Unbreachable

By 1to7fan  
xf1to7fan@yahoo.co.uk


DATE: September 2008
CLASSIFICATION: MSR, post-IWTB
RATING: NC17
SPIOLERS: IWTB, references to stuff back-in-the-day.
DISCLAIMER: Chris, Frank: I've got only honourable intentions
for your characters, promise!
SUMMARY: "Would you be prepared to send me away? Cast
me out of your life and never know or hear anything of me?"
It was not a real question, he merely wanted to make a
point.
FEEDBACK: Yes please!!    xf1to7fan@yahoo.co.uk
Notes: At the end

*****


Rural Virginia
January 13 2008
6:21 pm



On hearing the front door open, Mulder left what he was
doing and went to stand in the doorway between the kitchen
and the living room.

"Hey!" He said, his hands on either side of the frame, his tone
cautious. He had been anxious to see her all day, but didn't
want to sound over enthusiastic because he had no idea what
Scully's emotional state was. She smiled at him, but her
replying "hey" was barely above a whisper. She put her keys
and briefcase on the table and started to take her coat off as
Mulder came over to take it.

"How'd it go?"

"Well, I performed the procedure. So far so good, I guess. We
have had no negative indications."

"Good", he said with a smile, and went to put the coat on the
hanger. So she'd gone through with it, not given up. He was
happy. However when he turned back, her expression did not
mirror his. He frowned a little, asking an unspoken question.

"He's in terrible pain, Mulder. I'm putting him through such a
nightmare." He walked back to her, put his hands on her
shoulders and touched her forehead with his lips.

"What you're doing, is giving him a chance for life", he said
softly, looking into her eyes.

There was a sigh, then a resolute smile and a nod. "Yes".

He brushed a strand of red which had escaped from a
haphazard plait, and with a wider smile turned back to the
kitchen.

"Are you hungry?"

"Hmm, smells gorgeous", she said, slipped off her shoes and
followed him through, noting on her way the ironing board
and her freshly pressed clothes.

"Wait till you taste it, a master piece if there ever was one.
Fussili Marinara a la Mulder!"

Scully leaned against the frame, arms crossed, to contemplate
him. She couldn't suppress a grin at the sight of him wrestling
excitedly with pots and pans. Mulder had been doing a bigger
share of the house work for years now, ever since she started
at the hospital, but striving to do it with a flare was a different
matter. He looked up at her as he was ladling sauce on
platefuls of pasta, and was surprised to see her amusement.

"What!" He said laughing.

"The untameable Fox Mulder, thriving in his life as a house
husband. A few years back I would have thought the prospect
even more 'out there' than a giant blood-sucking worm!"

He laughed some more at that, but his expression was
thoughtful as they sat down to eat.

"That's all very well, Scully, except house *husband* is not
the appropriate noun for the circumstances." He was waving
his fork in her direction, his tone playful, but Scully could tell
what he was meaning to convey was not without significance.

"What noun would you use, then?"

"I don't know, actually... What I do know is that *husband*, as
related to a marriage, is defined within certain very strict
parameters, and once those parameters are breached a
rupture occurs, ie: divorce. Whereas the parameters of *our*
relationship are flexible to the point of non-existence, a
breach or rupture would be, by definition, impossible."

Ah, Scully thought to herself, we are not on the clear about
this yet. She was ready to go back to normal life with Mulder
and pretend the past couple of days had never happened,
but it was evident he still wanted a few crinkles ironed out.
His statement was frightfully accurate, and she understood
what he meant by it.

"That's very true, Mulder", she said in a more serious tone,
her eyes fixed on his. They gave each other a smile and
carried on eating for a spell in companionable silence,
punctuated only by Scully's appreciative remarks about the
Marinara sauce.

"Listen, now that you're free to go back into the world, do you
think I'll be able to retain a regular instalment of Mulder-
cuisine?"

It was intended as a bit of humour, but she immediately
sensed a distinct tension in the air. The issue of Mulder's
renewed freedom was something Scully had not had the
chance to direct any detained thought upon, the intensity of
recent events having claimed all of her admirable capacity for
conscious processing. As it was, Mulder's thoughts had been
monopolised all day by precisely that subject. What *could*
he do? His professional skills, abundant as they were,
remained confined to one field only. Granted, he was a
trained psychologist, but he could only cringe at the idea of
setting up as a therapist, people would surely leave with a
tenfold of the problems they came in with. Besides, there
was no Truth to be found in people's delusions. If he was
going to trade a life of tending to Scully's every need for any
other activity, it had to be worth it.

And that was the crux of the problem.

He knew what he wanted. To be able to go out there again
and look for the Truth, instead of catching brushed-over
smidgens of it in magazines, would mean the world to him.
But the agony he'd seen this old practice arouse in Scully
recently, had frightened him to the core. How can he not
have sensed it, the depth of her wounds? After all these
years, how could he still underestimate her ability to dress
fear and pain in an armour of stoicism? Her demons had finally
become greater than his own, and he had been too busy
fucking about with bits of newspaper to notice. If he thought
that he could protect her, he would gladly spend the rest of
his days striving to give Scully the elusive happiness that she
so much deserved. But he knew that it was out of his hands,
that her demons would catch up with her regardless of what
his daytime activities happened to be, and he could not let
her fear of facing them placate what was still both their
mission. A search for a Truth that would give them hope.

Scully could see the worry in his face and began to connect
the dots of reason, to guess at his train of thought. A cold
feeling started to creep into her chest and she looked down
at her plate, averting his eyes, knowing that the crinkles were
about to come out in full light. Mulder reached over and
grabbed her hand gently on top of the table. He looked at
her, willing her to look at him. When she did, their eyes locked
with the kind of intensity that moves mountains.

"Have you asked yourself about that, Scully? About me going
back into the world?"

After a moment of silence Scully broke the eye contact.

"I know where you're going with this", she said quietly. "It
doesn't need to be the dark side you go back into."

"What would you have me do?"

She looked at him, tilted her head in the faintest of shakes
and opened her mouth to say something, but closed it again,
her eyes pleading. Seeing fear and pain now dressed in glassy
blue, Mulder tried as best he could to reassure her.

"Scully, I'm not about to set up as a private investigator of the
paranormal or anything like that, if nothing else because I
wouldn't survive a single case without you there to keep my
ass in line, I think we can be pretty sure of *that*", he
pointed at the cuts on his face. "But I'm also pretty sure that
greater exposure to the world, no matter in what form, will
necessarily make me more vulnerable to that dark side, as
you call it." She had withdrawn her hand from under his and
now was clasping both of hers together, eyes on them,
looking small and tense in her chair. Mulder's worry was
climbing, her body language told him she still had the
inclination to shut him out, so he needed to connect with her,
make her understand that they were both in the same boat.
He kneeled down in front of her in order to force himself into
her line of vision, and firmly took her hands in his.

"The darkness *will* find us, Scully, regardless of what I do.
There are things you and I can never again claim ignorance of,
things that are gonna catch up with us sooner or later, and we
need to brace ourselves for when they come so that they
don't take us by surprise again. Otherwise we run the risk of
turning our backs on the things that matter... and giving up
any hopes of a future." His last words had an added
significance. Their future together and their future on this
planet were in his mind irrevocably linked. He somehow
thought that as long as they were together, they had a chance
of finding a way to beat that looming deadline that was now
less than five years away. It was a simple matter of faith, of
wanting to believe it was possible. A faith he knew Scully
shared with him but which had gradually been obscured by
fear. She had not given up, her resolution was strong, but her
demons had taken their grip in spite of herself. Now, as she
listened to Mulder's words and understood their full meaning,
she was faced by the uncertainty of their lives, demons past
and future swarming in her head, and Mulder's intention to
strengthen her determination failed as insecurity reared its
ugly face.

"I can't be certain what it will be like when the time comes,
Mulder. You are so determined, I hear no doubts in your
voice. And this determination of yours has always been
reassuring. It has always managed to restore my faith, to keep
me by your side fighting." Her voice began to break. "I've
followed you this far... and now I feel like I can't keep up any
more. I see your resolve still drive you forward, and I fear the
very thing that kept us together will finally take us apart."

There it was. She had said it again, the subject of his worst
nightmares. Mulder might still be able to look fearlessly into
the face of evil, he might be able to take on monsters and
plunge into darkness with a steady spirit. But the prospect of
losing Scully, his one and only rason d'etre, was more than he
could bear. Despite his racing heart and climbing fear,
however, he knew that the scenario of their separation was
an irrational one, and this time he was prepared with
arguments. He stood up and paced in front of her a moment,
agitated, trying to find the right words.

"Would you be prepared to send me away? Cast me out of
your life and never know or hear anything of me?" It was not
a real question, he merely wanted to make a point. Her
response came in a quiet voice.

"Of course not. I could never do that."

Point made.

"Well what then?" His voice carried a lot of emotion, this was
the kind of frustration he had not experienced for years until
recent days. His feelings were on edge, and he spoke with a
passion verging on anger. "It's no use pushing me away only
so far that you can melt to bits each time you see me". Scully
would have raised an eyebrow at his pretentiousness if it
wasn't for the complete lack of self appreciation in his
expression, which instead conveyed a kind of devotion to her
person. "I've already spent too much time in a limbo with you.
All those years, trying to contain myself, pretending I wasn't
ready to rip your clothes off and fuck you out of your mind.
I'm not going back there, Scully!"

She felt the undeniable wave of heat invade her body, like a
testament of her own inability to resist him. He saw the
change in her and came back to his knees, his hands on her
legs. They locked eyes once again and the rest of the world
disappeared. Mulder spoke on.

"I'm done pretending. What good would it be? That denial
would not shield you from any darkness, if anything it would
immerse you in an even deeper one. I know what you fear,
Scully. But you must know that your wounds are my own. We
both have demons to fight, and if we're ever gonna stand a
chance we must fight them together."

Her nod was a slight one but it meant the world to him. His
heart immediately began to lighten and fill with reverence for
this extraordinary woman in front of him. How astonishingly
beautiful she was, how deeply passionate. Her bravery and
resolve once again visible in her eyes. The love and loyalty she
radiated Mulder's most precious possession.

"I'm going to need help", she told him, matter-of-factly. His
hand went to the side of her face. What would he not do for
her.

"I'm entirely at your service."

And with that they kissed. Passionately. Before falling into an
embrace, him kneeling between her legs, arms around her
waist, his face in her neck. God she smelled good.

"I should go have a shower, stink of hospital", she muttered
into his hair, as if reading his thoughts. Mulder tightened his
embrace and breathed even deeper.

"Hm-m-" moved his nose further down her neck and sniffed
again. "Gorgeous-" down her cleavage, *sniff*. "Delicious-"
under her armpit, *sniff*. "Scully-smell."

"Mulderr!" A distinct giggle escaped her throat and suddenly
his whole world was painted in bright colours. He looked up at
her and this time he saw her radiant smile mirror his. He
kissed her again, lightly.

"Go on and have your shower. I'll clear up here." They both
stood up and as Scully headed for the bedroom, he followed
her with his gaze.

*****



What ensued was the fastest clearing away of plates and pans
in the history of mankind. The thought of his sexy partner in
the shower took a hold of his mind (and his nether regions) in
a way you would only have thought possible of a teenager in
the peak of his hormonal frenzy. He went to the bedroom
and took his clothes off before entering the bathroom
quietly.

*****



Scully was standing with her back to the door, feeling as hot
inside as the water running down her body. Her nipples were
almost raw with the friction, and as she ran her fingers
through her hair, she couldn't help but marvel at Mulder's
incredible capacity to arouse her. He didn't need to be
explicit, there was something about the way he looked at her,
sometimes even just the way he said her name, that sent her
hormones wild no matter where they were. She
remembered the torment of the years when they used to
spend nearly every waking hour in each other's company,
battling a gripping and increasingly undeniable sexual tension,
so intense that they feared the end of all things rational if
they gave into it. Out of her mind was right, she thought.

She heard the door open gently and close again, but didn't
turn around. Mulder had come in and was looking at her, she
could feel his eyes burning on her body. Then she felt him
step close behind. He wasn't touching her, but the air that
separated their skin, just millimetres apart, felt as if it was
alive with static energy. His breath on her ear, raw and
uneven, told her he was as far gone as she was. The moment
his erection made contact with her lower back was like the
start of a chain reaction. A jolt of electricity passed through
both of them, Mulder moaned gently in her ear, then took
the lobe in his mouth while he grabbed her shoulders and
pressed his body hard against her. She turned to face him and
he pushed her into the wall, pinning her arms on either side
of her head, and kissed her fiercely. His hands began to slide
down, to her neck, her breasts, and he started travelling
south with both lips and palms, until he was kneeling in front
of her for the third time that evening. Scully could barely hold
herself up against the wall. Her fingers had found his hair, his
shoulder, and nails dented flesh as he lifted her left leg with
his arm and started to erase the universe with his tongue. She
came in seconds and with a vengeance, moaning despite
herself, unable to suppress the vocal expression of her
pleasure. Her convulsions were far from finished, her right leg
threatening to give in, when she felt herself being lifted clean
off the floor and penetrated all in one swift movement. She
held on for dear life while mulder fucked her hard. His
forehead on the wall behind her. Her shoulder coming up to
meet it against the slippery surface with every thrust. She
came again just as he ejaculated, the convulsions powerfull
enough to sustain their position a few more seconds before
they started to collapse. As they slid down the wall, Scully
regained her feet and remained standing, but Mulder,
exhausted, continued to slide down her body. Once again on
his knees, his face against her belly, he wrapped his arms
around her hips and held on.

"I love you, Scully." Came his whisper. "Wouldn't last a day
without you."

She was undone. Dropping down to her knees, she held his
face in her hands, her tears diluting in hot water.

"Mulder. Forgive me. It was a terrible mistake."  

He kissed her, telling her without words that there was
nothing to be forgiven, and then rested his forehead against
hers.


**The End**



Notes:
Don't know if the date I used was the same one in the film-
can't wait till I get my hands on that dvd! January 13th is the
date on the book by Max Allan Collins.
Mulder saying "I'm done pretending" is a wink ;) to ejfurnia's
exquisite phile video "Love Remains The Same", in which I
thought she masterfully interpreted and portrayed the line.