he walked back to their wagon,
Dana following him the whole way.  When they arrived at the
wagon, Mulder put Caleb on his horse, but was stopped by a
hand on his arm.

"Why are you doing this?  I don't want my son on a horse."

Mulder put his hand on Caleb's leg to make sure he stayed
in place.  "I promised him a ride a while back and I
thought this might be the perfect time."

"No, you can't take my son."

"No?  You're telling me 'no?'  Well he's my son now and he
needs to get used to being on a horse.  The sooner, the
better."

"Please, don't do this."

"What is it with you and horses Dana?  You don't want to
ride on one.  You don't want Caleb to ride on one.  I would
have thought you would have been raised with horses."

"Papa, come on."

Dana looked away and said, "Fine.  Go," and stalked back
towards the Skinner wagon.

Mulder shook his head and looked back up at Caleb, who was
grinning.  "Ready to go buddy?"  Caleb nodded his head and
kicked his feet.  "Okay, just let me get up there with you.
Okay, here we go," he said as they trotted off.

XXXXXXXXXX

The livestock was grazing quietly as the sun began to fall
on the horizon.  Mulder rode up to Danny. Caleb sat quietly
in front of him.

"Who do you have there Mulder?" Danny asked.

"Me," Caleb said.

"I see that.  You're a big boy now," Danny said, reaching
to tickle him.   Caleb giggled and moved back closer to
Mulder.  "I can't believe Dana let you bring him."

"She didn't want me to."

"She going to be mad at you then?"

"Probably, but it isn't like she isn't already mad at me
anyway."

"Diana?"

Mulder nodded.  "So, I might as well have her mad at me all
at one time.  Are you all ready to head the cattle back to
camp?"

"We were just about to.  We figure that everyone has eaten
by now.  You sure you want to help with him along?"

"We'll be fine.  We'll just stay in the back."

"All right, see you in a little while."  Danny kicked his
horse and took off towards another rider.

"You having fun Caleb?" Mulder asked.  Caleb nodded and
reached to pet Mulder's horse.  "Good.  You can help Papa
round up the livestock."  Mulder guided his horse to the
back as the other men began rounding up the animals.

XXXXXXXXXX

When Caleb and Mulder arrived back at camp in the dark, the
men were finishing with the animals.  Jimmy had beat Mulder
back to their wagon, so Mulder handed Caleb down to him.

"Have fun Caleb?" Jimmy asked.

"Yes," Caleb said, his eyes drooping.

"Tired him out did you?" he asked Mulder.

"Too much excitement," he said, taking Caleb from him and
handing the reins of his horse to Jimmy.  "Is she in the
wagon?"  Jimmy nodded.  "Okay, take care of my horse."
Mulder carried Caleb to their wagon and hoisted him up.
When they entered the wagon, Caleb and Mulder found Dana
with Samantha in her lap, brushing her hair.

Samantha looked up and said, "Papa."  She tried to go to
Mulder, but Dana held her in place.

"Oh no you don't.  Not until I'm finished."

"Dana, you can do that in a minute, let her go."

"She's my daughter and I say that she needs to learn to be
patient and wait until I'm finished."

Mulder hesitated before saying, "Okay, I guess I deserved
that."

Caleb walked over to his mother and said, "I ride, Mama."

Dana smiled at her son and said, "You had fun?"  Caleb
nodded.  "I'm glad."  She reached over and pulled him into
a hug, kissing his head.  "Go have Papa get you ready for
bed."

As Caleb was walking back to Mulder, he lost his footing
when the wagon rocked from the wind that had been
increasing.  "Oops," Caleb said.

Mulder walked over to help him up.  "Oops is right.  That
wind is really beginning to pick up.  Where are his
clothes?"  Dana pointed and he picked them up and began to
change Caleb.  "Still mad at me?"

"No, not really," Dana said.  "There," she said to
Samantha.  "Finished."  Samantha got up and went to get her
gown.  "Need help?"  Samantha nodded and Dana began to
change her as Mulder was finishing with Caleb.

"Climb in Caleb."  Mulder covered him up as the wagon
rocked again.  "I think it's going to be like that all
night.  I doubt we'll get much sleep."  Samantha came over
to him and he helped cover her too.  He bent down to kiss
them both and said, "Okay, sleep now."  They nodded and he
turned back to Dana, "You ready to turn out the light?"

"Yes, I'm ready," she said, gathering her gown.

When they had both settled under the covers, Mulder asked
her, "You sure you're not mad?"

Dana rolled towards him.  "I'm not.  Sharon made me realize
that I have to start letting you make decisions about Caleb
too."

"Still mad about Diana?"  Dana didn't answer and he said,
"You are."

"I'm sorry, I just can't like her.  I believe she would be
happier if I wasn't here."

"I don't know what I can say to make you believe that isn't
true.  She's happy for me.  I don't know why you won't
believe that."

"Fine William," she said, rolling away from him.  "Believe
what you want."

Mulder huffed and rolled on his side, away from her.  The
air in the wagon was chilly from more than just the cold
temperatures outside that night.
 

July 8, 1852
Thursday

"Where have you been?" Dana asked Jimmy when he returned to
their camp that evening.

"He's been seeing the young widow," Danny said before Jimmy
could answer.

"Who?" asked Dana.

"You know, Catherine Tanner.  The woman who lost her
husband on the river about a month back."

"Oh yes, I remember."  Dana looked over to Jimmy and asked,
"So you're seeing her?"

"Yes," said Jimmy.

"Are you two serious?"

"No, not yet."

"You need to bring her by.  Maybe ask her to dinner one
evening."

Jimmy smiled at her.  "Thank you, Dana, I'll do that."
Danny got up and put a few more buffalo chips on the fire
to keep the meal warm.  "Where's Mulder?  Has he eaten
yet?"

Dana shook her head.  "He's on the first watch."

"I'll take the food to Mulder if you want me to."

"Thank you.  I'm sure he would appreciate it."

Mulder and Dana had finally begun to get back to normal
after the Fourth.  Dana had vowed to herself to ignore
Diana and Mulder's friendship since he was determined to
have it.  She realized that there was no reasoning with
him.
 

July 9, 1852
Friday

When Dana woke up the next morning, she saw that Mulder
still hadn't returned.  She dressed the children and
herself before finding him sitting by the fire.

"I'll have breakfast for us soon," she said to him.  "Did
you sleep?"

He shook his head.  "No, I was called to the Baxter wagon
to help."

She came up to him and ran her hand through his hair.  He
leaned into her as he closed his eyes, enjoying the
soothing feeling.  "Why?"

"There was an incident there."

"An incident?  What does that mean?"

"Jacob Nelson is dead.  You remember, the driver I hired.
He was stabbed in his sleep last night.  Mrs. Baxter and
her young son are also missing.  We've been out looking for
them.  I plan to go back and help as soon as I get
something to eat."

She went to their supply wagon to get food for them.  As
she prepared the bacon and bread, Mulder sat, silently
watching her.

"How old is her son?" Dana asked.

"About Samantha's age."

"Do they think someone took them after they killed Mr.
Nelson?"

"Diana said Sarah's become more emotional this week.  She's
still very upset about losing her husband.  She said that
last night; Sarah cried and then went very silent, rocking
Randolph.  That's the boy."

"Are you saying that Sarah did this?"

"Possibly."

"When did Diana notice them missing?"

"Around three this morning.  She woke up and found Nelson
dead.  She couldn't find Sarah or the boy.  If we don't
find them today, I don't think they'll survive another
night if it's as cold as it was last night.  Diana said
neither one of them has a coat with them."

When Mulder had finished eating, he jumped on his horse and
took off.  Dana was surprised to find him back at camp two
hours later.

When she saw his expression, she asked, "What's wrong?
Have they found them?"

Mulder nodded and dropped down by the fire.  "They're not
alive."

"Neither?  What happened?"

"I don't think it's something I want to describe to you."

"Was it an accident?"

"No."  He looked up at her before looking back down.  "She
had a knife with her.  It looks like she was the one who
killed Nelson too."

"Oh.  When will they be burying them?"

"Reverend Byers will hold a service around two.  We're
going to stay here until tomorrow.  I don't think anyone is
in the mood to go on today.  I just came back here to clean
up.  I need to go back and help."

"Can you at least see your children?  They haven't seen you
since early yesterday."

Mulder looked up at her, remorseful.  "I'm sorry, of
course.  Where are they?"

"Sharon's girls came to get them this morning after you
left."

"I'll go over there then after I wash up."  As an
afterthought, he asked, "Do you need me for anything?"

"No, I'll get you something to clean up with.  Stay where
you are and rest."

After he had cleaned up, Mulder headed for the Skinner
wagon, leaving Dana alone, yet again.

XXXXXXXXXX

Most of the company joined Reverend Byers for the funeral
service.  Jimmy and Danny stood behind Dana, who held
Caleb.  Samantha stood next to her, holding onto Dana's
skirts.  Looking over to the family, Dana saw Mulder
standing beside Diana, her nieces standing on her other
side.  As the Reverend read, Diana broke down, crying.
Mulder put his arm around her and she leaned into him.  He
bent down and whispered something to her.  Dana saw her nod
and lean even more into him.

Dana looked away and kissed her son, rocking him.  She was
thankful that he was tired.  He had been fussy earlier, but
seemed to sense the solemn occasion and was cooperating.

Danny leaned into her and whispered, "Dana, do you want me
to take him?"

She shook her head.  "He's fine."

When the services were over, people began walking away
quietly.  Dana watched Mulder walk with Diana.  He passed
by her and didn't even acknowledge her or the children.

A young woman walked up to them and smiled at Jimmy.  To
Dana, she said, "Mrs. Mulder, I'm Catherine Tanner.  Please
call me Katie though."

"Oh, it's nice to meet you.  Jimmy has told me a lot about
you."

Katie blushed and looked up at Jimmy.  "Thank you.  It's
nice to meet you too."

"Dana, do you think Katie could eat with us tonight?" Jimmy
asked.

Dana smiled at Katie.  "Of course, we could use the
company.  Jimmy can come and get you when we're ready," she
told Katie.  "Did he tell you he could cook?"

"Yes, he's very good too."

"Yes he is.  Well, good afternoon Mrs. Tanner.  I'll see
you this evening."

Dana grabbed Samantha's hand and walked away, leaving Danny
and Jimmy to talk with the young widow.

Instead of going back to her own wagon, Dana decided to
visit Sharon.  As she walked in that direction, she passed
the Baxter wagon.  She saw Mulder sitting next to Diana,
who was enfolded in his arms crying.  The two girls sat by
themselves quietly.  Samantha saw her father and began to
pull in that direction.  "Papa," she cried.

"Samantha shh, he's busy.  You come with me."

"No, I want to go to Papa."

Mulder looked up when he heard her calling him.  Samantha
pulled free and Dana called to her, but it was too late.
She was already heading for her father.  Caleb struggled in
Dana's arms to follow her and Dana had to put him down for
fear of dropping him.  He took off in the same direction.

When Samantha reached him, she tried to crawl into his lap,
but Diana was in her way.  Dana was sure she would back
away so that Samantha could go to him, but she didn't move.
She just kept crying and holding on.  Caleb had caught up
and tried to join his sister, which made matters worse.

"Diana," Mulder said as Dana reached him.  "The children."

"I'm sorry, they broke free when they saw you," Dana
explained.

"It's all right," Mulder said.

Diana leaned back, allowing the children access to Mulder.
She looked up and said, "Oh, Dana.  Hello."

"I'm sorry about your family.  If you need anything, let me
know."

Diana nodded and moved to her nieces.  Mulder bent down,
kissed both children, and then asked, "How come you're not
at our wagon."

"I'm going to see Sharon.  Her baby could come any day and
I wanted to see if I could do anything to help."  Dana
reached down and grabbed both of the children's hands.
"Come on, Papa is busy now," she said to the children.
"Will you come back to our wagon later?  Jimmy has asked
his girl to supper."

Mulder looked over to Diana and shook his head.  "I don't
think I can leave her in this condition."

Dana nodded and pulled the children away.  She glanced back
and saw Diana return to his arms.

When Dana reached the Skinner wagon, she found Walter
outside.  "Hello, Walter."

"Dana," he said.  He bent down and said to the children,
"Come to Uncle Walter."  The children ran into his arms and
he picked them up.  "Oh, you're both getting so big."  They
giggled and when he put them down, they went off in search
of his daughters.

"How are you Dana?"

"I'm fine, and yourself?"

"Good.  Good."

"I was coming to see if Sharon needed anything."

"She's at the back of the wagon.  I'm sure she'll be happy
to see you."  Skinner put his arm around her as they walked
to the back.  "How are you doing?  Is everything going all
right with you and Fox?"

"As well as can be expected, I guess.  He's with Diana
right now."

"Really.  Still?"

"She couldn't tear herself away from his arms."  Dana
looked up, ashamed.  "I'm sorry, that's not fair.  She's in
a difficult situation.  Now, she doesn't have a man with
her wagon."

"Diana's strong from what I've seen.  I think she'll be
fine."

"Especially since she'll have my husband's full attention."

"Who has his attention?" Sharon asked as they came around
to the back of Skinner's wagon.

Dana smiled.  "Doesn't matter.  I just wanted to see if I
could do anything for you."

Sharon rubbed her belly and said, "No, Walter is good to
me.  He takes care of everything for me."

Dana nodded and said, "He's a good husband."

"You have a good husband too," Sharon said.

"When I see him."

"Are things not going well with you?"

"He's with Diana right now," Skinner said as he went
looking for the children, who had wandered off.

"Oh.  Well I'm sure he's just being a good friend," Sharon
reassured her.

"I'm sure," Dana said.  She shook her head and smiled.
"How are your children?"

Sharon nodded and patted the ground beside her for Dana to
sit.  "They're fine.  Victor has been riding with his
father and Matthew has been helping me.  The girls of
course love your children.  And Francis, well Francis stays
pretty close to me."

"You have wonderful children Sharon.  I just hope all of my
children turn out as well."

"They will.  Dana, you do promise to be there when this one
arrives, right?"

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it.  How is Walter handling
it?"

"The longer it goes, the more nervous he gets.  How about
you?  Any chance you might have another one?"  Dana smiled
shyly and looked away.  "What?  Are you?"

"I don't know.  I can't be sure, it's too early."

"But it's possible?"

She smiled openly.  "It's possible."

"Have you said anything to Fox?"

Dana looked down and shook her head.  "I won't say anything
until I'm sure."  She looked up quickly.  "Please don't say
anything to anyone else, not even Walter."

Sharon looked at her puzzled.  "All right, I won't say
anything if you don't want me to."

Breathing a sigh of relief, she said, "Thank you.  Are you
sure I can't do anything for you?"

"No, I'm fine.  Just be there when I really need you."

"I will."  Dana stood.  "I have to go get the children now.
Jimmy is having company tonight."

"Oh?  Who?"

"The Tanner widow."

"Really?  Do you think there's a future there?"

"Maybe.  He seems smitten."

"That's good."

Dana bent down and kissed Sharon lightly on the cheek.
"Good-bye Sharon."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Thank you for the meal Mrs. Mulder," Katie Tanner said.

"You're welcome.  It's nice to have someone else eat with
us," Dana said.  "Are your parents back home?"

"Yes.  My husband and I lived in Ohio.  He and his family
decided to come west, so here I am."

"Do you get along with your in-laws?"

"Yes.  They've been very good to me."

"That's good," Dana said.

"How about you?"

"Me?"

"Did you get along with your in-laws?  I mean I heard
stories about how hard it is for the wife sometimes, but I
think I was fortunate."

Dana shrugged her shoulders.  "I've never met mine."

"Really?  Are they not living?"

"No.  There just wasn't time to meet them."

"Are you ready to go back Katie?" Jimmy asked.

"Yes," she said, standing and linking her arm with Jimmy.
"Thank you again Mrs. Mulder."

"You're welcome.  Good-night."

Dana walked around, picking up their plates.  She rinsed
them off along with their cups.  "Danny, I'm going to bed.
If William comes back, tell him so, will you?"
 
"All right Dana."

Dana climbed into the wagon, being careful to step over the
children.  She leaned down and kissed them both.

After changing, she lay under her covers.  She had almost
fallen asleep when she heard Mulder climb in.  She remained
quiet and listened to him remove his boots and lie down.
He lifted the covers and crawled in beside her.  Leaning
over, he kissed her on the cheek and pulled her against
him.  "Sorry I didn't come sooner.  Diana was still having
a rough time."  He felt her nod.  "You okay?"

"Yes.  I'm just tired."

He settled his chin on the top of her head and stroked her
hair.  "Danny said the widow Tanner came over tonight.  Was
she nice?"

"Yes, I think Jimmy likes her very much."

"Good.  Do you think they might marry?"

"I don't know."

"If they do, they should wait until we get to Oregon."

"Why?"

"You never know what will happen on the trail," Mulder
explained.  "Look what happened to Diana's family.  She's
lost her sister, brother-in-law, and nephew."

"I still don't understand why Mrs. Baxter did that.  I
can't even begin to understand how she could kill her
child."

"I'm sure she wasn't thinking clearly.  She couldn't have
been sane."

Dana nodded.  She felt a need to change the subject.  "Are
we really leaving tomorrow?"

"Yes."  Mulder ran his hand down her back.  "Dana, I told
Diana I would help her with her wagon."  He felt her
stiffen, but continued, "She needs help with the team.  She
can't drive it herself.  I feel responsible, she's my
friend."

"There isn't anyone else?  Maybe one of the boys could help
out and you could drive one of our teams."

"No, Diana trusts me."

Dana leaned over him, on an elbow.  "So what, you're going
to drive her team all the way to Oregon?"

"Of course not," he said, pulling her back down.  "I'll
arrange something soon.  It may just take some time."

"Fine William," she said.  "Go to her."  Dana moved as far
away from him as she could.  "In fact, why don't you just
go to her now?  I'm sure that's what she wants."

Mulder reached over and put his hand on her back, trying to
placate her.  "Don't talk silly."

"Take your hand off of me."

"What?  Dana, I have every right to touch you."

"Please, take your hand off of me."

"All right.  Fine," he said, pulling his boots back on.
"I'll leave; it's obvious you don't want me here."

Dana felt the tears begin to roll down her face.  She tried
to contain her sobs, but they escaped anyway.

"Shit," Mulder said.  "Dana, I'm sorry.  Please, don't be
angry with me.  I'm doing the best I can.  She's my
friend."  Mulder covered her body with his, wrapping his
arms around her, and pulling her close to him.  "I'm
sorry," he whispered in her ear.  "I didn't mean to make
you cry."  He nuzzled the back of her neck and then rolled
her onto her back and wiped the tears from her face.
"Please don't cry."

"You're going to leave me, aren't you?"

"What?  Of course not."

"You are," Dana asserted.  "Diana wants you and you want
her."

"I don't.  I want you, not her."

"Then why do you keep leaving me?"

"What do you mean?"

"You only stay here at night half of the time."

"That's because I have to be on watch," he explained.  "You
know that."

"Not the whole night.  Sometimes, I think you don't want to
be around me."

Mulder shook his head.  "Nothing could be farther from the
truth.  I care about you."

"Promise me something then."

"What?"

"You'll stay with me at night.  Not with her."

"Dana, you have nothing to worry about."

"If you say so."

"I do say so, because it's the truth."  Mulder leaned down,
kissed her, and curled up against her back again.

~~~
 

Chapter 11

July 11, 1852
Sunday

Krycek rode up to the Mulder wagons around two that
afternoon.  He tied his horse to the back of their lead
wagon.  Dana observed Krycek talk to Jimmy as she walked
alongside their second wagon with Danny.  She saw Jimmy
nod, hand the reins to Krycek, and run off.  Krycek looked
back at her and smiled, motioning for her to come up with
him.

She joined him as he walked with their first wagon.  "What
did you say to him?" she asked.

"Just told him his sweetheart was asking for him."

"So, you're willing to drive our team?  That's generous."

Krycek cocked his head and said, "No, I thought I would
show you how to drive the team...from up there."

"You're joking."  She saw that he wasn't and shook her
head.  "No.  My husband would never approve of it."

"How do you know?  Besides, he's not here, is he?  He's
helping his friend instead."

"I don't think I should."

"Well, look at it this way.  If Diana had learned how to do
this, she wouldn't have any need for your husband to help
her, would she?"

Dana stared at him for a moment and then said, "All right,
stop them.  I'll climb up."

Krycek halted the team, helped her up, and then followed
her.  "Here, take the reins and the crop."

Dana was driving the team in no time and she smiled at
Krycek.  "This is fun," she said.

"Mama," Samantha said from behind her, "Wow."

"Thanks," she said.

"Told you that you could do it," Krycek said.

"I feel like I have so much power."

"Well, if you'll stop the team, I'll get back to my job and
let you take over."

Dana looked at him, worried.  "No, I don't think I could do
this by myself."

"You'll be fine."

Dana pulled up on the reins to stop the team and Krycek
jumped down.  He saluted her and headed off on his horse.

The children leaned against the seat behind her and watched
her drive the team.  When they stopped later, Jimmy
returned, surprised to find Dana controlling the team
instead of Krycek.

"Where did Krycek go?"

Dana jumped down from the wagon.  "He's been gone for some
time."

"How long have you been driving the team?"

"For a while," she said.

Danny came up then, saying, "You should have seen her.
She's amazing."

"Thank you," Dana said, smiling shyly at the compliment.
"But maybe we shouldn't tell William."

"Why not?" Danny asked.  "I'm sure he'd be proud of you."

"No, I don't think so.  Just don't say anything, please."

"All right Dana," Jimmy said.  "I don't understand it, but
I'll do it."

"That goes for you two also.  You're not to tell Papa.  All
right?" Dana asked Caleb and Samantha.  They both nodded
and Dana let out her breath.
 

July 17, 1852
Saturday

They had traveled all day in the Bear Valley.  There was
good grass and in the summits there were many groves of
fir, creating a beautiful view.  They halted next to a
stream with clear, cold water.  While Jimmy and Danny were
settling the team, Dana looked up to find Mulder driving
Diana's wagon up to theirs.

He stopped the team behind their wagons and helped Diana
down.  Diana walked with Mulder, her hand on his arm, to
Dana.

"Dana, I've decided to move Diana's wagon with ours."

"Really," she said, looking pointedly at Diana's hand.

Mulder looked down as though he had only just noticed Diana
touching him and removed her hand.  "She's willing to help
cook and I thought it might be easier on you if you had
extra help."

"I don't need help."

Mulder moved towards her and put his hand around her waist,
leading her away.  "Please, just do this for me."

"I thought you were going to find someone to help her."

"That's turned out to be harder than I thought it would be.
Everyone has their own to worry about."

"This is not fair."

"I'm sorry.  I know this will be hard on you.  Please, do
it for me."  He ran the back of his finger along her jaw.
"Besides, now I'll be closer to you all."

Dana put her arms around him and he did likewise.  "All
right.  Can we walk?" she asked, looking over her shoulder
to see Diana watching them.

"Sure, come on."

As they walked, she said, "Tell me about the girls."

"Eliza is seven and very quiet.  Her sister is Fanny.
She's a couple of years older and reminds me of Diana when
she was younger."

"How so?"

Mulder smiled and said, "She's a little bossy.  Have you
talked to Skinner today?"

"No.  Why?"

"He said Sharon will probably need you tonight."

Dana stopped and headed back to camp.  "I need to go to her
now."

Mulder ran after her and grabbed her.  "Wait.  Wait.  He
said tonight, not now."

"But you don't understand, I promised I would be there."

"And you will.  Just relax, there's time.  Besides, Skinner
will come and get you if she needs you sooner."

Dana looked back to the camp longingly, but nodded.  "Are
you hungry?"

"Famished."

"I'll fix dinner, but then I'm going to go to her wagon."

Mulder chuckled.  "All right.  Diana can watch the children
and we'll both go."  Dana began to object but he said,
"They'll be fine.  Besides, Danny or Jimmy will be around
until I get back."

XXXXXXXXXX

When Dana and Mulder arrived at the Skinner wagon, Walter
was pacing outside.  He looked up, surprised to see them.
"I didn't think you were coming this soon."

"Dana couldn't wait," Mulder explained.  "How's she doing?"

Skinner shook his head and said, "I've never seen her in
this much pain.  She says she's all right, but I don't
think she is."

"I'll go inside," Dana said.  She climbed in, leaving the
men behind.  Sharon's daughter Louisa was wiping her
mother's forehead with a rag.  Sharon smiled when she saw
Dana and reached a hand towards her.  She moved to her and
placed her hand in Sharon's.

"Dana, thank you for coming."

"I told you I would be here.  How long do you think it will
be?"

"Not long.  I think before the night is over.  Dana, could
you send for Mrs. Donovan?  I think I need her now."

Dana nodded.  "I heard she's the best mid-wife.  She'll see
your baby into this world."  She squeezed her hand
reassuringly.  "I'll be right back."

Dana leaned out of the wagon and called to Mulder.  He
trotted over to her and asked, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing.  She's asking for Mrs. Donovan.  Do you know
where her wagon is?"

"I think so.  She wants her to come now?"

"Yes, Sharon doesn't think it will be long."

"All right, I'll go now."  He turned and began running in
search of her.

"Dana," Walter called.

"Yes?"

"She is going to be fine, right?"

"I'm sure she will be.  She seems to be in good spirits.
Have Mrs. Donovan come in as soon as she gets here," Dana
said before disappearing back in the wagon.

XXXXXXXXXX

Shortly before midnight, Mulder and Skinner heard a baby
cry.  They had been listening to Sharon cry out and Mulder
had to restrain Skinner several times from rushing in.

"Did you hear that?" Skinner asked.

Mulder nodded.  "Congratulations."

Skinner began to climb into the wagon when Dana stopped
him.  "You can't go in yet."

"What do you mean?" Skinner asked.

"Mrs. Donovan is still cleaning her up."

"But I want to see her."

"In a moment."  Dana turned to Mulder and handed him a
bucket.  "Can you throw this out and get me some of the
water that's over the fire?"

He took it, glad to have a task.  He quickly returned and
handed it back up to her, finding that Skinner had climbed
back down.

"Walter, I promise, you'll get to see her and your daughter
soon," Dana said, taking the bucket from Mulder.

"A girl?" he asked.

"Yes and she's beautiful.  I'll be back as soon as you can
come in."  Dana backed into the wagon.

"Well, congratulations," Mulder said.  "A girl.  Does that
make you happy?"

Skinner smiled broadly.  "I don't care, as long as Sharon
and the baby are both all right."

"Come and sit down while we wait," Mulder said as he sat
near the fire.

Skinner joined him and said, "I should have waited until
the baby was born before I brought her.  We could have
waited another year."

Mulder shook his head.  "You can't second guess yourself.
Besides, Dana said they were both fine."

"You're lucky Dana won't have to worry about it on the
trail."

"No, but it's possible we won't have anyone to help us
later.  At least here, there are plenty of people who could
help."

"I hope we'll be close by."

"Me too, but you never know."  Mulder reached over and
stirred the embers of the fire.  He looked back to Skinner.
"I've made Dana promise to let me be there though, no
matter what."

"Why would you...oh, because of Penny?"

Mulder nodded.  "I can't lose her too."

"She's strong.  She'll be fine."

"She told me her first went well."

"Well there you go, that's good news."

"Walter," they heard Dana call.  They both jumped to their
feet and Skinner was at the wagon in seconds.  "You can
come in now."

He climbed up before Dana could come down.  He disappeared
and Dana asked Mulder, "Help me down?"  He reached up and
lifted her down.  "He's eager."

Mulder laughed.  "Thrilled."

"Walk me back?"

"What about Mrs. Donovan?"

"Sharon said that Victor could walk her back."

They walked quietly through the camp.  Everyone had long
settled down for the night and when they approached their
wagon, the fire had died down.  Dog came up to them and
after satisfying his curiosity, lay back down.

"I'm exhausted," Dana said as she reached up to get a grip
on the wagon to lift herself.

He placed his hands on her waist and helped her up.  "I
imagine you are."

She climbed in ahead of him and crawled onto the blankets.
She took off her shoes and next to her, Mulder did the
same.

"I'm just going to cover up and sleep."

"Good idea," he agreed, as he settled next to her.
 

July 19, 1852
Monday

It seemed as if they had entered another world.  They
passed some lava fields, containing cones and craters,
which fascinated most parties in the company.  Shortly
before noon, they arrived near Soda Springs.

They discovered that there were cold and hot springs.
Mulder was awestruck by this country.  When they rested at
noon, he joined his family at the back of their lead wagon.

"Can you believe the sights?" he asked Dana, who was
handing out the food and cold coffee to everyone.

"It's strange here.  I've never seen anything like it," she
said.

He took the food and coffee from her and said, "I thought
we'd go see some of the springs.  They say you can add
sugar to the water at Soda Springs and it tastes great.
There's also one that's supposed to taste a little like
beer."

"I don't think we should go to that one," Dana protested.

Mulder laughed and said, "Okay.  There's also one called
Steamboat Springs.  It's supposed to sound like a steamboat
whistle."

"Oh, the children would love that."

"Finish eating and we'll go soon.  We're going to move on
in several hours.  I'm going to see if Skinner wants to go
with his children."

Dana smiled and said, "We'll be ready."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder returned with the Skinner children.  "Walter isn't
coming?" Dana asked.

"No, he wanted to spend time with Sharon and the baby.  He
thanked us for giving them this opportunity."

"So are we ready to go?"

"I just want to get Diana and the children."

"Humph."

Mulder threw out his arms.  "Dana, I couldn't not ask
them."

"Fine, go get them."  She bent to pick up Caleb.  "We're
going to go on.  You catch up when you can.  Come on
Victor," she said, "please help me with the children."

He nodded and began herding the children.  "Come on, let's
go," Victor said.

"Dana," Mulder called.

"Samantha, let's go," Dana said, grabbing her hand.
"Louisa, would you carry this bag.  We have a surprise for
you."

"Okay Mrs. Mulder," she said as they walked away.

"We'll be right there," Mulder called.

XXXXXXXXXX

Victor helped them cross the small stream that seemed to
surround the hill that they would have to climb to get to
one of the springs.  There were other families who had the
same idea as they did.  The white mound looked to be about
fifteen to twenty feet high and it took them little time to
climb it.  When they reached the top, Dana looked down and
saw Mulder helping Diana and her nieces cross the same
stream.  Diana held on to Mulder's arm as they began to
climb.

Mulder waved to her but she turned away and said, "Louisa,
hand me the bag."

Samantha pulled on Dana's skirts. "Mama, what is it?"

Dana reached into the bag and pulled out some cups.  "In a
minute," she said.  "Victor and Louisa, go fill the cups
with water.  Matthew, you can help.  Just be careful of
your footing."  There were other people filling their cups
and the children went to join them.  As the children took
off, Mulder and Diana came up to them.  Dana noticed that
Diana was no longer clinging to his arm.

"This is something," he said, "don't you think?"

Diana answered before Dana could and said, "I agree."

Dana turned away without answering and said to Samantha,
who was still clinging to her, pulling on her skirts.  "In
a minute Samantha.  You'll see.  Be patient."

The children came back, carefully bringing the cups.
"Look," Victor said, "there are bubbles."

Dana smiled at him.  "Hold them still, I'm going to add
some sugar."  She poured some in each cup and stirred it.
"Hand me one of the cups.  Let it cool for a bit, then make
sure all of the children, including Eliza and Fanny get
some."  Victor nodded and the children gathered around him.
 
After their cup had cooled, Dana bent down and said, "All
right Samantha, here you go, take a sip."  Dana helped her
hold the cup and when she took a sip, Samantha squealed.
Dana laughed.

"Papa, try it," Samantha said.

Mulder moved over to her.  "Maybe in a little bit.  Do you
like it?"

Samantha nodded her head.  "Can I have some more?"

"Let Caleb have some first.  Caleb," Mulder said.  "Come
here.  Dana, hand me the cup."

When Caleb took a sip, he giggled and stomped his feet.
Mulder laughed and looked up to find Dana laughing too.

"Here Mama," Mulder said to Dana, "Your turn."

Dana shook her head and said, "You first."

Victor ran up as Mulder was drinking and asked, "Can we get
more?"

"Sure," Dana said and the children took off again.

"Papa, more," Caleb said.

"Mama's turn first.  It's good Dana.  Try it," Mulder said.

Dana took the cup from him and agreed, "Yes, it is good."

"Diana," he said.  "Do you want to try some?"  She shook
her head.  "I'll go get some more water then."

The children ran back to Dana and she again put sugar in
the water.  "This is the last time.  Enjoy it."

"You're so lucky, do you know that?" Diana asked when the
children had moved away.

"What?"

"If I had known that he would have married again, I would
have come back home.  I thought he would never marry again
after Penny."  They both looked over at him as he knelt
down to get more water.  "If I had been there, you never
would have stood a chance."

Narrowing her eyes, Dana said, "And you don't stand one
now."

Turning away from her, Dana was stopped when Diana said,
"Maybe."

Dana turned back and was about to say more when Mulder
walked up to them.  "Here you go," he said smiling at her.
"Put some more sugar in."  She reached into her bag and
sprinkled some in.

"I don't want any more," she said as Diana moved over to
her nieces.  "You share it with the children."

"You sure?  It's good."

"No thanks," she said, looking over at Diana.  "Are we
going to see the other spring too, the steamboat one?"

He gave the cup to Samantha.  "Share with Caleb, Samantha."
She nodded and he watched them to make sure she did just
that.  "It's not supposed to be far from here.  Finish up,"
he called to the children.  "We're about ready to go."

When the children were finished, they came back to Dana to
give her the cups.  "Did you enjoy that?" She asked them.

"Yes," they yelled.

"Okay, we're ready to move on," she said.

Mulder bent down and lifted Caleb to his shoulders.
"Papa," Samantha said.  "I want up too."

"Let's see if Victor will carry you.  Would that be all
right?"

She nodded and he called Victor over to them.  "Victor,
could you carry Samantha?"

"Sure," he said, bending down to tickle her, causing
Samantha to squeal with delight.

"Fox," Diana said.  "I can carry her."

"No," Samantha said, "I want Victor."

"Sorry Mrs. Tipton.  Matthew," Victor called, "lift
Samantha onto my back."  When she was settled, they took
off down the hill.  Dana moved to follow, but Mulder held
her back, instead, letting all of the children and Diana
move ahead of them.

When they didn't follow, Diana turned and asked, "Are you
coming?"

Mulder nodded.  "We'll be there in a minute."  When she
turned away, he said to Dana, "Are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad."

"Could have fooled me," he said.

"Move Papa," Caleb commanded.

"Soon, Caleb," he said, swinging Caleb's feet, attempting
to distract him.

"I'm not mad," she said, smiling and reaching up to pat
Caleb's leg.  She looked back at Mulder.  "It just seems
that when we're not traveling, she's always there.  We
don't have any time alone."

"I can't be rude to her."

"I'm not asking you to, but we need time for our family."

"Come on, let's head on down," he said, putting his hand on
her shoulder.

When they reached the bottom, the rest were waiting on the
other side of the stream.  "Here, hold on to my hand," he
said as they crossed.  When they reached the other side, he
said, "Let's go."

The children rushed ahead of the adults, but Diana chose to
stay with Mulder and Dana, much to Dana's dismay.  Dana
walked on Mulder's right side and Diana moved to walk on
his left.

Diana reached up and rubbed Caleb's leg.

"Don't," Caleb said, pushing her hand away and frowning.

"Caleb, you're so tall," Diana said, trying to win him
over.

Caleb shook his head.  "Papa's tall."

"Well I guess you're right," she said, smiling at Mulder.
"He is tall."

"Humph," Mulder said.

"Caleb, do you remember your real Papa?"

"Papa," Caleb said, patting Mulder's head.

Dana moved towards her, but Mulder stopped her.  He said,
"Diana, don't confuse him."

"I was just wondering if he could remember his real
father."

"What does that matter?" Mulder asked.

"Dana, you mean you don't care if he remembers his real
father or not?"

"I don't see that it's any business of yours," Dana said,
holding her arms up towards her son.  "William, hand me
Caleb please."

"No, he's fine.  You're okay up there, aren't you buddy?"

"Yeah," Caleb agreed.

Dana lowered her arms and said, "Fine."

They walked on in silence and Mulder put his hand on Dana's
waist.  They observed that the springs were of varying
color, some white, some red and some even black.

"We're here."  Mulder lifted Caleb off of his shoulders,
brought him down, and settled him on his hip.  "Listen
Caleb."

Mulder moved toward the children and Caleb said, "What's
that?"

"Hear that sound?" Mulder asked.  He pointed to the
bubbling water where the sound was coming from.  "That's
what a steamboat whistle sounds like."

"What's that?" he asked.

"Remember when we rode the big boat on that big river?"
Caleb nodded.  "It sounds like those boats, remember?"
Caleb shook his head and Mulder laughed.  "That's okay.
Just listen."  After a moment, Mulder said, "You want to go
with the other kids?"  Caleb nodded and Mulder set him
down.  "Matthew," he called, "Watch Caleb."  When Mulder
was satisfied that he was in good hands, he turned back to
the women.

Dana looked at him angrily and then began to walk by him
towards her children, but Mulder grabbed her arm.  "Let me
go," she said.

"Wait."

"No," Dana said.  "That was cruel.  I don't care if she is
your friend."

Diana stepped closer and said, "Dana, I'm sorry.  I didn't
mean anything.  I'm sorry if I upset you or Caleb."

"I've told you I think of him as my son," Mulder said,
still holding on to Dana, holding her eyes with a steady
look.

"I just wondered if my nieces could ever begin thinking of
me as their mother, since it seems I'm going to raise
them," Diana explained.

"He's just a little boy," Dana said to Diana.  "He couldn't
possibly understand that reasoning, not that I believe it."
She looked back at Mulder and said, "Please let go of me."

Mulder released her and she moved to the children.  "I'm
sorry Fox," Diana said.

"You shouldn't have said anything Diana."

"Thinking back, I see you're right."

"You can't make friends with her like that."

"I don't think there is even a possibility we will be
friends."

"Maybe," Mulder said.  "I just wished..."

Diana grabbed his hand, squeezing it.  "I know."

Mulder pulled his hand away and said, "I need to go to the
children."

"Fox, I rely on you.  This won't affect our friendship will
it?"

He hesitated, but then said, "No, I'll still be there for
you."

Diana watched Mulder join his family and moved to follow,
looking for her nieces.

~~~

Chapter 12

July 22, 1849
Sunday

"Where are you going?" Mulder asked, stretching and
scratching his side as he came around the side of the wagon
early that morning.

Dana bent down to straighten Samantha's dress.  "The
Reverend is holding a service this morning down by the
river.  He thinks it's shameful that we haven't had a
service for a couple of weeks.  Caleb, stand still," she
said as she made sure he was presentable.  "And I agree
with him.

"So, you were just going to sneak away and not tell me?"

"You were sleeping."

"You weren't expecting me to come?"

Dana looked up hopefully.  "You'll come?"

Mulder shook his head.  "Nope."

Dana shook her head.  "All right then, if you're sure, I'm
going to go on."  She bent down, lifted Caleb into her
arms, and then reached down for Samantha's hand.

"Who else is going?" Mulder asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Did you ask Diana to go?" he asked as he pulled his
suspenders over his shoulders.

"Everyone is invited to attend."

"Yes, but is she going?"

"I have no idea."

"Well, I think it would be nice if you go together."

Dana shook her head, "I don't think so."

Mulder tisked and said, "That's not being a good
Christian."

"You're one to talk.  You take her if you're so interested
in seeing her go."

"Dana, I just meant that it would be..."

"I have to go," she said, turning and stalking off.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dana stood next to Walter Skinner and his family.  Sharon
was resting in their wagon, still recovering from the birth
of their child.  Walter had confided that they were worried
because the baby seemed so weak.

The service had already started when Dana noticed movement
to her side.  She was surprised to see Mulder, Diana, and
her nieces join the service.  She observed that others had
noticed Mulder with Diana and they gave Dana curious looks.
She felt her face flame with embarrassment.

Near the close of the service, Dana noted that while others
were singing, Mulder was not.  He seemed to be very
uncomfortable and when he looked up and caught her eye, she
looked back down, smoothing Samantha's hair as she sang.
Samantha looked up at her and Dana smiled.  Samantha smiled
back and leaned against the front of Dana's legs.

When the service was over, Dana turned to Skinner, laying
her hand on his arm.  "Walter, I thought I could come to
your camp and cook for your family and mine today.  Since
we have antelope meat from what the men killed yesterday, I
thought we could have a good meal."

Skinner patted her hand and said, "Thank you.  We'd
appreciate that."

"I'll be over before noon."

Dana looked over at Mulder, who was following Diana to the
Reverend.  Mulder bent down to say something to Diana, who
looked in her direction.  She nodded and Mulder moved
towards Dana.

She quickly picked Caleb up and grabbed Samantha's hand.
"Come on Samantha."  She pulled the little girl away from
the people.  "Excuse me," Dana said, trying desperately to
go in the opposite direction of Mulder.

"Dana," she heard him calling behind her, but she continued
moving forward, ignoring him.  "Dana stop."

She ran into Mr. Zimmerman, an elderly gentleman who still
had a slight German accent.  "I'm sorry," she said after
almost knocking him down.

Mr. Zimmerman righted himself.  "That's all right.  In a
hurry are you?" he asked, looking in Mulder's direction.

"Yes," she said, "I'm sorry sir, but I need to go."

Dana took off again, but Samantha pulled on her, saying
"Papa."  Dana let go of her hand and looked back, seeing
her run to Mulder.  Knowing that she was safe, she hurried
her pace again.

It wasn't long before Mulder caught up with her, Samantha
in his arms.  He put his hand on her shoulder.  She
shrugged it off and stopped to face him.  "Don't touch me,"
she said.  She raised her hand to stop him moving closer.
"Just...don't.  I can't talk to you right now.  It's Sunday
and I don't like the thoughts that are running through my
head."

"She talked me into going."

"That's great.  She talked you into going.  Yet when I
asked you, you refused to go.  Do you have any idea how
embarrassing that was for me?"

"Why would it be?"

"Didn't you notice how people were looking at us?"

"Honestly no.  Why would they be?"

"Because, they asked me if you were coming and I told them
no, my husband wouldn't come.  Yet, you show up minutes
later, at the side of an old flame.  Or maybe she isn't so
old."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"You know what?  I don't want to talk to you anymore.  I
have to prepare a meal at the Skinner's camp.  I told
Walter I would help out."

"All right, I'll watch the children until it's time to
eat."

She handed Caleb to him and said, "You do that.  And if you
decide not to come, please make sure the children at least
get to the camp."

"I'll be there," he said and Dana turned away.

XXXXXXXXXX

Victor was sent to get Mulder, the children, and the boys
when Dana had the meal prepared.  She was helping Walter
get Sharon out of the wagon and onto a chair when Mulder
showed up with the children.  She looked behind him and saw
Diana and her nieces following, with Jimmy and Danny
bringing up the rear.

"Damn it," Dana said.

"Dana, it's the Sabbath," Sharon said.

She looked up, ashamed.  "I'm sorry."  Sighing, she said,
"I knew he couldn't leave that woman behind."

"Dana, what has happened?"

"Nothing.  Don't worry about it."  Dana bent over to tuck
the blanket around Sharon.  "You need to focus on your
health.  I hope you like what I fixed," she said, rising.

Sharon stopped her from moving away; watching Mulder help
Diana spread the blanket before helping her sit down.
Skinner was lifting Caleb up in the air, causing him to
bubble with laughter.  Samantha was saying, "My turn Uncle
Walter, my turn."

"Something has happened," Sharon said.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Walter said that Fox had moved her wagon with yours."
Dana looked down and nodded.  "Fox," Sharon said, looking
over Dana's shoulder, who startled.  She didn't realize
that he had come up behind her.

"Sharon, how are you feeling?"  Mulder asked.  Dana began
to move away when she felt his hand at her waist.

"I'm doing better, thank you."

Mulder felt Dana begin to move again and tightened his grip
on her waist, stilling her.  "How is the baby?  Have you
decided on a name?"

"No, not yet.  Walter wants to name her after his
grandmother Priscilla."

"That's a nice name."

"I suppose," she said.  "What do you think of it Dana?"

"I like it.  Excuse me," she said, pulling out of his arms,
"I have to finish supper."

Dana moved to the fire, removing the meat.  "Dana," she
heard from behind her.  She straightened up and swung
around, feeling her temper rise.  "Could I help?" Diana
asked sweetly, although Dana knew she wasn't sincere.

"No thank you, I can manage."

"Don't be silly," she said, making a move towards the food.
"Let me help."

Dana stepped in between Diana and the fire.  "I don't need
your help."

Diana looked over to Mulder and shrugged, moving away.
When she was lifting the bread off, she heard Mulder say
from behind, "Why did you have to do that?  She just wanted
to help."

"I don't need her help, nor do I want it."

He put his hand on her arm and said, "Dana, you're being
silly."

She wretched her arm away from him and hissed, "I am not
being silly and I don't need either one of you to say I
am."

"This is getting ridiculous.  You're acting like a child."

"Do you think you can insult me any more?" she said as
tears began to form in her eyes.  She turned to Skinner and
said, "I'm sorry Walter."  Skinner looked up at Mulder,
accusingly when he saw the tears begin to fall from her
face.  "I'm not hungry anymore.  Could you make sure
everyone is fed?"

Skinner nodded and Dana took off, away from the camp,
letting the tears fall freely.  When Mulder made a move to
follow her, Skinner stepped in front of him, halting his
steps.  "Get out of my way," Mulder said.

"No, I think you've done enough damage."

"Get out of my way."

"I'm not letting you go upset her further."

"She's my wife."

"Yes, but she's also my friend and I feel responsible for
her."  Skinner leaned in and said, "Give her a break.  She
needs some time."

Mulder looked at Dana's retreating back and sighed.  "Watch
my children, I need to take a walk," he said, heading in
the opposite direction of Dana.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dana retreated to the river and sat along the shore.  She
threw rocks in, enjoying hearing the plunking sound.  She
didn't understand why Mulder kept hurting her.  She
couldn't think of anything she had done to deserve it.

"Penny for your thoughts," she heard a familiar voice say.

Dana smiled and looked up, squinting from the sun in her
eyes.  "Alex," she said, wiping the tears from her face.

He immediately looked concerned.  "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"It doesn't look like nothing."  He sat down beside her.
"You can talk to me, I'm a good listener."

Dana shook her head.  "I know you mean well, but I don't
think I should.  It's private."

"Let me guess.  This has something to do with your husband
and Diana Tipton."

"How did you know?" she asked.

Alex looked away, throwing a rock in the river.  "There has
been some talk in the company."

"What are people saying?"

He shook his head.  "You don't want to know."  Alex looked
into her eyes.  "For what it's worth, I think your husband
is a fool Dana."

"He doesn't see that he's doing anything wrong."  She
pulled her legs up and rested her chin on her knees.  "He
says he's being her friend."

"Do you think they're..."

"No," she said quickly.  "I don't, really I don't."

Alex nodded, "Okay."

"But..."

"But?"

"I think she wishes that she was his wife.  He was her beau
when they were young."

"Hmm."  Krycek threw another rock and then looked back
towards her.  "Can I ask a personal question?"

"I don't know."

"Do you love him?"

Before answering, Dana paused.  "You know, we married very
quickly.  I mean, really, it was more like an arranged
marriage."

"So, not a love match?"  Dana shook her head.  "I'm not so
sure that's unusual these days."

"I think I feel more for him than he feels for me."

"I don't know.  He seems to be jealous when he sees me
around you."

"I'm not sure that's jealousy.  I think it's more that he's
possessive."  Dana stood and said, "Thank you for talking
with me.  I feel a little better, but I think I need some
time to myself.  Do you mind?"

Krycek shook his head and stood as well.  "Anytime you need
to talk, just let me know."  She turned from him and he
grabbed her hand.  "Really, I mean it.  I want to be a
friend to you."  She nodded and he released her hand.  He
watched her walk along the river before turning away.

XXXXXXXXXX

When Dana returned to their wagon, it was late.  She had
stayed out, watching the sun set and finally watching the
stars shine brightly in the sky until the moon rose in the
sky.  The company had settled down some time ago.  She was
thankful that Mulder hadn't pursued her, but she was uneasy
about having to talk with him again.

Dana never knew it, but Mulder sent Danny to look for and
follow her until she returned.  From the shadows, Danny saw
her return safely to their camp and then turned back to go
on watch.

Bending down, Dana called Dog to her.  He crawled out from
under the wagon, wagging his tail.  She petted him for a
moment, then said, "Good boy."  She began to climb into the
wagon and Dog took his position of guard under the wagon
again.

The moonlight provided enough for her to see the children
sleeping soundly.  Mulder slept on his side, turned away
from her.  She quietly crawled to her space and pulled her
gown out.  She stripped quickly and donned it.  Slipping
under the covers, she held her breath.  When Mulder didn't
make a move to talk to her, she let out a sigh.

She had almost fallen asleep when she heard him turn over.
"Are you ready to talk yet?" he asked as he leaned on an
elbow, towering over her.  His face was in shadow,
preventing her from seeing him.  "I let you have some time
like you wanted.  I hope you appreciate how hard that was
for me."  She began to sob and he said, "Oh Dana, why do I
seem to make you cry lately?"  He ran his hand gently over
her face, wiping the tears away.  "What can I do to fix
this?"

"You know."

"What?  Tell me."

Instead of answering him, she pulled him down for a kiss.
He responded in kind and was relieved when he felt her
passion increase.  "Just don't leave me," she said.

"What?  Why would I do that?"

Again, she didn't answer him but instead, pushed him on his
back.  She crawled onto him, not seeming to be able to get
enough contact with him.  She pulled his shirt open and
kissed him on his neck.  He threw his head back so that she
could have more contact and threaded his hand in her hair.
She ran her hands over his chest and kissed him as she
moved down.  She pulled his britches apart and down,
freeing him.  Lifting her gown up over her hips, she braced
her legs on either side of him and felt him ready for her.
She eased onto him and released her breath when she was
settled over him.

He reached up and pulled her down for a long kiss.  When he
released her, he tried to pull her gown over her head, but
she stopped him, shaking her head, saying, "The children."
Instead, he gripped her waist and she began to move in a
steady pace.  He felt his breath quicken and ran his hands
under her gown, cupping her breasts.  He squeezed them
briefly, then ran his hands over her nipples, feeling them
rise.

It excited him to make love to Dana.  Penny had never let
him touch her as Dana did and they had never made love
except with him above her.  It was exciting doing new
things with her.

She quickened their pace, but stilled.  She whispered, "I
love you," before she bent down and kissed him again.  She
began the pace she set again and she soon felt him peak.
She lay down on top of him until she felt him get his
breath, not caring to feel the same as he did this time.
She moved beside him and threw her leg over his.  He
reached down and ran his hand along her leg.  He kissed her
temple and pulled her closer.  They soon fell into a deep
sleep.
 

July 29, 1852
Thursday

Dana woke in the morning, thankful that Mulder had already
left.  She rose, feeling her stomach turn and rushed
outside the wagon, losing the little contents that were in
her stomach.  This was becoming a daily occurrence,
although she had thrown up at other times of the day.  So
far, she had been able to hide it from Mulder, but she
feared he might soon find out that she was expecting a
baby.

She didn't want him to know yet due to the uncertainty of
the trail and of their marriage.  Lately, they had only
briefly spoken to each other since Mulder had to be
concerned with making sure that Diana's wagon was prepared
to leave each day.  He left his own wagons to be tended by
his cousins.

Dana was disappointed that Mulder hadn't been able to find
someone to drive Diana's team at Fort Hall.  But then
again, the fort had been a disappointment since it had been
abandoned by the government and was now run by some
traders.  They quickly left it soon after arriving.  Before
long, they saw the Snake River for the first time.

Climbing back into the wagon, she woke the children and
dressed them and herself.  She didn't feel like eating and
Jimmy gave her a curious look when she again turned her
nose up at his offering.

"Dana, you need to eat."

"No, I'm okay.  Maybe I'll eat something later."

Jimmy turned from her, shaking his head.  She pulled Caleb
into her lap as he ate and Samantha ate quietly at her
side.  Dog came up to her and tried to get closer to the
food, but she pushed him away.  "Go lie down Dog."

Mulder came up behind her and dropped down.  "Have you
eaten?"

"Yes," she said.  Jimmy looked sharply at her, but remained
silent.

"Jimmy," he said, running his hand over Caleb's head,
"please bring me some coffee and food."

Jimmy handed it to him and then said, "I have to yoke up
the oxen.  I'm going to get Danny now.  Do you need me for
anything else?"

Mulder shook his head, chewing the bread.  "Go ahead.  I
already have Diana's wagon ready to go."

"When do you think we'll reach the next fort?" Dana asked.

"Less than a month, I expect."

"I've written my sister a letter, could you send it when we
get there?"

Mulder smiled and said, "Of course.  Do you want to send
one to your brother as well?"

Dana shook her head.  "I don't know if it will do any good.
Besides, I said everything I wanted to say in the other
letter."

Mulder put his hand out to her and she laid hers in his.
He squeezed it and said, "I still think that over time,
he'll realize you did the best thing for you.  At least I
hope it was?"

Squeezing his hand back, she said, "It was the right
decision...for me and for Caleb."

"Good."  He released her hand and went back to eating.
They were enjoying the quiet when Skinner came into camp.

"Dana, the children wanted me to come and ask if Samantha
and Caleb could ride with us this morning."

Samantha turned to her parents and said, "Please, I want to
go."  Caleb echoed her.

"I don't know," she said.

"Let them go.  Caleb and Samantha love being with them."
Mulder turned back to Skinner.  "You're keeping them in the
wagon right?"

"Yes.  We thought they might like the change."

"Come on Dana, they'll be fine," Mulder said.

"You promise they'll stay in the wagon?" Dana asked.
Skinner nodded.  "All right."

"Can we go with Uncle Walter now?" Samantha asked.

"Are you finished?" Dana asked.  Both of the children
nodded.  "Okay, you can take them with you Walter.  You
mind them while you're riding," she told the children.

"We will," Samantha answered for both her and Caleb.

Skinner bent down and picked up Caleb and Samantha.  He
carried them like sacks of flour, causing them to giggle at
being held so awkwardly.
 
"They just ate," Dana said.  "Don't let them get sick."

"They'll be fine Dana," Skinner said over his shoulder and
disappeared with them around a wagon.

"The girls will make sure they stay in the wagon," Mulder
assured her as he moved next to her.  He turned to face
her.

"I hope you're right."

"Since the children are going to be with the Skinners, what
do you say we take a ride away from everyone?"

"Why?"

"Remember?  When we were on my horse together?"  Mulder
looked around to make sure no one was looking before he ran
his hand up her leg, under her dress.

"Huh uh."  Dana grabbed his hand through her dress to stop
him.

"Oh come on.  This would be the perfect time."

"No.  Besides, you have to drive Diana's team, remember?"

Mulder pulled his hand back and said, "Damn."  He looked
back to Diana's wagon, frowning.  It gave Dana a little
thrill that he was upset about having to drive Diana today.
He sighed and said, "Maybe we can hire some man at Fort
Boise to drive the team."

Dana smiled behind him.  "Do you think that's possible?
You didn't have any luck at Fort Hall."

"Maybe.  At least there shouldn't be men heading for
California.  They should have already turned off by then."
He turned back to her.  "That would make you happy if I
found someone, wouldn't it?"

"That you wouldn't be spending so much time with her?  Of
course."

Mulder grinned, "You have nothing to be jealous about."

Dana stood up, hands on her hips.  "I am not jealous."

Mulder grinned even bigger.  "Liar."

She turned from him and said, "I still have a few things to
get packed."

"All right," he said, standing.  "I'll drop it.  I'm going
to help the boys finish up.  Kiss?"

"Kiss what?" she asked coyly as she turned back to him.

"Me," he said, bending down.  He took hold of her face and
brought her lips closer to his.  "Kiss?" he asked again.
She smiled and leaned up to him, closing the distance.
When they broke free, he left her to finish her tasks.

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder led them with Diana's wagon and Jimmy followed next
with Danny right behind him.  Dana, walking with Danny, was
able to observe Mulder as he walked the team.  Diana walked
closely to Mulder, leaning in to say something every now
and then.  At around ten that morning, Dana was interrupted
in her thoughts.

"Mrs. Mulder," Jacob Walker called, running towards her.
"Mrs. Mulder."  Dana turned around, walking back towards
him.  He halted when he reached her and said, "My mother
sent me to tell you.  There was word that a child fell out
of the Skinner wagon and was run over by it.  My mother
thought she saw Mr. Skinner putting your children--"

She grabbed him to stop him from continuing and said, "Go
tell my husband."  She then took off running in the
direction Jacob had come from.  She passed wagons, checking
each to see if it was Skinner's.  She finally began
noticing wagons had stopped and people were milling behind
one.  "Let me through," she said, pushing.  "Please."

When she broke through, she saw Sharon on the ground
clutching Francis, her youngest boy, to her.  She was
wailing and rocking him.  Blood ran down his face and his
neck was at an odd angle.  Victor stood behind them crying.
She saw Louisa, standing with Matthew.  Dana went up to
her.  "Louisa, where are Samantha and Caleb?"  Louisa stood
there, unable to answer.  "Louisa," she said, grabbing and
shaking her.  "Where are my children?"

"With Margaret in the wagon," she said at last.

Dana pushed back through the crowd, trying to reach the
Skinner wagon.  When she finally broke free, she saw
Margaret, Samantha, and Caleb looking out the back.  She
felt Mulder come up behind her.  "Oh, thank God," he said.
"Who is hurt?"  He pulled Caleb out and handed him to her.
"Come here Samantha."

"Francis," she said, kissing Caleb and then Samantha, who
was now in Mulder's arms.  "It isn't good."

"Is he alive?" he asked, rocking Samantha.

Dana shook her head.  "I don't think so.  Has someone gone
to get Skinner?"

Thomas Watkins answered.  "I sent my boy to get him.  He's
up front, but he should be getting here..."

"Oh God," they heard Skinner cry.

Dana handed Caleb to Mulder.  "I'm going to them.  Take the
children to the boys and then come back.  I think we should
both be here for them."

"All right," he said.

Dana pushed back through the gathering of people.  Some of
the men began dispersing the crowd, making it easier to
reach the Skinner family.

Skinner was on the ground now with Sharon, holding her as
she held their lifeless son.  "Walter," Dana said.

He looked up, his eyes filled.  "Dana.  My boy."

Nodding, she bent down.  "Is he breathing?"  Skinner shook
his head.  "I think we should get him to your wagon then.
You can send the children to ours."

"I'm sorry," Victor said.

Skinner looked up at his eldest son.  "It wasn't your
fault.  It was an accident."

"No.  I was in charge.  You said so.  It was my
responsibility to make sure everyone was safe."

Skinner stood up, going to his son.  "Listen to me son.
It's not your fault."  He pulled Victor to him as he began
to cry.  He looked over and saw Margaret, Matthew and
Louisa, crying.  He opened his arms and the other children
ran to him, Skinner engulfing them all.

"Sharon," Dana said.  "Let's take Francis to your wagon,
all right?"  Sharon shook her head and clutched him
tighter.  With the noise dying down, they were able to hear
a child begin to cry.  "Sharon, we have to get Francis to
your wagon and you need to take care of Priscilla.  Do you
hear her crying?"

"What?" she asked, confused.

"Priscilla needs you too.  Walter will take care of
Francis.  You go to Priscilla."

"I can't leave my boy, Dana."

"I know, but Priscilla needs you now."

Sharon looked down and kissed Francis on his forehead.
"All right.  You promise you'll make sure Walter brings him
to me?"

"I promise."

Sharon nodded and laid Francis down gently.  As she headed
for the wagon, Mulder returned.  He bent down by Dana.  "Is
he dead?"

Dana nodded.  "I think we need to take their children back
to our wagon."

"You go.  I'll help Walter.  He's going to need it."

"All right, I'll take them back."  Dana walked over to
Skinner and his children.

"Walter," Dana said.  Skinner looked up.  "William will
help you.  I sent Sharon back to your wagon to take care of
Priscilla.  I think the children should come back with me
to our wagon.  Would that be all right?"

"I'm staying," Victor said.

Skinner stared at him for a moment and then said, "You can
stay.  Children, go back with Dana.  I'll come for you in a
little while."  They began to protest, but he said,
"Please, just go.  I'll come for you, I promise."

Dana reached up and gripped his hand.  "Walter, I'm sorry."

Skinner nodded.  "Just take care of my children."

"I will.  Come on, let's go," Dana said, gathering the
Skinner children and heading them in the direction of her
wagon.  Before leaving, Dana looked back to see Skinner and
Mulder slowly approaching Francis's body.
 

~~~
 

Chapter 13

July 30, 1852
Friday

They had buried Francis at the head of wagons in the
afternoon on Thursday.  In the morning, the wagons slowly
rolled over the grave and compacted the ground, hopefully
preventing animals from destroying the grave.

Sharon was still distraught, but Priscilla required her
attention and Sharon's maternal instinct forced her to turn
to her youngest child for comfort.  The Skinner children
were now back with their parents and Skinner stayed close
to his wagons.

The company stopped for the night at a cold, clear river.
Dana decided to walk down to it before she had to cook.
Mulder hadn't returned, so she left the children with Jimmy
and Catherine Tanner, who Jimmy had invited for supper.

When she reached the river, she realized why Mulder hadn't
returned.  He was with several other men who were fishing
in the river.  It seemed that they were doing well, but
Dana didn't want to be noticed, so she walked further down
the river.  The water ran swiftly over the boulders,
causing a loud roar.  She soon lost track of time, enjoying
the scenery.  As she walked back, she found that the men
had already left and she quickly walked back to camp.  When
she arrived, she found Jimmy cooking over the fire and
Catherine playing with Caleb and Samantha.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was so late," Dana said.
Jimmy looked up and smiled.  "Did William bring any fish to
you?"

"Yes," Jimmy said, "but he said he was going to eat with
Diana.  I'm sorry Dana."

She shook her head and inhaled deeply.  "The food smells
great."

Catherine walked up to them, Samantha and Caleb in tow.  "I
love your children, Mrs. Mulder."

"Thank you.  I think we should go ahead and eat, what do
you say?"

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder was sitting alone with Diana, her nieces already in
bed, when he heard from behind, "Dana says that if you
don't come back now, then she would like you to stay with
us tonight."

Mulder whipped around to find Danny standing behind him.

"I'll come in a little bit."

"She said to tell you that she doesn't want you waking the
children, so if you don't come now, you have to stay with
us."

"Go back and tell her that I will come back when I'm
finished here."

Danny leaned in and whispered to him, "I don't think you
really want me to tell her that.  She's angry right now."

Mulder exhaled and said, "All right, I'll come."  Danny
hurried back in the direction he had come.  "Diana, I think
I better go now."

"Thanks for being with me tonight.  I appreciate the
company."  Mulder moved to go, but Diana grabbed his hand,
stopping him.  "I really mean that Fox.  If it wasn't for
you, I think I would go crazy."  She began to cry.  "I
don't want to be like my sister."

"You won't.  You're strong."  Mulder lifted his hands to
cup her face, forcing her to look at him.  "But, if you
ever feel that way, even a little, I want you to come to
me.  I am still your friend.  I will always be there for
you."

"Thank you Fox."

"I better go," he said.  Diana nodded and he waited until
she had climbed into her tent before turning to go.

XXXXXXXXXX

When Mulder returned to his wagon, Danny and Jimmy had
already retired to their tent.  He was about to climb into
the wagon when he heard someone being sick on the other
side of the wagon.  When he looked, he saw Dana on her
knees, throwing up into a bucket.  He came up and bent down
next to her, putting his hand on her back.  "You're sick?"

Dana looked up momentarily.  "What do you think?" she asked
before she leaned into the bucket again.

She had already retired for bed and had taken her hair
down, so Mulder pulled it back to keep it out of her way.
"When did you start feeling sick?" he asked.  She shook her
head, not answering him.  When she leaned back, he asked,
"Finished?"  She nodded and he took the bucket from her,
heading off to rinse it out.

When he returned, she had disappeared.  He looked in the
wagon and found her lying down.  He climbed in, being
careful not to disturb the children.  Before coming in, he
had soaked a rag and now brought it to her forehead.  She
pushed his hand away, "I don't need it."

He placed the rag back on her forehead, "This will make you
feel better.  When did you start feeling sick?"  When she
didn't say anything, he said, "Answer me.  When did you
begin to feel sick?"

"I feel better, really."

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yes, I just want to go to sleep."

"Danny said you were mad."

She glanced over at him before looking away.  "He did?"

"Yes.  Is it because I couldn't find anyone for Diana's
wagon or because I was eating with her?  I'm sorry if it
was because of that, but I didn't feel like I could refuse
her.  She was really lonely tonight and needed someone to
talk to."

"I'm all right now."

Mulder looked at her, doubt clearly written on his face.
"You sure?"

She shrugged.  "Did you look for someone again?"

"I did, but I couldn't find anyone suitable.  I need to
find someone who I can trust."

"Can't you teach her how to drive her own team?"

"She's a woman."

"So? I know..." she stopped herself.  "You wouldn't teach
me?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because my wife is not going to do a man's job.  Now let's
go to sleep."

"But..."

"Sleep."  Dana turned on her side, facing away from Mulder.
She had almost told him that she could drive the team.  She
wondered what he would say if she volunteered to drive
Diana's team.  Of course, that was the last thing she
wanted or would do.
 

August 5, 1852
Thursday

The company was laying over for the day and Mulder was gone
with a hunting party.  They weren't expected to return
until late in the day or early the next day, so Dana
decided to take advantage of the situation and find Krycek.
She didn't think Mulder would have gone if Krycek was in
the party.

Earlier, she dropped off the children with the Skinners.
When they asked where she was going, she lied and said that
she just wanted a little time alone.

She found Krycek sitting on a hill, looking down at the
camp.  "Mr. Krycek, I've been looking for you."

"You've found me," he said, looking up at her.  "What can I
do for you Dana?  And remember, it's Alex."

She nodded and sat down beside him.  "I was wondering if
you could teach me to ride a horse."

"Really?" he asked.  "I thought you didn't like them."

"I don't, but I think I should learn how to ride anyway."

"And you want me to teach you?  Why not your husband?"

"I want to surprise him.  I would have asked Walter, but I
didn't want him to have to be away from Sharon."

He stood and brushed off his pants.  "All right, when do
you want to do it?"

"Now."

"Now?" he asked, surprised.

Dana nodded.  "My husband is away on the hunting party and
we might not get another chance."

"I'll have to get another horse.  Can you wait here?"

"Yes."

"All right, but I don't think we should ride where there
are other people.  It might start some talk."

"Where should we meet?"

"How about down by the creek?  We'll find someplace then."

"All right, I'll see you there," she said.  She watched him
as he trotted down the hill and wondered if she was really
doing the right thing.

XXXXXXXXXX

Krycek approached her, riding one horse and holding the
reins of another.  Dana could feel her heart rate increase
as he got closer.  Maybe she was being too hasty, she
thought.  Maybe she really didn't need to learn how to ride
a horse.

"You ready?" Krycek asked, jumping down and tying both
horses to the branches of a bush.

"I suppose."

"Well then, come over here.  I'll lift you up," he said,
bending down and cupping his hands.  She put her foot in
them and he lifted her.  When she settled with both legs
over one side, he said, "You can't ride like that.  You'll
have to swing your other leg over or you'll fall off."

Dana looked at him horrified.  "I can't do that.  It isn't
decent."

"Well, which do you think is worse, falling off or letting
a little of your leg show?"

"Turn around," she ordered him.  Krycek laughed, but did as
she said.  When she had her leg over, she tried to pull her
dress down over her legs as much as possible, but her dress
still rode up a little.  "Okay, I'm ready."

Krycek looked back up at her.  "This is Bessie.  She's a
gentle horse, so all you pretty much have to do is hold on
and she'll take care of the rest.  Here, take the reins."

She gripped the reins and held onto the saddle as Krycek
climbed onto his horse.  "Which way?" he asked.

Dana looked both ways.  "How about further down the creek,
away from everyone?"

"Okay, I'll lead.  Just hold on."

After they had been riding for a few minutes, Dana felt
herself become more confident.  "How am I doing?"

"You're doing fine," he said, riding next to her just in
case she would need his help.  "Okay, now for some lessons.
When you want to stop, just pull back on the reins, but not
too hard.  She'll know what you want.  Want to try it?"

Dana shook her head.  "I'm doing just fine."

"You'll have to stop sometime.  Come on, try it."

Dana shrugged her shoulders and pulled back on the reins,
making Bessie stop.  The horse shuffled her feet a little,
causing Dana to get nervous.

"That was good.  She's just ready to go again.  Now, how
you turn her is to pull on the right rein if you want her
to go right and on the left rein if you want her to go
left.  Think you have that?"  Dana nodded.  "Okay.  Let's
head toward that meadow.  You lead."

"Easy for you to say," she said, but did as he asked.  Dana
found Bessie easily obeying her as they worked their way to
the meadow.

"We'll just walk up and down here for a bit, until you feel
comfortable."

After about twenty minutes of riding, they stopped and
Krycek said, "How about going a little faster."

"No, we're doing okay like this."

"Come on, that's part of riding too.  Remember, just hold
on and when you want to stop, pull back on the reins."

Dana looked nervously to Krycek.  "I don't think I can."

"Dana, I have every confidence that you can.  Just give her
a little kick with your feet."

"Okay, just let me get my courage first."  Dana closed her
eyes and said a little prayer.  When she opened her eyes,
she kicked her feet and Bessie stood still.  She looked
over to Krycek, confused.

"A little harder, you barely touched her."

"Oh," she said and kicked her a little harder.  Bessie took
off and Dana reached for the saddle to hold on.  She heard
Krycek behind her, but once she started, she found that she
was paying more attention to enjoying the ride.  She pulled
back on Bessie and they stopped.

"Having fun?"  Krycek asked.  She nodded.  "Why haven't you
learned to ride before?"

"I've always been afraid of horses."

"Why?"

"Doesn't matter.  I think we should be going back now.  Is
that all right?"

"Of course.  Lead the way."

XXXXXXXXXX

When they arrived back, just outside of camp, Krycek
grabbed the reins of Dana's horse.  "We better stop here."
He jumped down and walked over to Dana, lifting his hands
up to her.

"Turn around again," she ordered.  He laughed and turned.
"All right," she said after her leg was thrown over.  He
turned back and smiled up at her, again raising his hands
to her.

She placed her hands on his shoulders and slid off as he
held her waist.  When she was on the ground, Krycek didn't
step away, but slid a hand up to her face and leaned down,
kissing her.  Dana was too stunned to move as he moved his
lips over hers.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Krycek stepped back from her and turned.  Dana looked
behind him and was horrified to see an angry Walter Skinner
standing about twenty feet away from them.

"Walter.  I-- I--" she stuttered.

"It was my fault," Krycek said.  "Not Dana's."

Skinner moved towards them and grabbed Dana by the arm,
pulling her.  "You just stay the hell away from her
Krycek."  As they were walking away, Skinner said, "Just be
thankful it was me and not Mulder who saw you.  What were
you thinking Dana?"

"I didn't know he was going to kiss me."

"What are you doing out here with him alone?"

"I don't want to say."

He stopped and spun her around to face him, grabbing both
of her arms.  "What games are you playing Dana?  I can't
believe you were out here alone with him.  Is it because of
Mulder and Diana?"

"What does that mean?"

"They're only friends you know.  Nothing more, no matter
what others say."

"So he says."

"Dana," he scolded.

She sighed and said, "I believe him.  It's just that I
don't trust Diana."

He turned her to walk again.  "You're really lucky.  Mulder
would have killed him if he had seen what I did."

"Walter, you're joking.  He would have been angry, yes, but
he wouldn't have killed him."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that Dana.  You've never
really seen Mulder's temper.  If I were you, I'd make sure
that I was never near Krycek again, for both of your
sakes."

"Walter, I really didn't know that he was going to kiss
me."

"So you said, but you didn't stop him either."

"I was shocked.  I couldn't move," she protested.

"Just don't let it happen again."

She nodded as they continued walking back to her camp.
 

August 13, 1852
Friday

When the sun rose over the wagon, Mulder awoke.  The air
was chilled, so he snuggled closer to Dana in an attempt to
warm up.  "Mmm," he said into her neck.

"What?" she asked.

"Do you know what day it is?"

"Friday?"

"No, I mean what today is?"  She shook her head.  "It's my
birthday."

She turned in his arms and smiled.  "Really?"

"Yes."

"You know, I don't think you've ever told me how old you
are.  I can't believe I've never asked."

"I'm twenty-six."

"Really, I didn't know you were so old."

Mulder laughed.  "I'm not an old man yet."

"No, I just mean I thought you were younger."  Dana stroked
his arm and asked, "What do you want for your birthday?"

Mulder smiled and said, "I think you can think of
something."

Dana looked behind her at the sleeping children.  "Not
now."

"Tonight?"

"Yes.  I just..."

"What?" he asked, concerned when he saw the expression on
her face.

She put her hands on his arms and pushed them away.  "Let
me up."

"Why?"

"I'm going to be sick."

Mulder jumped up and reached outside the wagon for a
hanging bucket.  He dumped most of the water out and rushed
it to Dana just as she threw up.

"What's wrong?" Samantha asked, rubbing her eyes.

Mulder moved to her and said, "Lie back down Samantha.
Mama's sick."

"Okay," she said, settling back down.

Mulder kissed Samantha's forehead before turning back to
Dana, who was sitting back on her heels, wiping her mouth.
"Finished?" he asked her.  She nodded and he placed the
bucket outside the wagon.  Dana curled back under the
covers and Mulder joined her.  "You've been getting sick a
lot lately."  Dana nodded.  "You haven't said anything,
but..."

"What?"

"Are you going to have a child?"

"I think I have another present for you."

"So you are?"

Dana nodded, biting her lower lip.  "Are you happy?"

Mulder hesitated before answering.  "You know I want more
children.  Now that I know it's a reality, I guess I'm just
worried."

"What are you worried about?"

Mulder ignored the question and instead asked, "When do you
expect the baby?"

"I think in January, maybe February."

"It'll be cold."

"I was born in January."

"Really.  I would prefer a warmer time of the year.  What
if I can't get help?"

"We'll be fine."

"Maybe we should have Diana come to live with us, at least
until the baby is born.  It would help to have another
woman."

"You can't be serious."

"She won't know anyone.  I'm the only one she has, so
she'll need someone to stay with for a while."

"I can't believe you," she said, pushing away from him.

"What?  I thought that was a perfect solution for you and
the baby.  And if it helps Diana, so much the better."
Dana sat up, grabbing her clothes.  "Where are you going?"

"I have cooking to do."

He tried to pull her back down, "Stay.  You don't have to
do that now."  She pushed against him, out of his grip.

"Yes, I do."

Mulder sighed and said, "I didn't mean to upset you."

"Just stop talking William."

XXXXXXXXXX

Mulder found Diana cooking breakfast, her nieces sitting
near her, quietly watching.  "Diana," he called.

She smiled as she turned around.  "Fox, good morning.  I
didn't expect you this early."

"I need to talk to you."

"Oh?"

"Yes.  I've decided to have Danny take care of your team
from now on."

"Your cousin?"

He nodded.  "He'll do a good job."

"Why Fox?  You promised to help me."

"I am helping.  Danny is very capable."

"Dana told you to do this," she said as she crossed her
arms in front of her, searching his wagons with her eyes,
but not finding the other woman in sight.

"No, this is my decision."

"You don't have to lie to me.  I know how she feels about
me.  She can't stand when you spend any time with me."

"That's not fair."

"You're abandoning me, just like before."

"What?" he asked incredulously.

"You left me for Penny.  Now you're leaving me again."

"Dana is my wife."

"So, she did ask you."

"No, that's not what I mean," he said, shaking his head.
"Look, I know you're upset, but it's going to be this way
now.  You're just going to have to trust me that Danny will
do a good job."  He turned to go.

"Fox, wait.  I'm sorry," Diana said.  "You're my friend
still, right?"

He came back to her.  "Yes, you know I am.  Diana, it's not
like we won't talk.  You're still riding with us.  I won't
abandon you, I promise."

Diana realized that he was going to do as he pleased.
There was no sense in arguing with him.  "All right.
Danny's driving my wagon."

"Thank you for understanding.  I have to get back to Dana
now."  She watched him for a moment and saw him climb into
his wagon.  Shaking her head, she turned back to her fire
to finish preparing breakfast.

XXXXXXXXXX

Dana had the wagon packed and the children ready.  She
watched Jimmy take his position next to the first wagon and
waited patiently for Danny to come to take care of the
second wagon, where she stood with the children.  When
Mulder walked up instead, she looked at him confused.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Danny is going to take care of Diana's wagon now."

"Really?"

Mulder nodded and put the children in the first wagon where
they could keep an eye on them.  He started the team moving
and looked over his shoulder saying, "Come on."

Dana shook herself and walked quickly up to him.  She put
her hand in his and he looked down.  "Thank you," she said.

"You come first.  Never doubt that Dana."  She placed her
head on his arm and smiled.  "But, I can't just leave Diana
to herself.  She didn't count on being on her own, raising
two children who aren't hers.  I can't just abandon her, I
hope you understand that."  When she didn't say anything,
he decided to change the subject.  "I'm pleased about the
baby."

"Is that why you did this?"

"Maybe.  I don't want you to be upset.  I want you and the
baby to be healthy."

"We're fine."

"That's good.  You will tell me if you aren't, won't you."

"Yes."  They walked quietly, content.  Dana looked over and
saw a wagon sitting abandoned.  "Whose wagon is that?"

"It's Taylor's.  He said he was losing some valuable
items."

"We won't have to leave anything behind will we?"

"I hope not.  I think we'll be fine."

"That's so sad.  I heard of others having to lighten their
wagon."

"We can always move some of the things from the other wagon
into this one if necessary.  We shouldn't have to lose
anything."

"Good," she said.

"Mama?" Caleb called, peeking over the back and trying to
get closer.

"Caleb, get back," Mulder yelled.  Caleb immediately ducked
back into the wagon.  "Sorry," he said to her.  "I didn't
mean to yell.  I just thought of Francis when he was that
close.

"No, you're right."

He called for Jimmy to stop the wagon and stopped his as
well.  Mulder said, "Caleb, come here."  He popped back up
and moved towards Mulder.
 
"Papa, I want to come out too," Samantha said from behind
Caleb.

"You want to walk with us?"  Samantha nodded and he helped
her climb out.  He handed her to Dana who set her on the
ground and grabbed her hand.  He then reached for Caleb and
lifted him onto his shoulders.

"Okay Jimmy, go ahead."

As they were walking, Samantha said, "This is fun."

Mulder glanced at Dana, looking guilty.  "I guess I haven't
been spending enough time with them if she thinks this is
fun."

"She missed you."  She shook her head.  "We missed you."

"I know."
 

August 21, 1852
Saturday

The men had to drive their cattle down to the river and
haul back some water for the company when they stopped late
in the evening.  Mulder was on first watch that night, so
Dana fed the boys and children.  As it began to rain, Dana
moved the children into the wagon, entertaining them until
they fell asleep.  She loved listening to the rain beat
down on the canvas, but sometimes, it got to her when it
continued on and on.

When Mulder returned to their wagon, he tried to shake the
water off, but ended up bringing it into the wagon.  "When
did they fall asleep?" he whispered.

"Just a little while ago."

"I'm bushed," he said as he pulled off his boots.  "This
weather makes me tired."

"Do you think we'll move on tomorrow?"

"If the rain stops sometime tonight, I think so."

In the dark, Dana helped him strip and rubbed him down,
trying to warm him as he shivered.  "Get under the covers."

"Like this?" he asked, indicating his exposed body.

Dana nodded.  "I'll help you warm up."  As Mulder crawled
in, she quickly stripped down as well and followed him.

"Mmm," Mulder said, pulling her close.  "You feel warm."

"And you're freezing.  Maybe you should wear more clothing
when you have to be on watch."

"No, it's just because of the rain."

Dana ran her hand over his chest.  "You know, I never gave
you your birthday present."

Mulder exhaled and said, "That's all right.  Just knowing
about the baby was enough."

"You don't want to?"

"Not now."

"When then?"

"Not until after the baby comes."

"What?" Dana asked, sitting up.  "Why not?"

Mulder laughed quietly.  "That's nice."

"What is?"

"That you enjoy it...when you're with me."

"I do.  So, why can't we?"

Mulder pulled her back down against him.  "When Penny and I
first knew we were going to have a child, I was so happy.
My mother and her mother said I should leave her alone.
That it would be better for her and the baby.  So, I did
and Penny seemed fine with that."

"But I don't mind."

"No, I don't want to take any chances."

"All right, if you really feel that way."

Mulder kissed her forehead.  "I'm feeling better."

"Good."

They listened to the rain beat down, enjoying just being
close.  Mulder finally broke the silence when he asked,
"How is it going with Jimmy and the widow?"

"You haven't asked him yourself?"

"No."

"I think they're getting serious.  It would be a good
match."

"Don't encourage him to marry yet."

"I don't understand that William.  Why shouldn't they get
married?" she asked, clearly confused.

"I think things are too uncertain."

"But I think they're in love.  We got married and we didn't
even have that."

"We got married because it was best for both of us.  Caleb
needed a father and Samantha needed a mother."

Dana began to draw patterns on his chest with her finger.
"Well, would it make any difference if I told you that she
needed a father for her child?"

"She's going to have a baby?"

"I'm asking you, would it make a difference?"

"Yes," he said, enclosing her hand that now rested on his
chest.  "If there was a child, then I would give my
blessing."

"They don't need your blessing to get married."

When Dana didn't say anything further, he asked "So is
she?"

"Is she what?"

Mulder exhaled, groaning.  "Is she going to have a child?"

"I wouldn't know, but I don't think so."

"Dana, if you don't know, why did you even mention it?"

"I was just supposing."

"God, you can drive me crazy sometimes.  Go to sleep."

He thought she had when she spoke again.  "Fort Boise was a
disappointment."

"Yes."

"Are you going to have Danny drive Diana's wagon all the
way?"

"Yes.  He's offered."

"And you're still planning on having Diana and her nieces
live with us."

"If I can't make any other arrangements, yes."  He lifted
her hand and brought it up to his lips.  "I know that's not
what you want to hear."

"You're right, it isn't.  But, I'll do as you ask William.
You're my husband.  I'll try to make do."

Mulder kissed her on the forehead.  "Thank you."

"Are you sure you don't want your other birthday present?"
she asked, looking up at him expectantly.

Mulder laughed and shook his head.  He whispered, "Go to
sleep."

~~~

Chapter 14

August 27, 1852
Friday

Quite a few members in the company were suffering from a
sickness.  Members started feeling sick the day before, but
others were soon falling to the same illness.  The most
common ailment was diarrhea and running a fever.  Mulder
was the only one in his family who was sick, but Skinner's
family was hit hard with Sharon, Victor, Margaret, and
Priscilla becoming sick.  They were especially worried
about Priscilla.  It seemed like every other family was hit
with the illness, but they were determined to keep
traveling.

That morning, when Mulder woke up, he felt especially weak,
but tried to hide it.  He climbed out of the wagon and
almost fell.  Dana was awake before him and was cooking
breakfast so she didn't notice him.

The children were waiting patiently for their breakfast and
watched Mulder walk towards them.  He stumbled towards Dana
and almost fell.  She turned just as he righted himself.
"Good morning," Mulder said.

She smiled and said, "Good morning.  Are you feeling
better?"

Mulder lied.  "Yes."

"Well go ahead and sit down.  I'm almost finished with
breakfast."  She turned back away from him and began
dishing out the food.  Mulder came over and sat away from
the children.  "Here you go.  Make sure you eat all of
that."

"I'm not really all that hungry," Mulder said.

She put her hands on her hips.  "You have to eat.  You need
to keep us your strength."

Mulder made a disgusted look, but said, "All right, if you
insist."

"Morning Mulder," Jimmy said.  "How are you feeling?"

"Better."

"You sure?  You don't look like it."

"I'm fine, Jimmy," Mulder said, "just fine."  Mulder
glanced Dana's way, warning him not to say anything else.

After they ate their food, Dana gathered the plates and
began cleaning them.  "I'll be ready soon," she said.

Mulder said quietly to Danny and Jimmy, "I need you to yoke
the oxen on my wagon for me.  I don't think I can do it."

"Mulder, if you can't do that, you shouldn't be driving."

"I'll be fine if you just do that for me."

Danny shook his head.  "I don't think that's a good idea."

"I agree," Jimmy said.  "You don't look very good."

"Well who do you think is going to do it if I don't?  I
don't want us to be left behind."  Jimmy and Danny both
looked at each other.  "What?" Mulder asked.

"Well, there is someone else who can drive," Danny said.

"Who?" Mulder asked.

Danny hesitated.  "Go on," Jimmy said.  "You brought it up.
Tell him."

"Just tell me." Mulder said testily.

"Dana can do it."

Mulder stared at him for a moment before recovering.
"That's not funny."

"It's true.  She can do it," Jimmy said.

"Dana!" Mulder yelled.

She looked up surprised at his tone, but walked over to
him.  "Yes?"

"When the hell did you learn to drive a team?"

Dana looked stunned.  She turned her gaze to Jimmy and
Danny.  "You told him?"

"Answer me.  When did you learn?"

"About three weeks ago."

"Did you teach her?" Mulder asked Jimmy.

"No, but it's a good thing she learned how to do it.
You're in no shape to drive," he said.

Mulder ignored his last comment.  "So you taught her?" he
asked Danny.

"No."

"Dana, who taught you?"

"I don't think you'll like my answer," she said.

"I want to know, who taught you?"

"Mr. Krycek."

"What?!" he yelled, getting to his feet.  Just as he rose,
he fell back and Jimmy caught him before he hit the ground.
"Oh god, I feel dizzy."

Diana came from around the wagon, alerted by Mulder's
shouting.  "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Dana said.

"It didn't sound like nothing.  Fox," Diana said after she
noticed him holding his head.  "You're worse, aren't you?"
Mulder shook his head.  "Yes, you are, I can tell.  Dana,
what can I do to help?"

"I can take care of him," she said.

"Dana, you're going to need to drive the team today," Jimmy
said.

"No!  I will not have my wife doing a man's job."

"You don't have any choice Mulder," Danny said.

Diana turned to Mulder, surprised.  "Dana knows how to
drive?"

"Wasn't my idea," Mulder mumbled.

"Dana, did you know he's running a fever?" Jimmy asked, his
hand on Mulder's forehead.

"No," she said, putting her hand to Mulder's forehead.  He
pushed it away.  "That means you're worse.  Why didn't you
tell me?"

"I'm fine.  I can take care of myself."

"Fox, someone will need to keep a cool rag on your
forehead.  Dana, let me do that for him."

"I'll be fine," Mulder asserted.

Dana looked at him, concerned.  Although it was the last
thing she wanted to happen, she realized that she wouldn't
be able to take care of him while she was driving.  She
swallowed her pride and said, "All right."

"I'll take care of yoking up the oxen Dana.  You drive the
wagon I've been driving."  Jimmy turned to Mulder and said,
"That way, you can keep an eye on her.  Come on, I'll help
you get back in the wagon.

Mulder realized he was defeated and nodded.  As he was
passing Dana, he said, "We're not finished talking about
this.  I can see I'm outnumbered, so you can drive.  But,
you let me know the minute you feel like you can't do it.
Agreed?"  Dana nodded and he let Jimmy help him into the
wagon.

XXXXXXXXXX

Throughout the day, the scenery became more mountainous.
Dana gripped the reins tighter whenever the road narrowed,
which forced the wagons to follow in a single line.  She
kept her eyes on the wagon ahead of her.  Jimmy and Danny
had placed her wagon in between them, with Jimmy leading.
He had explained that if she followed exactly the same path
as him, she would be fine.  She tried to keep her focus on
his wagon, but her attention shifted to the voices inside
the wagon whenever she heard them.

Inside, Diana tended to Mulder while Caleb and Samantha
played quietly.

"Fox, are you feeling any better?"  Diana took the rag and
rung it out and placed it tenderly back on his forehead.

"Not much," he said weakly.  His eyes drifted closed again.

"Papa?" Samantha said, inching closer.

"Don't come closer, Samantha," Diana said.

"Why?" she asked, pouting.

"Remember?  I told you.  You might get what your Papa has
and then you would feel just as bad as he did."

"Papa," Samantha said as she began inching towards him.

"Samantha, go sit down," Diana said, her voice rising.

"What's going on in there?" Dana asked from outside.

Mulder woke up when he heard their voices.  "What is it?"

"Nothing," Diana said, patting his arm.  "Go back to
sleep."  He nodded and soon fell asleep, too exhausted to
keep his eyes open.  She glanced over at the children and
saw that Caleb was sleeping, but Samantha was trying to
creep closer again.  "Stop Samantha," Diana said more
quietly.  To Dana, she said, "Samantha wants to sit by Fox.
I told her she shouldn't because it isn't safe."

"Where's Caleb?" Dana asked.

"Asleep by Samantha."

Dana looked forward to make sure it would be safe to turn
around and when it seemed fine, she turned and said,
"Samantha, you can't get by Papa.  Would you like to come
up with me?"

She didn't see her response, but soon felt a hand on her
waist.  Looking down, Dana saw Samantha standing behind
her, a sad look on her face.  "Diana, could you help her up
on the seat?" Dana asked.

"All right."  She lifted Samantha over the seat and then
disappeared back inside.

Samantha moved closer to Dana and she put her arm around
her, hugging her.  "You going to help Mama drive?"
Samantha smiled and nodded.  "Well, you keep your eyes on
Jimmy's wagon and tell me when to turn, all right?"

Samantha nodded.  "Why can't I be by Papa?"

"You might get what Papa has.  We just want to make sure
you're safe and don't get sick too.  I'm sure Papa will be
better soon.  We just have to be quiet and let him rest,
all right?"

"All right, Mama," she said and leaned against Dana.

XXXXXXXXXX

Inside the wagon, Diana squeezed the rag out and laid it on
Mulder's head.  "What?" Mulder asked, rising up.

Diana pushed him back down and Mulder relaxed.  Diana
looked to make sure Dana wasn't looking back.  Fearing that
she might not get another opportunity and not caring about
the consequences, she leaned down and kissed Mulder on the
lips.  She was surprised to find Mulder responding.  Mulder
pulled her down and laid gentle kisses along her jaw,
detouring down her neck.

"Mmm," Diana moaned quietly, leaning back to give him more
access, but he broke off.

"Dana?  In the day?" he asked, grinning.

When she looked down into his glazed eyes, she realized
that he didn't know who he was kissing.  She decided it was
best to take advantage of his haze.  "Go back to sleep,"
she said, smiling sadly.

He nodded and began to drift off again.  She glanced
towards Dana and was relieved to see Dana still turned
away, but was shocked to see Samantha watching her.
Samantha glared at her before turning around.  Diana was
thankful that the little girl remained quiet.
 

August 28, 1852
Saturday

Dana and Mulder were lying quietly in the wagon.  Friday
was a fog to Mulder, but he began feeling better in the
morning and by midday, he thanked Diana for helping, but
suggested that she return to her own wagon.  Samantha and
Caleb kept him company while Dana drove.  At night, the
children were sleeping while they talked quietly.

"You did a good job," Mulder admitted.

"How do you know?  You slept through most of it."

He nodded and said quietly, "You know, I would have taught
you."

"Would you have?"

"Yes, if you had asked."

"I don't think so.  I think your words were 'No way will my
wife do a man's job' or something like that.  I don't
believe you would have taught me."

Mulder turned on his side.  "I thought I had told you I
didn't want you to have anything to do with that man."

"I'm sorry, but he was right.  It was a good thing for me
to learn.  Besides, Danny was watching him the whole time.
I was safe."

"I bet the weasel is hoping I die.  Maybe take over for
me."

She sat up abruptly.  "William, I can't believe you said
that."

"It's true.  I think he has a thing for you."

She lay back down and said, "I just had a thought.  Maybe
we should get Mr. Krycek and Diana together."

"There's a thought," Mulder said, laughing.

"So, you forgive me?"

Mulder pulled her towards him.  "Of course.  But Dana, I
mean it.  Stay away from that man."  She nodded.  "I think
you're going to have to drive tomorrow too.  I still feel
weak."

"Have you heard about Priscilla?"

"How is she?"

"They don't think she will live through tomorrow.  She's
getting weaker.  It doesn't help that she's so young."

"Oh god, I didn't know it was that bad.  Sharon and Walter
must be going through hell.  First Francis, now Priscilla.
How are the rest of them doing?"

"About like you."

"I am feeling better you know.  Just weak."

"Good.  I think we should sleep now.  Good-night," she
said, snuggling closer to him.
 

August 29, 1852
Sunday

"Sharon," Dana said.  "I am so sorry."

"Dana," Sharon said, reaching for her hand as Dana sat down
beside her.  "I can't believe it.  I've lost another child.
How much more can God punish me?  I don't think I can take
any more loss."

"I know, but you're getting better, Sharon.  Victor and
Margaret seem to be recovering too.  Your family will be
fine."

"How can we know?" Sharon asked, tears beginning to fall.
"I thought Francis would be fine.  I thought my baby girl
would be fine.  Nothing is certain in this horrible
country."

"You'll survive," Dana said, trying to comfort her somehow.
"How is Walter doing?"

"He won't talk about it."

"Would you like me to see if he'll talk to me?  Or maybe to
William?"

Sharon shook her head.  "I don't think he would talk to you
either."

"Well, maybe he just needs time."

"Maybe."

She stood and said, "I better get back to William."

"How is he doing?"

"He's doing much better.  I believe he is almost completely
over it."

"That's good news."

"If you need to talk Sharon, let me know.  I'm here for
you."

"Thank you Dana."

XXXXXXXXXX

When Dana returned to her camp, she found Mulder stretched
out on a blanket, the children playing quietly by him.
Dana smiled when she saw Dog's head lying across Mulder's
lap as Mulder slowly stroked the dog's fur.  Dog lifted his
head when she approached.

"Well aren't you all a sight?" she said.

Mulder looked up and smiled.  "We're just relaxing."  She
moved to sit next to Mulder and he asked, "How is Sharon?"
Dana shook her head, tears beginning to fall.  Mulder
opened his arms and she fell into them.

"I feel so bad for her."

Mulder kissed her head.  "I know.  So do I."

"It just isn't fair.  She had five children when we left
and one on the way and in less than one month, she loses
two of them."

"I know how that feels."

She looked up at him.  "I'm sorry.  You do.  I wasn't
thinking."

"It's all right.  I suppose it's a little different.  My
boys didn't live a day.  I didn't get a chance to hold them
and love them like Walter and Sharon did with their
children."

"I hope you never have to experience that again."

Mulder smiled sadly.  "Me too."

"Have you talked to Walter?"

Mulder shook his head.  "I'll go soon, but I think they'll
probably still need time to grieve together."

Dana leaned away from him so that she could see him better.
"Do you think I shouldn't have gone so soon?"

"No.  I think they think of you like a daughter.  I'm sure
you are a comfort to them."

She leaned back down into him.  "I hope so."
 

August 30, 1852
Monday

In the morning, frost lay on the ground.  Ice formed in the
buckets and had to be broken to reach the water.  The days
were now like this, cold in the morning and gradually
war